controlling emotions
by FoxxFeather
Summary: Red head warrior, loyal best friends, silver haired enemy all conjured in this AU fic. Meet the RK crew and their journey past angst obstacles. life with no love, is no life at all. K&K lemon ahead. later chapters are better, believe me. R&R please
1. The beginning, always and ever shall be

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 1: The beginning… as always and ever shall be**

I have gotten replies from you guys about how the first chapter was 'not very satisfactory' but in the end it got better. Well, now I decided I should just edit the first chapter because the beginning is always important to the readers. Thank you for you who are about to read this story. If you think the first bit is just dull boring, well… sorry, but I assure you the other chapters are better " v and yeah… I have completely changed the whole chapter one. I read it again and thought 'eww… I cannot believe I made this story'. So here is my new reborn chapter 1

Oh yeah, and by the way, the characters here are from Rurouni kenshin, besides this dude that I happen to just "make" up. grin and so, the plot is mine too!

* * *

Kaoru's POV

Dreams are always the weirdest thing life could offer to you. Sometimes you remember and yet most of the time… you don't. People always seem to think that dreams foreshadow the future and that is how deja-vu comes into play. Sometimes people just think that dream is a blurry vision of the unconscious mind, and most importantly 'unconscious desire'. Or maybe even in matrix style!... I believe neither… at first.

But then again, something _did_ happen in my life that suddenly changed the whole point of dreams, because dreams, in my case, involve fantasy. And my fantasy just blinds my conscious mind. And if this one person in my dream did not stop me and wake me up to see the true light of reality, I guess my life would just be just like one of those that bangs into things because my mind is not working properly, wow… life is very, very, very, curious,..

It started when I opened my eyes to see the most beautiful landscape that I have ever seen. I was sitting on sand. It was white and soft, one of those kinds where it gets so hot when the sun shines its utmost rays of heat to the vast landscape. But it was not hot, but rather windy. The air entails the strong warm and fuzzy atmosphere that brings calmness to the whole body. The sky was amazingly blue and the beach salty water in front of me, made its wavy symphony. I was perplexed at first, but I did not care to wonder why such beautiful environment can be seen at this time, at this hour, at this new modern day.

I can feel the soft wind gushing towards me as if welcoming my presence. I sighed and crashed myself down to the soft sand and closed my eyes. I spread my arms wildly around the. Not to another second however, I noticed there was another presence. I opened my eyes and looked around. I saw red. It was a man… I think, because he was wearing traditional Japanese clothes that only suited for men. I couldn't see his face but to me he looked young. He was standing among the white sandy beach, his red hair blazing among the primary colors of the beach. He was glowing. He had this aura that soothes me somehow, even though we were quite apart.

Suddenly, the ground turned dark, the sky turned gray and all of my surrounding seems to be completely oblivious to this radical change. I was scared and all of the sudden the ground started to crumble. Gashes of dust and heat appeared from the crack. With no time to panic, I began to fall. I could see the gushes of fire from beneath me but somehow I could not feel anything. I screamed and yelled and screamed and yelled…

The tightness on my wrist made me glanced up. The admirable red headed man took hold of my hand. He tried to save me. Even though I was close enough to see his face, all I could see is a blurry vision, as if someone was trying to sensor his face. But my mind didn't matter at all. I was too scared to look down. His grip tightened.

Suddenly, I felt something lifted me. As I looked around, I saw him below, his hand reached up to me. I couldn't clearly see his face and his eyes were covered by his locks. But I knew he was smiling a handsome smile. I looked up to see white wings lifting me up. To my realization, it was my own wings, flapping its glowing feathers like the angels of the heavens. I smiled… he gave me wings.

I woke up with a jolt when I felt really cold liquid all over my body. I choked and gave a huge gasp. I opened my eyes only to find this 'cute' friend of mine, glaring her usual 'you-are-fucking-late-get-up-now' look. I looked at the clocked and groaned. My lazy butt isn't doing its proper work. My 'cute' friend pulled me and dragged me towards the bathroom. Ladies and gentleman, I present to you… my life.

My name is Kaoru Kamiya, please to meet you. Misao and I lived in an apartment just near the big city of Japan. I am 17 and Misao is a year younger. We don't go to the same school though. Misao's school is only a minute away while mine is 15 minutes away. We were friends since kindergarten, but because of high school, we went to different school. She was sick when we had the test and in response we couldn't make it to the same school together. It was a shame. Misao is a really smart person and the closest friend that I have.

I glanced at my watch while running towards the end of my life. It was the first day of school after the long holiday that I know better not to show up late. Of course, being the never-show-up-on-time person, I am just hoping that luck is just around the corner.

I was running out of breath as I stood just a few meters away from my school gate. 5 minutes late and I know I will be screwed if I am not in class for the next minute. I stared at the gate closing in front of me and I knew I had to hide so lurking police teachers (so we call them:)) wouldn't catch me being late. So I searched for a way back and I found a pile of garbage cans at the back of my school. Piling them up wasn't so hard, but climbing those piles of garbage cans would be harder than climbing Mount Everest. With a few hunches and grunts and pain, I can finally breathe in the smell of my supposedly prestigious school. I snorted and laughed mockingly. Prestigious school my fucking ass, I am just glad this is not one of the lowest.

The area was deserted but I had to get through the security guards. Frowning, I sighed. Then I remembered there was a small storage room where they have all the sports junk just near the entrance door. If I remember correctly, there was a window small enough for me to fit in. I searched for the window and wickedly smiled as I found what I was looking for. And so, the quest begins.

Climbing through the window probably wasn't the smartest thing to do nor was it the easiest thing to do. I have also yet to notice, that I seem to have gotten fatter over the holidays. Scrambling my way through the window, I finally went through and fell creating a loud thump as I hit the floor. One of my legs was tangled in the window and my face is squashed to the ground as I dangled upside down.

Then, I heard someone making small coughing noises. Stiffening, I glanced up to find a red-headed hunk (her first impression). He was staring at me with the most amazing eyes I have ever seen before. His long hair was tied and had long fringes covering his mystical eyes. Even in the darkish room I noticed how red his hair was. Too stunned to say anything, it took me 5 seconds to realize I was hanging upside down with my leg tangled in the window, my mouth open and to my horror; my school skirt was down, revealing my glamorous underwear.

I gasped and quickly pulled my skirt up and I heard him chuckled. My face went beat red and glared at this newcomer. 'Stop laughing!" I yelled at him. He looked at me again and started to laugh even harder. I groaned and tried to stand up. To my misery, he couldn't stop laughing as I tried so hard to get my foot out of the window and stand properly.

He was still laughing and I groaned lifting myself off the ground. He was pissing me off. So I took a step in front of him until his face was close to mine. He suddenly stopped his mischievous laughter and stared at me back. I can see the glint in his eyes and I knew he should not be underestimated.

'Wow, you have some nerve to laugh in my face instead of helping me up,' I said coldly. My teeth clenched and I had the urge to whip his ass. 'My first fucking day at school and here I am talking shit with you while you don't even have the courtesy to help a freakin' lady.'

'Are you sure you are a lady?' he answered back, sneering, his body was so close to mine I can feel my heartbeat racing. I tried to ignore it, 'by the way you tried to get in that small window and fall in heaps with your body upside down showing your fancy glamorous hello kitty underwear? I don't think so' He started to turn away and I had the urge to kick him in the behind. My face was unbeatably red and I knew I could burst any moment soon. Just before he left the room, taking a large pile of belongings from the storage room he looked at me and said, 'and I suggest you go to your class quickly. A _real_ lady is never late.'

I was fuming. Never in my life have I seen such a display. He was not worth my time and much to say he was right about one thing. A lady is never late. Groaning, I tried not to have my emotion take over me but focused on how to get to class. I took a deep breath and swallow. Here is one enemy I should look out for. He and his super handsome face will be shredded to pieces if I ever see him again. And although I didn't want to admit it, I silently prayed I can see him again.

Glancing at my watch I knew I had to get out of this room. That stupid asshole made me even more delayed.

Funny, I have never been this lucky. I somehow surpassed the whole school security and managed to dodge the teacher. Luckily, he was out of the room when I came in. The teacher was supposedly heading to the washroom.

I sighed in my seat and Megumi who was sitting in front of me didn't take any chances to miss this opportunity of teasing me. I guess she is one of those beings on this planet who couldn't shut her mouth. I used to call her the 'wicked witch of the whole world' when we were still in junior high class. And surprisingly, she also used to be quiet close to me. Not until she had sex with an older dude and became quite unlike herself. Unfortunately and somehow, she is still my friend.

* * *

2 hours later

The bell rang, and by the next two seconds, the students have already milled out of class, cruising their way to the cafeteria. I was still sleepy from the partying the night before that I practically slept through the whole session. Michi, a friend of mine, woke me up with a kick at my table that I stumbled and fell to the ground. I guess I would actually call myself a loser because I do act like one. Cursing silently to her, she just grinned and told me she was heading for the cafeteria quickly for she had a meeting with a teacher.

I wiped the drool from my mouth and sighed. I headed off to the cafeteria, knowing I forgot to get my breakfast this morning with all the fuss of being late. Alone, I walked to the cafeteria. I was wondering whether the irritating hunk whose name I do not know, was somewhere around. I really was not ready to face him and start another painful glaring contest. But as I walked pass a few people on my way; they whispered something that made me halt in the middle of the corridor.

'did you see that guy----'

'---I think he's too short---'

'he is just so gorgeous---'

'did you see his eyes?'

'---I'll put his name on my list---'

'don't you take him, he's mine!'

'I love his red hair---'

Were they talking about…? I turned around to hear more of what they were saying only to find Megumi. 'Kaoru-chan, you are late again as always, but you've missed the most important part of the whole school.' Megumi reached towards me and touched my shoulders.

'Arg… what the hell are you talking about Megumi.' I pushed her hand aside, but she was too busy dreaming. 'Why, that new mysterious hunk of chocolate of course' I pushed her hand aside again and asked, 'what do you mean?'

Megumi walked in front of her followed by her giggling girlfriends. 'Why… that graceful guy with those eyes of amber…' she grinned impishly.

I stared at her in shock, only to realize that all these people were talking about is … is… him? I cursed in the middle of the hallway and ignored the people who were looking at me strangely.

'A lady shouldn't curse loudly like that. Hence, even a _real_ lady doesn't even curse.' I stood rigid in my place. I silently pleaded for the sound of the voice not to be _his_. I was tired, already humiliated by him and his presence indicated he wanted a piece of me. Smiling maliciously, I slowly turned my body so I can face him.

I smiled at him, admiring his good looks and was about to say something rude, when a bunch of giggling girls were immediately all over him. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. These sorts of girls give 'girls' a bad name. His face was suddenly sour. He wasn't smiling his usual smile. It seemed to me he was forcing to smile. Strange, but I couldn't care less. I turned around and stalked off. Unknowingly, he was watching me walk off.

* * *

Later in the day

The last bell rang and everyone spontaneously relieved a sigh showing the usual liberating and yet tiring feeling at the end of the day. I quickly gathered my things, not wanting to spend anymore time at this school. I was working all night and now another wasted day is spent for sleeping and avoiding _him_. I am not a very promising person. I didn't think I would meet my parent's expectations. Instead, I should be studying and get good grades to get into university.

After a long walk down the street, I gazed into the sky wondering my purpose in life. The only friend I can trust is Misao. We would soon have to part. I have only been in for a year in this school. Another two years and I suppose we have to break into our right directions.

I reached down into my bag and picked up an envelope. The envelope was a bit twisted and crumpled due to the way I grasped and cried on it. This letter was too precious for me, as it was from my mother, given, the day she died.

_Life without love, is no life at all_

I could hear her in my head every time I read her letter. I knew she was always there for me. But why does she have to leave me at such a time? 'I miss you' I whispered to the letter. There was no one around but I really didn't care if they heard me. I really do miss her. I missed her smile, her sweet face, the way she would look up at me and say '_you are beautiful no matter who you are_.' She was my pole, the pillar of my life. I broke that pillar of life. I cracked it using my non-existent self esteem. She must be broken hearted when she knew about the boy that I regarded as my 'true love.' If only I did listen to her, I wouldn't feel so much regret.

My mother used to tell me that sometimes, after a hard time, it would be suitable for me to keep something precious and not share it with my audience. Sorry readers, but I will not speak more about my mother, for I would rather keep it too myself. I hope I am not being too selfish, but the memories were too precious for me to tell you.

I sighed and slipped the letter in my wallet, which consisted of the salary that I got from working late yesterday night. I knew I would need this money for my future for I would hope that someday I would make my mother and father happy.

Smiling to the picture of my family in my wallet, I took out the $200 money that I received and decided that I should give some to Misao and some to the bank. Putting the money back in again I also folded the envelope to be safe in my wallet. I was ready to place it in my bag until some unknown person seized my wallet and made the run.

For a second I was too bewildered to react that it took me another minute to realize that that person stole my most precious treasure. Angry, I yelled at him 'give it back you mother fucker!' Reacting to my scream, he ran faster. Not taking any more chances, I raced towards him. He turned a curve to make his way into a small hallway. I was fortunate enough to be quite athletic that I was near to catching up to him.

He was dodging garbage cans and cars parked on the sides. Being a gymnast was a very lucky thing because dodging them was pretty easy. Just as he was about to turn the corner, I yelled and made a dash. Using the most of my strength I charged after him. I slammed hard and knocked him over. I yelled and screamed and as he hit the ground I could hear him gave a big grunt. I was rolling on the ground and tried to get up but he was too quick for me that he kicked me in the stomach. I groaned and painfully coughed. Blood started to sprout from my mouth and glancing up at him, I widened my eyes. He was ready to start another blow. I hurriedly closed my eyes only to hear a loud grunt and painful yell.

I heard shuffling about that I dared myself to look up at the intruder who so happened to save my life. I looked up to see an immobile man on the ground and a figure with red hair. I groaned when I noticed who this person was and wondered which is more painful, the man's kick or another man's presence.

However, to my unfortunate luck, I couldn't stand up. I had a pain in my stomach and it seemed I have twisted my ankle when I fell. He walked towards me and I didn't dare look up. I felt a touch in my stomach and ankle. He was searching for any damages or serious injuries.

'Are you okay?' he finally asked. My head was still jumbled up; I didn't know whether to be mad at him or the man for stealing my treasure. 'I'm fine,' I replied. 'No you're not' he answered me back. I rolled my eyes at him when he knelt down and tried to get me off the ground.

I tried to stand but my left ankle ached and knew it was sprained. My legs weakened and I nearly collapsed to the ground before he seized me and held me with his arms around my waist. I had to try again not to twist red like a tomato and only complained, 'o, man. Why does this happen to me?'

He chuckled and I glared back at him, only to see his striking and stunning eyes. It bore into me as if I was sucked into those deep pools of fiery amber. I quickly looked away. 'You are one feisty one?' he retorted. I sniffled and felt guilty.

_Forgive ones foe and you shall compile to the heavens with sweet taste_

'Sorry,' I barely whispered. Remembering my mother's words, I knew this was not the time for arguments. 'Thank you,' I said again, 'for saving my precious.'

He smiled and noticed this was the first time he showed me a genuine smile. My heart did a flip-flop and suddenly had goose-bumps. 'What about your self?' he asked. 'I can take care of myself thank you very much,' I replied back. I tried to convince myself so by standing up by my own only to find my legs immobile. He held on to me before I fall and chuckled.

'Fine!' I knew I was wrong, but seeing him this way, the total opposite of the one from the school, made me more hesitant and awkward. It was strange to see another side of his. Strange, but very mysterious.

He picked up my wallet and bag and heaved it upon his shoulder. Then without warning, he swept me off the ground. Dazed, I became speechless, unlike the normal me. I couldn't seem to open my mouth and he too did not say anything. He carried me down the alleyway and stopped in the end of the alley where the main road can be seen.

'Okay, you have to be helpful here,' he remarked, 'I need to know your address.' He stared at me and his face held only a few inches apart from my own. My heart beat faster and I was worried if he could hear the loud thumping of my heart. His eyes were more than intoxicating. His sweet face made my heart melt like the candle in the dark night. For once in my life, I felt something unusual. I have to ignore this new sensation, I said to myself; I need to get a grip. Shaking my head silently, I turned away and spoke in a small voice, 'apartment Unix. Down the road next to the Java Pub.'

He walked down the road quietly, carrying me and my bags without much effort at all. I admit he was strong. And to my gratitude and serious irritation, it was he who saved my life and my treasure. Someday I have to thank him. But for now, I want to enjoy this new feeling that overcame me, for the first time in many years. Slowly, I dug deeper into his shirt, taking in his scent and feeling just slightly, his muscular body. I took the pleasure to silently be very close to him, without even knowing his name, but also hearing the rapid heartbeats from his hot body, the same way he listened to my own.

YES! YES! YES! I have changed the whole thing. Man, that took me quite a while. I thought I should refresh my mind with this story or possibly make a new one. With this chapter I nearly changed the whole plot. I hope you enjoy the change but I have to warn you the rest of the chapter might not follow too much from this edited chapter but I guarantee you that the rest of the chapter will make sense.

* * *

Thanks for reading------ and don't forget to review (the ones that make me happy!) 


	2. fantasy or reality

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 2: fantasy or reality**

Since I have edited the first chapter, I just thought I should continue editing the next bit. Thank you so much for reading and continuing to read that I hope to hear your responses after reading this story. I enjoy your comments (good ones that is) smile

I edited this story for the sake of keeping a controlled and not confusing story…

Best regards for you!

* * *

LAST CHAPTER

He walked down the road quietly, carrying me and my bags without much effort at all. I admit he was strong. And to my gratitude and serious irritation, it was he who saved my life and my treasure. Someday I have to thank him. But for now, I want to enjoy this new feeling that overcame me, for the first time in many years. Slowly, I dug deeper into his shirt, taking in his scent and feeling just slightly, his muscular body. I took the pleasure to silently be very close to him, without even knowing his name, but also hearing the rapid heartbeats from his hot body, the same way he listened to my own.

* * *

KENSHIN"S POV

I sat in my chair of my solemn apartment waiting for my email to open. I seem to have many from unknown people since I went to that school and I noticed that most of the emails were from girls. I frowned. I never gave my email address to anyone. They must be pretty keen to know me that they tracked down my email address.

I groaned, glaring at the computer with the need to smash it into pieces. This same routine goes the same with my old school. Girls were piling up with the hope of going out with me. Why are people in Japan so delusional? Do they take good looking guys for granted just because of the looks? I don't like to be regarded as one. Maybe I should just become ugly, I grinned to myself. Life was not much different. Not richer, unlike my hometown, but the community are the same.

The last email was still on its way and I wondered whether I should get a new account. All I need to know is how Sanosuke and everybody else were. I closed my eyes, hearing the email beeping and coming in…. I remembered my friend Sanosuke. He _is_ my best buddy of all. Many of my rivals would get their butts kicked by him if they ever bothered me. He didn't agree me taking off to another place so he got so angry at me when he heard I ran away from home.

I hated being near my home town. Life of wealth was not in my dictionary and I knew I shouldn't worry my parents. But after that incident I never wanted to see them again. They were being unfair with me. I sighed, replacing the silence left in my room. My life was miserable and I just wanted to be free and feel the _real_ feeling of being a human being. I was stranded with my own problems and the confusion frustrated me so much that I decided to take the risk.

I smiled, recalling the time I met this unknown woman I have first met in the storage room, upside down, wearing her old-fashioned hello kitty. She was so different than 'her.'

I sighed, leaning back against the chair. I wanted to get rid of 'her' from my mind. I want to set myself free from 'her.' She broke my heart and that was it. That was the last straw. Everyone else just couldn't see who she really was, and unfortunately, I was too late to find out myself.

The last email checked in and I half smiled. I was hoping life in Japan would be a lot different. But I guess, there was no where to escape.

* * *

Kaoru's POV

I sat in the classroom, in trance with my afternoon dream. If anyone sees me this way, they would think I must be out of my mind. Well, what can I say? I am out of my mind. I was not in reality, instead I was thinking about the event that happened just yesterday. I sighed and leaned my elbow against the table. I couldn't resist thinking more about yesterday.

Ironically, I dreamt of the red-headed man again and I still couldn't see his face. Serenity filled my silence when I woke up that morning. The dream fatigued me and yet created a smile upon my face. Fantasy just seemed better than reality.

I wondered whether the red-haired man whom was in my dream ever since 'he' came to school is actually him. Was it a coincidence that 'his' hair was also red? I only frowned considering the dramatic irony.

I sighed again, remembering how he swept me off my feet and walked carrying me and my bags then walked to my apartment. We were silent along the way there and finally when he reached my door, he didn't say anything else but to smile a half smile and waved good-bye. Startled, I didn't even ask him his name. Will he forever be nameless upon my lips?

'Kaoru?'

I didn't get how he could be such as asshole one time and became the knight in shining armor the next.

'Kaoru?'

I wonder whether he just wanted to be nice or because he saw a damsel in distress?

'KAORU?' someone's voice sliced my hearing cords and I glanced up to see Michi's face blaring with annoyance. 'How many freakin' times to I have to yell in order for you to look at me?'

'I'm sorry Michi,' I sat up straight, my face red in guilt. 'I was just tired,' I exclaimed, 'I think.'

Michi took a chair from a table next to me and brought it up close to where I am. I tried to hide my embarrassment, waiting for her to hit me with enormously humiliating questions.

'Of course you were tired, you must have not slept again last night,' she talked in a small voice. When I glanced at her, she was grinning. 'What are you hiding, monster?'

I guess a person like Michi shouldn't be regarded as stupid. She was smart, beautiful and has the darkest shooting green eyes I have ever seen. She was my first friend in this school and we were in good terms for a long time. We spent many days and nights together until she dated a college guy. She became quite distant, keeping herself open to him whenever possible. I understood her position. I would try to spend more time with my boyfriend if I don't see him everyday. We still talked and have fun.

I suppose, now would be the best time to talk to her. I still want to keep my feelings for myself, but knowing Michi, I know she would find a way to get the answer out of me.

'Well, a guy tried to steal my wallet,' I said. At least I told her the truth. She gasped and held my hand, 'are you okay?'

'Yeah, I'm fine. I was lucky that he was a slow runner actually,' I explained 'I caught up to him and got my wallet back.' She looked at my face carefully, looking for cracks of weakness. She found it. 'There's more,' she mischievously smiled.

I groaned and started to stand up but she was quick enough to keep me in place. 'Tell me Kaoru, please?'

I sighed and prepared myself to be more than humiliated. I looked at her hopeful face and I took another sigh and closed my eyes. 'He saved me,' I quickly said. She grabbed a hold of my hand and asked in the same hurried but quiet tone, 'who?'

I opened one eye and I knew my face looks twisted like I have been eating too much lemon lime sour candy. 'Him…' I told her again. She gave me a confused look. 'And **who** would that be?' she ridiculously asked me.

'It was him Michi,' I whispered, 'the red headed guy.'

There was silence and I skeptically looked at her dumbfounded face. 'You mean the new guy?' she asked me. I nodded and I saw her face gave the same twisted sour face as mine. 'O, don't go gaga on me Michi!' I said.

She didn't say anything at first, only to open her mouth as big as possible, in means of telling people that she was strikingly flabbergasted. I decided to continue on the story and told her about him carrying me and brought me to my apartment. I swore her mouth can fit a whole 20 hamburgers once I finished my story.

Finally she let out a reassured laugh and I sighed in respite. 'But Michi please swear that you will never tell anyone about anything that we have talked about in this table. Maybe even forget that we talked about this,' I pleaded. If this event is known about the school, I will be more than just dead. She nodded in approval, 'I swear,' she took hold of my pinkie with her pinkie, 'pinkie promise.' I smiled and we all laughed together.

'The thing is Michi,' I started again; 'I'm not so sure if it was a coincidence or was he actually trying to show he wanted to help. Because, I assure you, he wasn't being himself. He was a total jerk the first time I saw him.'

'I hear you girl,' she nodded in understanding. 'I know guys act different when they are alone and when they are with their friends.'

We wanted to continue to talk but the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch period. We gave each other secret smiles and went back to our proper table.

* * *

Kenshin's POV

The whole school day was the same as before. Many girls tried to create ways in order to get a glimpse of me. I nearly lost my temper, listening to giggling girls everywhere. I thought that this kind of place would be peaceful and people are not occupied with relationships of the sort. However, I was proven wrong. These people were dying to become my girlfriend and as much as I hated to do it, I have broken more hearts than I imagined.

Despite the usual clattering, I didn't see the girl I saved yesterday. I was wondering where she was. She was very striking. Not very graceful, but her face speaks for itself. Her eyes shone hope and vicious optimism that I rarely see in other people. There is a profound motivation within her eyes and I felt she have been hurt before. Interestingly, I wanted to meet her not only because I have yet to know her name, but she was conspicuously different than the rest.

So far, I haven't yet encountered any of my guy pals who wanted be close friends with me. I think jealousy blew and they thought I was the fast way to get to girls. I ignored them. I have seen many guys like them around my old school and I was not very fond of them.

Today so far had not been what I had expected. I heard the bell rang. Everyone gathered their bags but I sat on the table, looking out the window. I wondered whether it was the right choice to take a chance at this school or was there never a way to escape my misery.

I sighed and looked around and saw that everyone has left the class, eager to get home.

'Hey.' I heard movements behind me and I looked back to see a good-looking man, cute (girls would say) with dark brown eyes and dark brown hair. He smiled at me and I smiled back. 'I just wanted to introduce myself.'

He slowly walked up in front of my table and sat down. 'My name is Hiroaki, call me Hiro,' he said. I smiled, 'Kenshin. Please to meet you.'

I looked carefully at his face, wondering whether he wanted to know me just to get a girl from 'Kenshin's fan club' or actually there to be friends.

'I know what you think,' Hiro started, 'don't worry. I'm not here to ask for a girl's number. I just thought maybe we could be friends.' I was silent for a minute and decided the hell with it. I smiled back, but this time smiled with greater meaning.

* * *

Kaoru's POV

'I'M HOME!' I called as I opened the door to my apartment.

'Kaoru-chan, I just finished making dinner. How was your day at practice?' Misao said to me as I collapsed onto the sofa. She was wearing short pants, slimming t-shirt and a flowery apron.

'Misao chan, they were the same as always. I don't consider them to be of any particular event…' I said with a tone half audible. 'In fact, there was nothing special.' I whispered those words so Misao wouldn't hear it.

'Okay kaoru, here's your dinner.' Misao took two plates to the table and took off her apron, 'and guess what? I took the exams for university and made into top 100.' She exclaimed beaming with pride. I smiled at her. 'Good for you Misao,' I beamed as well, 'you deserve it.' Giggling together, we ate her delicious food and Misao rambled about how hard the exams were. I just smiled and make some comments like any best buddies do.

'So what other things are interesting there?' Misao asked with her mouth half full.

I glanced away, pretending to be looking outside the window. 'Hm, interesting?' I whispered. A small smile smudged my face. I told Michi about the guy. I should tell Misao about it too.

'Kaoru-chan, don't just keep secrets to yourself. I want to know as well.' She whined and gave me a puppy-eyed look. I smashed her face softly with a pillow I had held in my arms and laughed.

'Oh okay Misao. You don't need to give me those eyes. You know it doesn't work on me' I smiled at her. 'If there was anything interesting Misao, it would be looking at the way you look.' Misao hit me back and we both laughed.

I sighed and told her everything that have happened, just the way I told Michi. It was interesting to see the same reaction. Misao would widen her eyes and mouth on each and every sentence I made. Her playful gesture made my heart flutter. She was listening.

After the whole talking session was done I waited for her to say something.

'You know Kaoru,' she softly started to say, 'I'm afraid that you might not be able to accept him.' I was silent. I knew what she meant and I understood completely the consequences of a relationship. I nodded in approval.

'The reason being,' she started again, 'you might be hurt again. I don't want you to suffer anymore.'

We were both silent and I knew what she was talking about. Yes. We both have been through it. We both have suffered the feeling of loss and defeat, the feeling that never left my chest. I hate it. I've been spending my time trying to forget it. I will not be defeated again.

* * *

Misao's POV

I smiled to myself. It's a good thing that kaoru was being herself now. That guy must have had a huge impact on kaoru to make her all different from the way she is now. Maybe I should go check out who he was and his personality, just in case… pausing to myself, I reconsidered the idea. She had already been hurt. It's a bit too soon to start a relationship with a guy. And this one seems to be an awful lot of hard work.

Sighing, as Kaoru started to wash the dishes, I cleared out my plate. Kaoru is beautiful; there is no surprise about that. But somehow she seemed to be so lonely, like there wasn't any great activity in her mind. I wonder whether in that school anyone wanted to be friends with her. After her mother died she became less of herself and became shyer.

Kaoru's problems in the past were so big, her mind and soul inebriated. She was drunk on her own dilemma. She may look strong on the outside, but inside she feels pain and suffering not even I can imagine.

* * *

Kaoru's POV

I could hear the bell ringing in the distance. I did not want to wake up. The feeling of opening my eyelids were way beyond my power limits. I did not want to wake up.

I was so comfortable. This feeling I haven't felt in a long time. It felt like I have lost it and even it was just a blur, I feel tremendously affected by it. The world was still vivid in my mind. I feel… happy… for the first time in a long decade.

Slowly, without meaning to do it, I opened my eyes. There was a shadow above me. Fluttering my eyes to open I saw a figure. And that figure was holding me really gently and softly, in a warm embrace. There was a scent. The scent was so reassuring I felt safer that I can stay forever in this tranquility.

I slowly opened my eyelids. So heavy! Forcing them to open I saw…

* * *

After a dreadful week of editing, I made sure I followed the plot. I hope this made sense. Please R&R.

Warning: the rest of the chapter however, may not follow this story line, but I assure you I will try to edit the rest of the chapter soon. Right now, please enjoy this story ala me.


	3. The unexpected

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 3: The unexpected**

Let me start by saying that this is a very short chapter. I just hope it won't lose your interest. I have edited this part as I already promised and hope you people enjoy

Disclaimer: DON"T sue me! I never intended to spoil you're rights for Rurouni Kenshin… I'm just borrowing it… for the sake of me… Ne! Copyright of Kensuke Yukimura is mine… that is it…!

* * *

Last chapter:

I was so comfortable. This feeling I haven't felt in a long time. It felt like I have lost it and even it was just a blur, I feel tremendously affected by it. The world was still vivid in my mind. I feel… happy… for the first time in a long decade.

Slowly, without meaning to do it, I opened my eyes. There was a shadow above me. Fluttering my eyes to open I saw a figure. And that figure was holding me really gently and softly, in a warm embrace. There was a scent. The scent was so reassuring I felt safer that I can stay forever in this tranquility.

I slowly opened my eyelids. So heavy! Forcing them to open I saw…

* * *

Kaoru's POV

I slowly opened my eyelids. It was so heavy that I was sure I would rather keep it that way. I opened my eyes and tried to focus.

'So you're awake,' I heard a voice say. I was suddenly alert and quickly opened my eyes to see 'him.'

It took some time for me to take everything in. I first looked at him, then at how my arms were intertwined around his neck, then to the fact that I was off the ground. He was carrying me; just like the day I had my broken ankle and saved my life. I was flustered.

'Get off of me,' I screamed, panicky all of the sudden.

'Chill woman,' he said, dropping me to the ground where I tried to stand up but failing miserably. I finally stood up and saw his face expressionless, carrying his and my bag. His body was so up right, as if he worked so hard to get toned. His reddish hair blew magnificently as the gush of wind came. I gulped… 'What happened?' I asked.

'You were sleeping yet again,' he retorted walking past me, 'I had to carry you home. I can't just leave you stranded in school all alone now do I?' he walked slowly. That was when I noticed that we were just half way down to my apartment. He carried me all the way here? I stood rigid in my place, still taking in the reality.

'Hey wait up,' I called after him. He didn't look back so I ran softly towards him. I wondered why he wanted to carry me home. Besides, we go to different classes. I sighed, irritated that he didn't respond to my call. 'Are you mute?' I nearly yelled.

He stopped abruptly and looked back at me, his figure emitting deep sensual yet dangerous aura. 'I helped you and as a _lady_, don' I deserve a "thank you",' he replied in a low husky tone that send shivers down my spine. I only stood in silence, wanting so say something but couldn't. 'Besides,' he said again, turning to walk again, 'it was about time you woke up. For a small girl like you, it was surprising to carry your heavy weight.'

That's it, I chocked in my head.

'Listen buddy,' I called back, running after him and waving my arms wildly, 'I didn't ask you to carry me round about the place or bring me back home. We didn't start off great and we aren't really in good terms. I don't see what other girls see in you. To me you are just distur-' I couldn't continue because I felt my foot trip onto something on the ground and I didn't have the chance to react.

Nearly to the ground, I felt strong arms around my waist. The arm forced me to stand up but only to hit myself against his chest. I was quiet. I was too bewildered to say anything. Speechless, I could feel the beat of his heart as I unconsciously had my ear against his muscular chest. His body scent was so intoxicating; it sends shivers down my spine. I could absorb the warmth of his body, feeling for the first time… peace and tranquility.

I realized what I was doing and pushed him away from me. I was red and speechless. My legs were a bit weakened and I wondered if he was the reason I get so easily weakened.

He didn't say anything for while until he heavily sighed and said, 'I guess now you will not need my help.' He took my bag from his shoulder and held it towards me. I didn't react at first but I slowly took my bag from his grasp.

After I took my bag from his hands, he started to walk pass me again. I suddenly felt guilty. He helped me so many times and yet I never did say sorry or thank you to him. I looked back to see his back facing me. His tall figure inanimate against the sun, his shadow cast great power. I twisted my eyebrows. I had doubts.

* * *

Kenshin's POV

I slowly walked after handing her the bag. The sun shone brightly on my face, the sunset too beautiful to a wait. I didn't glance back at her. She was being very selfish.

I actually didn't know why I like to help her or carry her home. It was as if I cared about her. No. that wasn't it, I assured myself. I was trying to be a gentleman. I laughed in my mind, knowing this wasn't true. Then what is?

I remembered her sleeping alone in her classroom, everyone had left school already. She looked abandoned, nobody came to wake her up or tell her to go home. As if no one really cared about her. Was it pity?

I glanced carefully at my hands. She was so light and soft, her curves not quite visible but real. Her face extraordinarily shone innocence and vulnerability. I was so taken aback by her virtuousness that I realized how contaminated I was. I recognized that I was not the right person for her. Her susceptible face made me apprehended my weaknesses.

Unexpectedly, I felt soft and small arms wrapped around my waist from behind. Startled, I stopped in my tracks when I felt this soft and petite body against me. I didn't have to guess who it was, but it still shocked me how she can be so forward.

'I'm sorry' she said in a voice barely audible to hear. I sighed quietly and enjoyed this new feeling that stirred within me. My heart was racing and I have never felt anything like it.

'I'm sorry I was being such a bitch to you,' she said again and I held her hand and squeezed it. She released me and I slowly turned towards her. Our bodies were not further apart and I yet could see her beautiful blue eyes.

She blushed and I made a small smile, thinking how cute she really was. 'I mean, I wanted also to say thank you. I… I never had the chance to say thank you for saving my life at least two times already.' My mood suddenly picked up and I smiled a genuine smile.

'I guess,' she said quietly, 'I am just not very good around guys nowadays. I have learnt not to trust them.' I gave her a confused look but she shook her head and I understood she didn't want me to ask further.

I sighed and replied in a better voice, 'maybe we should start anew again. Hello, my name is Himura Kenshin.'

She smiled and responded, 'Kaoru Kamiya, please to meet you.'

* * *

Kaoru's POV

I walked down the street just a few meters away from the apartment. After the new introduction between me and Kenshin, I have felt much happier. She told me he needed to get something from the shop just around the corner that we separated, taking our own paths while smiling goofily.

I heard thunder ahead and looked up to the sky to see it was getting darker. I groaned. I didn't really expect it to rain just now, damn, my new school clothes will get wet then.

Not taking any hesitation, I ran towards the apartment. Just when I was about to open the gate to get into the apartment garden I stopped dead in my tracks. I looked in front of me with my eyes and mouth wide open. I felt like my heart stopped beating. Fear and hatred spread through me as I recognize this person in front of me. This was one person that I have been trying to avoid. This was the man that set fuel to fire. This was the man that gave me pleasure and pain.

Just a few meters away stood a dangerously handsome young man, not older than 21 with silver hair and eyes that freezes your whole body, immobile. His tall figure shone beneath the street lamp and the sky darkened even more, as if welcoming a devil. He was tall and muscular but he also has an aura that I have felt once and never wanted to feel it ever again.

He turned around and looked at me. Seeing the shock plastered on my face, he just smiled viciously. I was tempted to run but his eyes hypnotized mine and I could feel his stare forcing me to stand still. I sweat dropped as he took a few steps closer towards me.

'Kamiya Kaoru…' he said in this cold and husky tone.

His words were so icy it sends shivers down my spine. Hurt and anger spread through me. Yes, this was a feeling I am very familiar with. I tried to ignore the pressure that had filled my heart. My mind has never been this confused. Everything just seemed so convoluted. I wanted to run, and hide and throw myself at him and hurt him and kiss him.

His head bended down and I could see he has a sad small smile on his lips. No! I ordered myself not to melt again. he had done this trick so many times I will see to it that I would not fail this test.

I didn't say anything. My mind went blank all of the sudden. As if his smile turned off every nerve in my body. I don't like this. I hate this.

'Why won't you say anything?' he said, his words slow and smooth. It made me shiver. 'You know I've missed you.' He looked at me again with his expressionless face and saw my face showed more than fear. He smiled, satisfied with the reaction. I was silent so he steeped forward slightly and slowly, trying to judge my reaction, like a white gosh visible in the dark. He moved even closer and soon his face was more than close enough for me to remember all the dreadful things that have happened in the past.

I was shaking uncontrollably, and I felt as if all the horrid memories of the past came in my mind swiftly and rapidly. He took even closer steps and I cringed.

'Yukimura…' I gasped.

* * *

Ditto! I have completed another edited chapter. I just thought I liked it when I edit this part. I hope this made sense to you and I hope it has been more not complicated.

R&R please! No flames please. Arigatou.


	4. please don't

Controlling emotions Chapter four  
  
I can't believe I am so stuck with this fic... Seriously... with all the school works and stupid due dates... I was just thinking what a loser I must be....  
  
Anyway... enough talk... let's get on to the next chapter...  
  
DISCLAIMER: none of the characters are mine except Kensuke Yukimura... ne!!!  
  
Chapter 4: Why does he have to be here?  
  
'Why won't you say anything?' he said. His words slow and smooth. It made me shiver. He looked at me again with his expressionless face and saw my face turned color. When I didn't say anything he steeped forward slightly and slowly, trying to judge my reaction. When I didn't move, he moved closer. I stepped back...  
  
'Yukimura...' I gasped.  
  
He didn't stop. Instead reaching for me. One of his hands touched my cheek. I gasped and fell on the wall behind me. Great wall! I swore underneath my breath.  
  
'I told you don't call me Yukimura' he said slowly and huskily. My mind was still blank... No...! I pleaded silently. Don't come any closer...  
  
Cowering above me, his arms imprisoned me against the wall. I turned my face away so not to see those cold blue eyes. Instead, I could feel his rapid breathing against my cheek. I shut my eyes tightly. He's going to... he's going to...  
  
I could hear my heart beating rapidly. No! I don't want to do this! His breath tickled my ears. Slowly and carefully, he touched my ears with his tongue. I gasped. Smirking, he grabbed my cheek with his hand and his other hand reaching beneath me and cupped my body against his forcefully. I could feel his chest against mine. His heart beating through my chest.  
  
My face nearly touched his. I couldn't help but looked up at his face. His breath felt so close against my lips. Suddenly and forcefully he smashed his lips against mine. Horrified, I yelled and screamed through his mouth. Using my greatest strength I tried to pull away from him. Pushing his chest the cloud above me gave a thunder shriek.  
  
With that opportunity, I kicked him on the shin and pushed him away. He groaned and staggered backwards. Then, with the remaining strength of mine, I ran as fast as possible.  
  
It started to rain, and as I was about to reach the door to the small apartment, I could feel something pulling my clothes. With the huge amount of energy, my clothes ripped and I screamed.  
  
I don't believe this, I muttered under my breath as I saw my uniform clothes ripped on the shoulder. And I could feel cold yearning eyes taking a view of my body.  
  
Completely bewildered, I don't stand a chance against him. He was fast and powerful, nobody could beat him. The string of my bra hang loose from my shoulders and just as I was about to run away, he stepped with high speed to block me from the door.  
  
Gasping, I felt scared. Really scared.  
  
'Don't do this!' I pleaded at him. My voice sounded fearful.  
  
For a moment nothing happened, but the rain gets harder and my clothes felt limp and clinging wet against my body, completely transparent for his pleasure. This is not good.  
  
'You're never going to run away from me again,' he said, his breathing completely normal. 'You hurt my feelings bitch! You ran away from me. You know how much fucking pain I have to go through.' Laughing quietly, his wicked purple hair hung down covering part of his blazing blue eyes. 'But finally... I found you... and you will never... and I mean EVER going to run from me again.' Stepping forward he said, 'or you'll be sorry.'  
  
I felt my cheek wet, not because of the rain. But the tears from my eyes.  
  
He laughed quietly, and then with an evil grin, he stepped forward to reach me. I knew this was going to be over. My life will never be the same again.  
  
Then darkness clouded my eyes...  
  
* * *  
  
'AAARRRRGGGHHH,' I woke up screaming. My head hurts and my body suddenly felt weak. Sweat poured over my face and body.  
  
'Kaoru-chan' Misao came running towards me, her face filled with worry. Is this... what? What happened?  
  
'kaoru-chan,' Misao said again, her hand holding mine, reassuring me everything is fine. My hands clung on the sheet of my bed. I tried to gain composure, my head spinning.  
  
'Kaoru-chan... you must have a nightmare.' Stupefied, my eyes went wide. 'Nightmare?' I asked Misao. She looked at me confusingly. 'Yeah... when I came home, you were already asleep like you always do. You must've had a nightmare.' Confused I bend my head down. I didn't think it was a nightmare. It felt real. I looked down on my clothes; I already have my pajamas on. Where was my uniform?  
  
Staggering out of bed, I looked into the laundry. Nothing...  
  
'Misao, did you see my uniform?' I asked. She shook her head, 'no... I thought you already did something to it.'  
  
Shaking my head, I feel to the floor. What just happened... he came... yes he came... but what happened after that.  
  
Sighing, Misao touched my arm and said quietly, 'you must be tired Kaoru. Why don't you go back to sleep. Or if you want some hot tea? It's pretty cold in here... the rain just keeps coming.'  
  
Rain...  
  
I looked out the window... there must be some mistake... it was raining when it happened... but why am I not wet? Everything just seems weird...  
  
'Are you okay kaoru-chan.'  
  
I looked up to see a worried face... 'Yeah... I think I'll have some tea Misao... thanks'  
  
She smiled weakly and went out of my room. Convincing it must be a dream; I went back to my bed and lay down. Then I felt sick. I touched my head and there it is... I must have flu. Groaning, I turned my head on the pillow. How come now I have the flu?  
  
He he he.... Did I mess everything up... oh...? I just want a bit of lime in it... like I said... Do you hate Yukimura or not... I know he's not an RK character but I don't know who to put as a bad guy for this story.. So just imagine a really hot... hit but bad guy...(  
  
Thanks for the review ya... I'll update this fic as soon as possible... keep those reviews coming... they are very welcome... 


	5. he's here

Controlling emotions  
  
Chapter 5  
  
Oh my people thank you so much for the reviews...  
  
Ewunia: thanks so much for the review. I'll write some more. Just keep in touch with my fic Kaoru gal: hehe... was that too much for you. I'll update as soon as possible. And yeah, I've changed the POV's... when I looked at it again; I noticed how confusing it is... thanks... keep in touch Anime Asiangurl: woa1 why kiddin... I'll definitely write some more. Keep in touch! Anonymous: don't stay anonymous for long. Keep coming and read my fic! He he... I've changed the POV's though... I've got complaints on that already. The evil witch: thanks for reading my fic. I appreciate you comin again. Thanks Animeforever2004: thanks for the reviews. I've got no complaints for great reviews. And come again... read my third and fourth chapter... keep in touch!! Bokken of Doom: Well... I still don't get why you like 'he's just a wimp looking for attention.' I think who you were referring to is Kenshin. Oh well, it's your opinion anyway. Thanks for the confusion. He he... I'll definitely fix it up... thanks... keep reviewing... ne! Silver Goddess: thanks for the review... ne! Keep in touch... ja! Allin656: he he... I didn't know you would know Samurai deeper Kyo... but the answer is no... no way would I want to put Yukimura to be the bad guy... you kiddin'? I just thought about that name and the appropriate other name which is Kensuke... the name came from my Japanese friend. Oh well, keep in touch... thanks for the review. Ja!  
  
My my... thanks so much for the review. I finally updated my fic... I thought you guys would hate Yukimura touching kaoru... ne??? I was just wondering who would be the bad guy but ... I don't want Enishi to be the bad guy.... I like him... (Don't scowl!!) Anyway... here it is... my fifth chappie!!!!  
  
...  
  
*sniff* *sniff*  
  
'Kaoru...' Misao pocked her head through the door of my room. I had been sleeping in my room for two days now. My head still aches and my breathing rough. It just seemed impossible how I can get flu. I didn't think I remembered to be out in the rain... except in that dream... or was it really a dream?  
  
Misao placed a tray of breakfast next to me and beckoned me to eat it. I looked at her worried face and nodded. She made a small smile and said, 'I guess I'll be going kaoru. I need to finish my scholarship application. I think I will be able to succeed in this one.' She waved her goodbye and walked out.  
  
All of the sudden, I felt lonely. The silence deafened my ears and the sun was shining too brightly. My bed didn't feel comfortable, so as slowly as possible; I stood up from my bed groaning at the fierce headache that struck my brain.  
  
As I opened the door of the balcony, I felt the cool rainy breeze against my face. I could tell it was going to rain soon. The smell told me. I thought I should probably stay in bed again until I paused at an unfamiliar sight.  
  
Right below my balcony, laid a bouquet of flowers. I wasn't so sure what type of flower it was, but the image is so beautiful. I quickly scrambled towards the front door to catch the flower before the rain starts to pour.  
  
I smiled as I picked up the small and light bouquet of flowers and sniffed the refreshing aroma. So beautiful and white on a rainy day. It really lifted my hopes up. But curiosity spread into my mind. Who ever would send me these flowers?  
  
I searched for any possible hints, but nothing seemed to be attached. The flowers, wrapped in soft papery cloth, tied with beautiful long twirl silver ribbons; I could only find the word 'Kaoru...'  
  
* * *  
  
Kaoru's POV  
  
Sighing, I rested my head against the table. I was back at school now, busy with catching up with what I had left behind. So much work to do and no one seemed to care. It just seemed so obvious. Who would want to be friends with someone who doesn't want friends. Now I considered Megumi was my friend three years ago... but not until she developed in figure and raced out competing with other immature people like herself. For me... I just don't see the point in it.  
  
The class bell rang, signaling the end of the day. I felt so tired. I have three essays to do by tomorrow and I need time to actually do them. I've finished one, yet there was one essay on a new chapter. Yet, I couldn't be bothered to ask for notes. Nobody seemed to even notice my obvious stress because their minds were still surrounding that guy with the flaming red hair.  
  
Gathering my last bits and pieces, I took my time to pack my stuff. Everybody seemed to walk out of the room already. Barely noticing that someone was still in there, I looked out the window gloomily... thinking about my dream... or so it seemed...  
  
'What's with that sullen face?'  
  
I turned around to find a smirking face. This time, I didn't talk back, but looked at him with heavy eyes.  
  
'It's probably cuz' you're here...' I mumbled. He didn't budge. Instead, he crept behind my back and started tickling me. Shocked, I tried running away from him. But his face said otherwise, and raced to tickle me. I yelled...  
  
'Stop...'  
  
He stopped abruptly and smiled at me.  
  
'Kenshin, I hate you...' I mumbled at him before turning around to get my bag... I didn't mean what I said. I was just being a bit of a joke. But he didn't spoke anything and I thought he took it seriously. So I immediately looked at him, 'I didn't mean that...'  
  
'I know...' kenshin said a couple of seconds later. 'It's just that... this was the first time you have ever say anything to me with my name.'  
  
Standing still, I thought to myself. True... I never said his first name before. And when I thought it was odd to say his name, I thought it sounded pretty nice coming from my tongue.  
  
'Is that really your name?' I asked, wanting to sound funny but he didn't laugh. He just looked at me with this weird expression that I have never seen before and glanced out the window.  
  
It took a couple of minutes before he turned to me, his eyes, deep and drown able, amber hue glinting in his eyes, and walked out of the classroom in silence...  
  
What was THAT all about???  
  
Oh well, I took my folio and scrambled out of the classroom. I cannot believe it will be raining soon. And I forgot my umbrella how stupid!!!  
  
* * *  
  
I walked down the road towards my house again. I could feel something is not right. I turned at the corner of my house and I stopped walking. I remembered the 'dream' that just felt so real. He was here...  
  
In my dreams...  
  
He was here...  
  
Sudden tears forced its way out of me and I couldn't help but let it all out. I don't want to, my head screamed; I have done my best to escape from him... I never want to see him again. Sobbing quietly, I thanked god nobody was around. The street is quite and peaceful. My sobs broke the fragility of the silence that strengthened the atmosphere. I felt scared... scared and lonely.  
  
With the best of my strength, I lifted myself up and forced my way into my apartment. I don't ever want to see the place where he ripped my school clothes and licked my ears with his grotesque tongue. I don't ever want to see him look at me that way... the way he sees a prey. And I never... ever... absolutely ever want his lips against mine...  
  
As I walked my way in my room I saw Misao standing in a standing position. Her dress was of a costumed dress, beautiful blue to match her beautiful eyes. Yet her face showed a different emotion. She looked at me sadly and somehow nervous and anxious.  
  
'Misao...' I began, but was cut off by her.  
  
'-wait kaoru... before you say anything... I just want you to know... that you are the greatest friend that anyone could ever have...'  
  
My heart stops beating. I suddenly felt muted. Something bad is about to happen. She looked at me that way... it made me felt uneasy.  
  
'What is it...? Misao?' I stood still. The door still left ajar.  
  
'Kaoru... I'm afraid... that...' she stuttered and she knew I felt horrible too. However she had to say it. It's for both goods. 'Kaoru... I have to move out.'  
  
My heart dropped and eyes suddenly and painfully clouded. But I tried to hide that expression. I didn't want Misao to see me break again.  
  
'Well... I got a scholarship to get into Harvard...' Misao explained, she tried to look happy but failing. I gasped the word 'Harvard.' 'And, it's such a great opportunity to go into a school like that. And I've spent my free time thinking whether this would be great for both of us.'  
  
Misao looked down at her tiny pointy feet and her hands played with the hem of her beautiful blue dress. My mind was blank. I couldn't say anything. NO! I don't want to say anything... just because she said she was going to move out to another planet and leaving me lonely and afraid would not break me. I have felt much deeper sorrow than that... and it's for the best of her. I've put her into so much pain she should deserve to be rid of it. All of my escape from reality does not include her...  
  
'Misao...' I began, holding the tears and the gasp of fear that started to race through my veins. '... You know I'm going to miss you...'  
  
Misao looked at me bewildered. Even though her sadness still hadn't left her eyes yet she was still grinning and smiling this warm smile that I had never seen before. THIS is her happiness. And I want her to be happy... yes... I want her to be happy...  
  
Misao looked up and ran towards me, clinging onto my waist and sobbing like a crying baby. This reminded me of the old times when we were small and I was the one to be holding her and calming her tears. It was usually Misao that kept crying over things and I was the one to put her to peace. She would always greet me and smile in this radiance that I know I will be losing in just a few seconds.  
  
'When will you be leaving?' I asked my voice cracking. Her sobs still in the air, I couldn't feel sorrier for the girl. I waited until her sobs died down before she looked up at me and smiled, 'tomorrow the latest.'  
  
I froze.  
  
'Kaoru... I'm so sorry...' Misao was about to cry again when I held my hand up and shushed her, forcing a smile that I know I have deep down in my heart. I just couldn't pull it out. This isn't the right time. 'I can't believe you are way ahead of me,' I just replied. Her face confused at first but she grinned, though tears were still in her eyes. She was happy, and I felt glad she didn't see through this brick wall that I am building.  
  
'Well, I can't believe I made it to Harvard... I don't even remember joining to Harvard...' Misao replied jokingly. She is a very smart person. Even I couldn't beat her.  
  
'Oh yeah, I'm pretty sure you seduced the moderator...' I just smirked back. Misao looked at me with wide eyes and replied back. I hearted a laugh, feeling the one thing that I have missed these days. I felt relieved; she had given my hopes up.  
  
So we talked and joke and laugh all through the night. Until the night, the night where we have to separate into our own worlds. Relieved yet sad in some way, I would never forget her.  
  
* * *  
  
As I walked out of the school gates, I noticed the sky was darker than before. I couldn't help but get the feeling that it will rain soon. Having thought that, I started running. I don't have anybody to help me if I'm sick. I choked those words into my head and I could feel my heart squeezed at the thought. Misao is not here. A near tear nearly drop from my eyes, but I forced it way in again.  
  
I will not get broken again. I will not have that memory of...  
  
I stood rigid at my place. I just turned the corner to my nearly there apartment. But what I see before me is what made my eyes wide, my feet suddenly stoned and my heart beats the rate no other animal could beat. My throat felt dry and all of the sudden tears ran down my cheeks. I didn't wipe them away, but stood rigid at the sight before me.  
  
He ran his hands down his slivery locks; he stood in a very sexy silhouette; one of his hands inside his baggy pockets. Wearing baggy dark green jeans and white long sleeves shirt, vibrating his silver locks as he pushed the velvety looking hair out of the way, I felt a pang of anxiety, sadness, frightening, immobile, and all those words I wish to describe. He was to die for.  
  
When he pushed his locks covering his face, his blue electric eyes bore deep into mine. Yes, I cannot move. I cannot and somehow... don't want to... it's like as if he was hypnotizing me.  
  
He walked towards me slowly and I couldn't run. My fingers were wet and tears still coming down my cheeks. This couldn't be happening, I must be dreaming again.  
  
'Why...' he started, stopping in front of me, towering his hot body above mine. He was breathing hard, and I could feel his blue eyes roaming over my face, a satisfied look across his face. Why? Why is he contented?  
  
'I don't need those tears of joy...I know you couldn't wait to see me again... huh?'  
  
TEARS OF JOY??? My head screamed. I tried opening my mouth but nothing came out. TEARS OF JOY MY FUCKING ASS!!!  
  
He started to touch my cheeks, and I could've have vomited. Inching closer my body was pressed against his. I wanted to move! Damn it! I couldn't!!!  
  
Knowing what I was up to, 'you're not running away from me anymore... I have you now...' I could feel his wicked grin close to my lips, his breathing rough and I know he will have me this time. Tears rolled down my cheeks more than I want to.  
  
It's over... his hands trailed over the top of my chest and I wanted to gasp and scream and shout and kick... but I felt nothing... I just stood immobile.  
  
Shutting my eyes, I don't want to see anything else, but just then, just as he was about to kiss me, I felt him push me away forcefully, his dirty hands left my waist and chest. Why has he stopped?  
  
Curious, I opened my eyes and gasp at the sight before me. The red headed figure stood in front of me. Beauty that I know I could not grasp. His eyes overshadowed by his deep red locks. I couldn't see his expression. His mouth shut firmly and in his hands, he held a wooden plank.  
  
'... Kenshin...' I gasped his name, bewildered that he just smashed Yukimura to the ground. His hands pressed over his head, muttering long filthy curses. Why did he...  
  
Kenshin looked up at me and I gasp to see his piercing amber gaze, as he stood lightly, eyes still on mine. I stepped back... wait... I can move!  
  
Before I could even look up, I could already see Yukimura smashed here and there, completely helpless, although his figure is bigger than Kenshin's. When Kenshin finished with his fight, he grasped the front of Yukimura's shirt easily until his face came upon his and muttered some things that I couldn't hear. He let go of Yukimura's shirt and threw the wooden plank at him.  
  
I just stood there, immobile at the scene that he made. I grasped for air, clutching hard at my bag, shivering, shaking.  
  
'Let's go' Kenshin stood before me, and then I could see his face. I was shocked to see his eyes. His eyes not amber... but violet... the hue gave a warm atmosphere. This was the first time I have seen his gaze change. His arm eyes suddenly eased my shakes and I nodded slowly.  
  
As if my life flashed before my eyes, I could see, just in that one second, an evil grin behind Kenshin's figure. Yukimura, held the wooden plank high, ready to plunge Kenshin to the ground. I wanted to scream!!! He could hurt Kenshin.  
  
Yukimura's eyes went wide, and he dropped his plank to the ground, and fell hard. I froze. Kenshin had sense his appearance and punched him in the stomach. He had felt it. My knees suddenly felt weak and my eyes started to blur.  
  
It started to rain...  
  
And my world went blank...  
  
HO HO HO!!! I finally updated it. Phew! I decided to make this chapter long. I have plot already so thanks for that. Well... a bit of change... a little action...  
  
Did you like it??? Please review... please please please pretty please with a cherry and chocolate fudge on top!!! 


	6. coming with the hots i think

**Controlling emotions**

**Chapter 6**

Oh my God... yes I have finally updated. I know I have major apologies for you guys!!!!!! So..... Sorry!!!!! I know I don't get many reviews so I think that's one of the reasons that let me down. I took some time writing this shit and now I'm back in the game. For u people convinced something lemony is gonna happen... yeah... I'm planning on it...unless you guys don't want me to..... So review!!!!! Please. After reading this press the damn button and write three or four words that'll do fine. Thank u!!!!

Let's press on...

* * *

Kenshin's POV

For me, women are nothing. They are basically... wait! what do those people like to call themselves with........... Oh ya, slut. So I treated most of them... well, all of them, like one. Girls just go over to me and fuck themselves like shit. Man, why are women so not intricate? Well, for one reason, they are all the same. They want to act like one another and treat themselves high and mighty. Yes, that's it. But you know what's captivating? Why is this woman laying on my bed at my apartment so different from them? There is something rather intriguing from this raven haired girl.

I walked to the kitchen to pour myself some coffee. I have been wasting my god damn time rescuing a girl I thought would love to be with me. Well, at least for a day. She was a nice lemon to squeeze, I thought to myself. Yeah, she was beautiful and despite her innocence she was rather annoyingly aggressive.

I sighed as I lay on the couch resting in the middle of my small living room. It's comfy mind you. Not like the one that I have in my mansion but this will do. I laid back my head and squeezed my eyes shut. If Sano knew I risked saving a girl he would laugh his fucking head off. Seriously!!!!

As I ran my hand through my red locks I was drowned with millions of words. I captured so many reasons to take advantage of this situation. This would be the perfect opportunity. I longed for some raven innocence. But I still have pride and an asshole stamp has already been stapled to my forehead. It's taken, yeah. But the more reason to take advantage of her, the more I want to protect her. Yeah, I can control the feeling to fuck her. I can control any emotions that pass by me. Every one of them and that is the reason why I am so irresistible (I think.)

Confused in this situation, I started to hum. It was a song that Tomoe used to sing to me. O, how much I miss her...

* * *

Kaoru's POV

Strange...

I knew something recently had just happened but my head was still aching as I woke up. The room I was in was dark, and it took me forever to get my mind back in my head. I have low blood pressure. It runs in the family. Man, I must have really hit the ground hard, as I saw a black bruise on my left arm. Or so I think it was black because it was so dark and gloomy.

I tried looking for the door, swinging my arms this way and that. The pressure in my head sent jolts of white stars blocking my eyes. I really hate that when it happens.

Still swaying I saw the door opened and a stream of light passes through and a shadowy figure stood upon the door still. And yet, I tripped. My body smashed against the figure to hear the beating of his heart. I started to panic and I swear I could feel my pulse rising higher and higher as he lifted me softly from his body and I swore, I could pass out right there as dark hue of amber met my eyes. I was still for ages, as if time has come to its rest.

You know the story! When two eyes meet each other and they are both sending jolts of spark to one another. And time stands still and everything just seems to be only you and him. But what if that wasn't the story? What if he was the first to look away just when the moment start to get feathery light and sensuality spreads the air?

I groaned as he lifted me up to my feet slowly, his strong arms gathering my ruined body from atop of his. I was so embarrassed. This was the person who rescued me that night. This was the person who I was dying not to get in touch with. This was the person who, despite his good looks, the most annoying guy of the century. But why does my story have to be that twisted???

'Kenshin,' I started, trying to fill the gap of awkward silence surrounding the room, 'I... just wanted to say...' Wait, what do I wanna say? Do I wanna say that this thing is none of your business? That this stupid story should not include you? I raised my hands to cover my eyes in order for me to think more clearly.

'Shit!'

I looked up at him, 'what?' Did he just say shit to me?

'Come here,' he gestured towards me. He was coming closer when I stepped back, my heart thumping. O my god, o my god, o my god, I repeated this to myself.

'What?' he looked up at me confusingly and he quickly grabbed my left arm as I started, again, to panic. 'You have this god damn shit to fix.' I was confused and man did I feel so embarrassed when he pointed at my bruise.

'O. This?' I sighed, breathing a sigh of relieve. I thought he was going to charge me. I was smooching red as I sat down on the couch of his small living room and kneaded my left arm gently. It was painful yes, but he said after this, the blood stream would flow better. I just nodded, and do what he said while he tries to get some pain relieve.

As I kneaded my left arm, I looked around his room. It was quite tidy for a normal guy's room. It was basically neat and tidy here and there. He must be _sick_ to be this tidy! Besides the tidiness it was raving simplicity. I noticed a Bauhaus shaped chair next to the small TV. Products like those are pretty expensive I would think. And not to mention his couch. So darn comfy, I wonder where he got it.

As he walked in the living room, I could finally glare at his figure. Such a great body and how much I feel I owe him so much for saving my life. Yep, my life. I didn't really want to talk about it. But when he seated himself on the comfy couch next to me to apply cream on my bruise, I couldn't resist but tell the truth. The thing is, he shouldn't even be in the picture.

'Listen,' I started with a whisper, but he shushed me using his one finger to press against my mouth. Instead of shushing, I sentenced myself more confidently and said, 'thank you.'

He looked at me and turned away, before he can get out of the couch I stood up and said in a higher tone, 'I really thank you for what you've done. But I really do hope this will be the last time you would ever save me.'

His expression hasn't changed at all. On the contrary, he smiled and took my hand, which I would've snapped it away if only he didn't hold it too tight and said in a quite but very deep brave voice to me, 'I know.'

* * *

Kenshin's POV

She was walking away from me. She snapped my freaking hand away and walked out of my room. Who the hell does she think she is anyway? But she turned to me with a sorrowful look. A painful look that made me stood gaping for a moment. Okay, maybe there's a story to all of this, a big story.

Before I knew it, I reacted without thinking. I blocked her path and looked at her straight in the eyes. She didn't look back. She just squirmed her eyes shut and blinked her eyes. Was she crying? Oh no!

'Listen, Kenshin, I thank you for saving my butt but can't you just---- let me go?' Kaoru, with her beautiful blue eyes said to me.

'Kaoru!' I yelled. Was she that pathetic? 'I want to help you!'

Kaoru looked at me straight in the eye and shook her head. 'How? --- I am hopelessly unbearably ----- hopeless.' For a moment I didn't quite understand.

'You wouldn't understand' she shook her head again; 'I don't want you to get involved in this already complicated situation.'

'Listen!' I practically yelled, 'that guy tried to rape you, yes. And what did you do about it? Huh? Nothing! Yes you were probably helpless and all but that doesn't mean you could just stand there completely immobile. Shit girl! I so happen to find you there and what would your life be, if I was not there to save you?'

I knew I was loud, I knew her heart was screaming 'shut up' to me. But I couldn't help it. I couldn't bear the look on her face when that filthy man strokes her. Kaoru was crying and to make it clear I said, 'I am willing to help you...' in a much softer tone.

For a minute she looked away, tears rolling down her cheeks and I regretted it straight away. 'I am a man of my words. I _am_ willing to protect you.'

She shook her head again, squeezing her eyes shut. 'You can't just kick me out of your life. I'm already involved whether you like it or not.' I sighed. She was so hurt I could tell.

'Besides,' I said in a softer tone, 'you are in --- agony...'

This time she looked up at me. Her blue eyes blurred with crystalline beads of tears. But her features turned softer. She stared at me quite yielding. Like a kitten with their huge cute eyes staring at her owner saying 'please.' I can feel her pain up my spine, and I swear it locates itself into my veins.

Before I knew it, I seized her arm and pulled her into my embrace. I held her in my arms while she cried and cried. Tears soaked my shirt but I didn't care. For a moment I thought I shouldn't have force my guard to protect her. At that moment I was still unsure. Me? Protecting a girl? Not just a girl! It was kaoru. The girl that despises him; the girl that didn't even notice me that much; the girl that was so convince she was strong; the girl that is now feeling so weak and helpless braced in his arms, drenched with pain.

For that moment in time, I feel wanted again. Since Tomoe, I can feel the need again. The need to protect...

* * *

Okay that's it for now. I have a plan for this, and the story is going to get more interesting. Please review. I actually have a plot for this and if you want me to continue please review. Please!!!!!!!!!! I need some reviews!!!!!!!!! To boost up my spirit! Come on!!!!! Press the button!!!!!!


	7. my secret

**Controlling emotions**

**Chapter 7**

**My secret**

Ya knoe wat? Thanks sooo much, I really appreciate those reviews. Hey, at least it's more than 4-5 words!!!! Lolz. Keep them coming!!!!!

legolasEstelstar: hey thanks for the review! Keep them coming. I know what you mean with the lemon thing. That's what I'm planning anyways, the part with the romantic bit. I'm not just gonna go straight to pure sex. I appreciate your review. Keep them coming! And hey who said being new means I wont listen to you. YOU are very much appreciated. Haha

Reignashii: of course I remember you. Thank you so much for the review. You are very welcome to read . Here's the next chapter. Enjoy!

j9482002: hey! Ha ha... I've updated! Thanks for your support!

Kao-gurl: thank you, thank you! You'll find out about Tomoe sooner and why she is even in the story. All I can say though is 'don't worry.' Keep reviewing!!!!!

kirie-kun: hey thanks a whole lot. If you want the lemon just say so and ill see if I can fit it in the story. Muahahaa too!!!! Cheers! Keep reviewing please!

This is the story when Kaoru tells her actual story and hopefully this will clear all the weird stuff that's been happening to her. Oh, Kaoru's not raped yet, just touched and stuff. Harassment see! About Tomoe, just so you know, she is still alive. The story about her will come soon, I am serious about the lemon, but you guys have to tell me and support whatever you think is best for this story. So keep reviewing... o... I love, I love, I love. Ha ha ha...

* * *

From last chapter:

Before I knew it, I seized her arm and pulled her into my embrace. I held her in my arms while she cried and cried. Tears soaked my shirt but I didn't care. For a moment I thought I shouldn't have force my guard to protect her. At that moment I was still unsure. Me? Protecting a girl? Not just a girl! It was kaoru. The girl that despises him; the girl that didn't even notice me that much; the girl that was so convince she was strong; the girl that is now feeling so weak and helpless braced in his arms, drenched with pain.

For that moment in time, I feel wanted again. Since Tomoe, I can feel the need again. The need to protect...

* * *

Kenshin's POV

Here she is now, sitting on my couch holding a cup of coffee with her both hands and her body scrunched together as if cold. Cute as she is, I offered her some blankets which she threw on top of her body. I was so relieved when she decided to stay with me. If she goes out now, that son of an asshole would probably be waiting on her doorstep. No way would that happen!

'Are you still cold? I can get you some more blanket if you want,' I offered but she shook her head slightly and looked a bit shy. She would face me in the eyes. 'No, thank you,' she replied weakly.

Atop the awkward silence, I have just sat in front of her, sipping my own coffee and all the while stared at her. She was uncomfortable, so I decided to make a move.

'So, how do you know this guy?'

Kaoru was still. At that slightest moment I can feel her searing pain. 'Listen, if you don't want to talk about it its fine by me.' Kaoru shook her head and looked at me. There was something different in her eyes. She looked at me with _hope_, the one word that I am lacking of, the one word which shoots my veins into my brains and mixed them to make goo.

'He was my ex,' Kaoru started with a whisper. Her ex? That (%!$&) (%#$&#&#(&%&!$& man?

'He was so nice to me. Just like when you picture a perfect boyfriend. A perfect life, it was all too perfect.' She made it sound so $%#!&#& perfect. As if HE was that perfect.

'And, oh my god, I can't believe I was that stupid!!!' Yep, I kind of have to agree with that. 'All that he wants was the money.' ---- Okay... that didn't sound so good. She sighed and I let her take her time to continue with the story.

'You know I loved him.' Kaoru looked up at me in a very --- peculiar --- way. 'it was all too perfect. Perfect. HE was prefect. And I trusted him. Until that day my father died. You see, my mom passed away when I was 6, I really miss her. When my mother died, its like, my life came apart and my heart just can't take it anymore.' She sobbed slightly; I thought I should stop her but she continued on. 'I didn't believe in love. But that wasn't until Yuki--- came to me. Those were the sweetest days of my life.'

You know what? I actually felt a pang of jealousy for this guy. To have someone who made a difference to a person who loved him and trusted him. A great disgust washed over me. How could he do such a thing to that person? In my mind I was speechless. Weird huh? There was too much to say about this guy that my mind felt numb. My mind = Kaoru (sigh......) the guy (#%(&%!!(!#$!&#!!%$#! X 100000)

Kaoru laughed a little, but her face was in pain all over again. The color of her face still painted pale. 'You know, I even thought about marrying him. I was so happy. My father was happy. And he was happy too. I would even think my mother would be happy. And yet, how can I be so stupid.'

I gazed at her pretty but worn out face. There was a deep urge for me to hug her and let me protect her, in my arms. Too fragile. Yes, that was it. She seems strong, yet mysterious enough she looked so feeble. I don't get why, but I feel so concerned.

'When my father died, he became quite weird and all. One time he can be so sweet and romantic and one time he can be so aggressive and compulsively so irrational. And you know why? He wanted my fortunes. That was the only reason he wants to be with Me.' a single tear ran down her cheeks. 'That was the only reason he was even going out with me. Worst, --- the reason he wanted to marry me. My father's fortune will only be given to me when I am to marry, or when I am 18.' Kaoru kept looking into my eyes with each and single word she said, as if to test me. 'He wants to marry me before I turn 18, so instead he gets all.'

I returned her stare. I know why she is looking at me. She doesn't trust men. Each words she said to me, she wants to see my reaction if the money really mattered.

'Kaoru, I want to protect you even before I knew the story. You don't trust men and I don't see why you should after telling me that story.' She was still looking at me but her face softened. 'I don't need you to gain my trust. For all I know, you should NOT trust me. But I ask of you, an offer. I wish to protect you from anything until you turn 18. I promise I will. And then I can be out of your life. If you want, forever. Just--- let me guard you.'

Kaoru kept staring and I urged myself to look at her in the eyes. 'Kenshin, why do you care so much?'

I sighed. 'Because I know what you are feeling. I have your issue too. The same kind, just opposite sex.'

Kaoru closed her eyes and I waited until she decided. 'Okay' she nodded. I smiled and stared again at her face. 'But what can you do?'

* * *

Kaoru's POV

I didn't know what to say. I knew I've put myself in between the tangles of my life. He looked at me so passionately. I just wanted to kiss him right then and there. My feelings were controlled though. He wanted to help me. But how?

'If you want to,' Kenshin said quite shyly, 'you can stay at my apartment until you turn 18.' I turned bright red. Sleep with a GUY? That didn't sound right. But it does make sense. I am all alone since Misao left and nobody that I know who would even want me. So I guess the safest place is to be with him.

'It can be an issue,' I exclaimed. And he nodded but said, 'it just seems the only way. When is your birthday anyway?'

'29th of December,' I answered. 'So we have about like... 4 months.'

Kenshin nodded and smiled at her. 'Four months seems like a short way.' I shook my head, 'it may seem like that.'

Kenshin stood up and went to his answering machine and clicked. '_You have 18 messages.' _He groaned and listened. Weird enough, most of them were girls, and one of them I realized was Megumi. My, my, my...

When the message machine stopped he sighed and turned to look at me. 'Sorry about that. I forgot to listen to it.' 'Oh no, don't worry about that,' somehow I felt jealousy spread over me. This guy has 18, 18 messages on his answering machine. That is not even a quarter of mine. Hey, I see what he means. I laughed in my heart. He was always chased by the girls at school. It intimidates me but I guess it was not fun, being the cute and chunk of a hot hunk he is.

'I usually get 30 on my first day in school. Half of them are from the same person.' He laughed lightly, and I laughed heartily with him. He smiled at me; I'm guessing he was happy to see me smile again. I just blushed and I mean really blushed.

'So, just out of curiosity --- um --- what did they do?' I asked quite shyly. He looked at me for an instant wondering what question am I asking but he understood and nodded.

'Well, imagine thousands of guys all over you, everywhere, every time, every second of your life. As though they cant get enough of you. Well, you would wonder when you can actually find a life. And, like you... I found it. My life. My lost life. A life that was stranded deep in your heart.' I nodded, startled at how similar our situation is.

'Her name was Tomoe.' The second he said that sentence my heart made a giant leap and the chilled my body. There goes another jealousy. 'She was my life, the greatest life I've ever had.'

He chuckled vaguely. 'You know, before I've always thought of women as... sluts; bitches and all those crappie names they call each other with. But she was different.' I gulped; I sensed an awkward atmosphere surrounding us. 'And yet, I found out, she --- was just like the rest.'

'It's funny how we both have the same experience,' he exclaimed.

'What did she do to you?' I asked. He looked at me firmly and spoke in a low tone but I could feel the shiver up my spine with his cold tone, 'she slept with a man who I thought was my best friend.'

* * *

Kenshin's POV

Its funny how people managed to be so selfish and self esteemed. There is no pride in them, every single inch of their heart confounding black. I always believed there is that person, the one person that would soon change you and your life, away from the coldness of your surroundings. The question is, when?

Kaoru was quiet when I finished my story with a blood wrinkled tone. She looked a bit scared and I regretted what I said. I was quite fond of her, to tell you the truth. She amazes me with her story of her life, and how much we share the same opportunity to change our course of life. She has astounding beauty; there shouldn't be anyone to disturb her feelings. One way or another, I chose to be in her life. I may have done the wrong thing, but to see her face when I told her I would WANT to help her made my heart weak.

Ha ha... since when do I get all mushy-gushy and everything? Maybe I've been reading and listening to so much of them. You know from whom. Maybe I should ugly-fy myself. That way, they won't disturb me anymore. The question is, how? I've tried to make myself unattractive, but no matter how unattractive I made myself look, they keep coming more and more. One way they found me cute, one way they found me amazingly hot, and one way they find me handsome and fully mysterious.

Kaoru stood up and ask for the bathroom, I pointed to her left, indicating a beige door. She looked at me before going into the bathroom. She looked at me with hope. I smiled and she smiled in relieve.

As I glanced up to see the clock, I found out I only had 4 hours of sleep before school starts. Sighing in frustration I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep...

* * *

Kaoru's POV

I left the bathroom with relieve and comfy ness. And I glanced to see Kenshin already asleep on the couch. I sighed and smiled. He looked so cute like that and so tired too. And it was my entire fault.

I stood in front of him, memorizing his features. There is too much to just describe in words but his face showed a complexity of anguish, guilt, pain, dream, and love. I felt so honored to have him care for me so much. I have to thank him somehow.

With red blush on my cheeks and a little nervousness I bent over to him and planted a single kiss on his forehead. Kenshin stirred but didn't wake. I smiled in relieved and gathered myself to sleep on the couch on his other side, and closed my eyes to bring myself for a safe and relieving sleep...

* * *

Phew!!!!! I finished my chappie 7! You know, it took me 3 days to write 2000 words and funny enough took me years to finish off my 4000 word essay. I only have a few more days until my holidays are finished and man!!!!! I have so much work to do. You know how it feels right. I'm quite fixated with this story that I'd rather write this story than do my homework. Tell me it's wrong!

Anyway!!!! I hope this clears your confusion to the story. Ha ha ha... please review. Press the stupid button again and please just write 3-4 words whatever you want. And if I have enough reviews I'll get chapter 8 out soon!!!!!! WRITE AS MANY AS YOU WANT!!!!! Cheers guys!


	8. many problems to one solution

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 8: I feel safe... I think**

I would like to send a big thanks to those people who have reviewed! And those who haven't... you don't want me to bring battousai here to threaten to kill you! You know how dangerous he can be!!!!! It's just that reviews make me work harder and fill me with hope.... And spirit... and love... oh whatever, please just press the damn button after you read. It is MOST appreciated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

kirie-kun : thanks so muchieee. I'll bring it. And quite soon too. Here's your chapter. And hey I'll see when I can squeeze in THE lemon. Haha to you too!!!!

Kao-gurl : I love kenshin so much too. I dunno if I can actually continue this when school comes. Being an IB student is hard. It's just that, stories like these flows from my head like... a nice cup of coffee. jk jk... and school projects, essays and all those crap feels like a third degree kind of thing... n'ways, I'll try not to let school get in the way... wait... this story get in the way. Phew. THANKS SO MUCH!!!!!

legolasEstelstar : well, you know what, some people just reads and don't review. Or sometimes they pick ones with the largest amount of reviews... I mean (blushes too) sometimes I do that too! Haha... Lolz. 'Shoots battousai glares'---- well, about the lemon, I've got some story behind that and you'll see soon. So keep reading and reviewing!!!!!! Alert maaann!!!! Ha ha ha

j9482002 : I'll beg you to keep reviewing. Thanks for dropping in... keep dropping in!!!!! LOLZ

Reignashii : wow, you're so into lemon... don't worry bout that, there's a reason for me to rate this story an R. and anyways, I've got an evil plan behind all this. The story actually has a plot... ha ha ha... lolz!!!!! Please keep reviewing!!!!

Kaoru gal: hey thanks for the review! Please keep them coming! Thanks again!!!!

Vi3t BaBiI: hey keep reviewing **two thumbs up!** Thanks for the review! I totally appreciate it!

Kawaii96: oh my thanks too. Keep reading. Keep reviewing!!!!!

* * *

From last chapter:

I stood in front of him, memorizing his features. There is too much to just describe in words but his face showed a complexity of anguish, guilt, pain, dream, and love. I felt so honored to have him care for me so much. I have to thank him somehow.

With red blush on my cheeks and a little nervousness I bent over to him and planted a single kiss on his forehead. Kenshin stirred but didn't wake. I smiled in relieved and gathered myself to sleep on the couch on his other side, and closed my eyes to bring myself for a safe and relieving sleep...

* * *

Kaoru's POV

As I set foot into the classroom it feels weird. Nobody knew what happened to me the other night. Kenshin left early in order to get some work done before school starts, as it says so on the note pad that he left me with breakfast of toast and egg on the kitchen counter. He was being so nice to me and sometimes it made me feel guilty. Maybe I shouldn't have taken his offer. It was doing too much grief for him. Even though I judged it too early, but I will depend on this person.

I saw Kenshin sitting at the back of the class, maybe there in order to watch any movement. I didn't know if I should find this funny or not, but maybe his actions are quite extremely spy act. But I smiled at him without any body knowing. I took my place at the front seat before the girls have started to giggle for Kenshin. I then thought how much I knew how painful it is to acknowledge them personally without getting any one's heart broken. How many times must he go through with this?

Fortunately, the teacher came on time and we took our seats to begin our lesson.

* * *

Kenshin's POV

There is a reason why we are left outside of the classroom with buckets full of water in our hands. Yep, we slept during class, me and Kaoru that is. I didn't really know how to put this but I am actually glad that kaoru is beside me. Then I could watch her more peacefully. I had to pretend to sleep in order to go outside with Kaoru. She slept 5 minutes after the first lesson started. She looked so adorable.

As we stood with our backs to our wall I began to hum. It was a simple song that Tomoe... wait... Tomoe...

"Kenshin?" Kaoru asked me, "kenshin what's wrong?"

I looked up at her to find her face featured confused. I forced a small smile. "Nothing," I exclaimed. But then I turned my head away. Why? How? Tomoe? I must be overreacting, or haven't slept in a long time.

Speaking of not sleeping...

"Hey kaoru... do you mind detention?" I asked Kaoru as she grimaced at how heavy the bucket of water is. "You mean when they decide to break your arms? Hell no!"

I laughed and she blushed, but I continued, "Well, why don't we just drop this freaking detention and run for it?"

She looked at me in horror and OH MAN how much I missed that horror face of hers. "You mean LEAVING our detention?" she whispered quite strongly and frustratingly, "then you'll get double detention!" she wanted to scream but had to silent her voice.

"Nah!" I shook my head a little, "did you know how long we have slept last night? 4 hours! And now that I am SO sleepy, I'd rather just go home... and sleep." I dropped my bucket on the floor and straightened my clothes.

"You DARE!" she said quite frighteningly. I wanted to laugh out loud but that'll just throw out the situation. I glanced at her and smiled. "Come on kaoru, I know you want to..."

She looked at me pessimistically. She knew I was right and yet she didn't want to lose. "YOU can get into double detention! Or even suspension!" she nearly screamed.

"Hey, suspension is not a bad idea, and then I can sleep whenever I want!"

Kaoru looked at me in disbelieve, and then turned her head to ignore me. I sighed and said, "Kaoru, when was the last time you have done something that would surprise even your self?' She didn't answer.

I sighed again and turned my back to her. After five small slow steps I felt a tap in my shoulder and I turned around to see Kaoru, blushing a beautiful shade of pink. Man, this girl is cute!

"I know a place where we can rest without people knowing," she said to me. I raised an eyebrow. Hey, she finally came to her senses!

* * *

Kenshin's POV

Well, the first time I saw this place I didn't really catch the view but of Kaoru alone resting her head against a tree. But now that I have seen more than kaoru, I felt amazement washed over me. This was the place where Kaoru cried over a single paper.

Kaoru skipped to the roots of the tree and with a sigh, slumped herself on the log. She spread her arms wide and I didn't know if it was a coincidence or not, a silent but strong gush of wind swept its way for kaoru. I can feel the energy that the wind blew and how it transformed the beautiful scene... to an indescribable feeling.

As Kaoru closed her eyes, I closed in on her and knelt by her side, resting my own head against the tree but never left my eyes away from her.

When she opened her eyes she was surprised to see me staring her way. "Hey!" she said and stood up. Kaoru rested her chin on her knees and folded her arms around her legs.

"Why did you cry?"

Kaoru looked up at me confusingly. "What do you mean?" before I knew it I said those words. Damn mouth! "Well, I kinda followed you here." Kaoru looked at me, again, more confusingly.

"Why were you following me?"

"I was interested in you."

"Interested? In me? Whatever for?" She frowned

"Hm, let's see... you are either no a relationship type of person, or that you are NOT interested in me."

She laughed.

"See! That's why I was interested in you! You were not them."

"Well, that's why they called me THEE geek, THEE reject. That's why I'm different"

"Hey! Being a reject isn't all that bad. I'm telling you, you're different!"

She didn't say anything but I knew she was blushing. I was still curious though. I wanted to know more.

"Did any guy ask you out?"

YES! I yelled in my head, she blushed. But she nodded

"How many guys have you dated?"

She shook her head.

"None? How many guys asked you out?"

She didn't answer.

"Why aren't you answering?" I poked her at her side and she reacted. I smiled to myself and she looked at me in horror. "Kenshin! NO! Don't even---"

Before she knew it she giggled and screamed and yelled and laughed as I tickled her over and over again. She was wriggling like a worm and somehow, unintended, we rolled to the side of the sakura tree.

I stopped my actions and looked below me to see a flushed Kaoru, smiling her beautiful most sweet smile. And then, there was that spark. Everything seemed to stand still. We were inches away and I could feel the beat of her heart against my chest. There was stillness in the air. But a gush of soft wind blew her hair against my arms. It tickled but instead made me burn. Her blue eyes shocked my pulse and gravity seemed to be pulling me down. Her blue eyes captured mine and I gave in to the sweet devour of her sweet smell. Her raven hair blew passed her face and made me hotter. I nearly drowned. My heart beat faster and faster. My head felt heavy and her delicious lips just inches apart from mine. Inches, more than just enough to press my lips against hers------

"Ten."

"What?" I came back to reality. "Ten," she whispered again, "that was how many guys asked me out on my first week of school."

* * *

Kaoru's POV

I didn't want to believe it. But I may, I may, just may have fallen. I didn't want to get into that mess again and now I had to fix the situation. I had to say something before it was too late. He looked so adorable though, I groaned in my mind. He was so hot. His breath touched my lips and how I can feel it swollen. He didn't even touch my lips yet. It was so intense. His eyes, his lips, his red flaming hair across my cheeks, one arm around my waist, his chest and his heart beat----- shut up Kaoru! Silent down before you hurt yourself.

"Ten?" he breathed again. How much I regretted it when we broke apart the... sensual atmosphere and flesh burning sensation. "Yes, ten. I declined all of them. And guess who was jealous?" he stood up and took a seat next to the lump of the tree and rested his head against the bark of the tree. I just sat slowly up and crossed my legs.

"Megumi," Kenshin nodded.

"Yeah, and have you heard about the rumor?"

Kenshin shook his head and frowned.

"She said---- I wasn't interested in men."

There was a huge silence that filled the atmosphere. He looked at me dubiously and laughed out loud.

"What's so funny? I mean..." I giggled.

"I'm sorry, you just----..." he stopped short and looked at me doubtfully. "I just don't see you with a woman. I mean, you're not gay right?---------------- right?"

"Do you see me as being gay? I mean, I loved a man for God's sakes; I even had the guts to discuss marriage-----..." I spoke too fast and before I knew it, there it was again. The same sensation when someone would stab me behind my back.

Kenshin didn't respond. He just looked at me but I ignored his stare. I will not let myself look so miserably unhappy and scared. My god, I actually feel like my great grandmother who died a month after her husband divorced her. Doesn't that sound so ironic? I didn't want to look weak, and somehow I knew that Kenshin felt me. My pain... and sufferings. It actually felt quite good.

"You know," I tried to fill the silence, "I was thinking about what you said about protecting me, and I think it would be awkward if we were seen together like this. I mean, there would be people having rumors of us and it could get worse if somebody knew we were actually living together." I took a deep breath and exhaled loudly. "It... can be an issue."

Kenshin smiled at me and responded, "So, what do you have in mind?"

I took breathes slowly and I was fidgeting here and there. "I don't know."

"So, you're saying, we should do something, and that something means something to not put US in issue. And that means, we should find a way that won't make them suspicious... hm..." Kenshin was thinking and only one solution was in his mind. "I think I know what that something might be..."

I looked at him thoroughly, "really?" Kenshin laughed and clapped his hands, "YES THAT"S IT!"

I was in a shock when he stood up all of the sudden. "What do you have in mind?" Kenshin looked at me and knelt in front of me. My eyes poured and mixed together with his. Oh, such beautiful eyes. "We should pretend we are going out."

I silenced myself for a few minutes. Am I hearing this correctly? Was he saying we should be together? Hey, that actually made sense. Then we won't have to pretend that ... hey!!!!!! He is not only gorgeous, but utterly a genius. "You are a genius!" I clamped my hands to my mouth my eyes wide. "But, that would be even weirder!"

Kenshin stared at me disbelievingly, "what are you talking about?"

"Well, first of all if you haven't noticed it yet, you are a hottie in the school! Every single girl in that school wants to be your date!" I exclaimed.

"So?"

"So, it will be weird if a hottie decides to go out with a geek!"

Kenshin again started at me disbelievingly, "what is the matter with you? One solution, many problems solved. We don't have to pretend that a dangerous guy is after you and being a good boyfriend I can protect you. Also, also, the rumor about you being lesbian is out of the way! Plus, plus, I don't have to worry about giggling girls trying to get to me! IT ALL MAKES PERFECT SENSE!"

I didn't answer him for a minute and it did take a while for me to take everything in. "And I want to help you. It will make my job easier if we do that."

I inhaled again and again trying to calm myself. Yes, maybe he was right. Maybe this is the perfect way to get all problems solved. But I am so afraid of this one fact, I may fall in love with him. There is always a way for the love blind thing to come my way and I have already been blinded once, I didn't want another.

I sighed, "Yes, okay, let's do it. Just, don't take it too seriously."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, don't get too close."

He laughed, "You think I'll do something to you?"

No! The other way! "Yes, and I would like you to know, that I am a hard to get person."

"And I am known as super indulgence seducement hottie guy. You just have to be careful!"

And that's when things started to get giggly again. How wonderful it is to have another boyfriend, who, by the way, probably has no feelings for me. I probably should just let low, be a good actress and pretend that what I feel about him is nothing more than a friend. A hot friend if I might add. I sighed and walked to "our" apartment. This may be a good idea or even a bad idea. I really didn't know, but you never know unless you find out.

* * *

Yo yo yo!!!!! Tomorrow I am finally in school! How wonderful is that? I was being sarcastic by the way. Lolz! Isn't this a pretty long chappie? Haha, I can't really wait for the "next" chapter. And things will start to heat up for those yelling LEMON!!!!!!!! But that doesn't mean that the next chapter WILL be a lemon.

But what will really make me happy are your thoughts about this story. Please pretty please with a cherry on top and chocolate fudge press the damn blue button and type!!!!! Won't take you seconds anyway!

Also for those people who added me as your author watch list thank you so much. I just want you to write some reviews so I can get to talk to you. Please please!!!!!! And for you guys who put me down as your favorite author I am sooooo grateful. I am at your mercy!!! Lolz. Jk jk jk... see ya in the next chapter.


	9. painful yet strong

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 9: painful yet strong, _edited_**

Okay, before I continue, I just wanted to say sorry for this chapter. It took me a while before I realized I have been so into this story that I didn't recheck to see any mistakes. And when I did, omg, there are loads of them. So, sorry so many, many times!!!!! If you want to read again you can, it'll be best that way though, but if you want to that is.

OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG, which btw means "_oh my god_"! You guys are the best. There is no other way to thank you but to give you this new chapter as soon as possible. I am just one of those people who like to be complimented. And not just complimented in a "have to" way but actually mean it. And thanks to you guys I have finally finished eight chapters going to nine!!!!! (Giggles)

Vi3t BaBiI: lolz, keep em comin gurl and I'll give you more!!!!!

Anna: nice to meet you anna1 thanks for the review! Keep reviewing!

Never-Me-1213: that's a pretty cool name btw! wow, I didn't know that chapter was THAT funny. Did your mom actually heard you laughing? Oh thank you that u like it so much. I would like it so much too if you can continue reviewing!!!! Thanks, Jya!!!!

Kao-gurl: oh thank GOD you love it. go0od luck with your school! And keep reviewing!!!!!!

erica6060: oooo, a pleasure to meet you. You've got more!!!!! Here ya go! But you have to review again. Ha haha a...

legolasEstelstar: hey to you too! What's up gurl! Well, banana should be more appropriate with lemony scene, sweet and sour!!!!! Lolz, jkjkjk. Well, I don't think I'll allow such man to be your guy! Huahuahuahuahua evil laugh how come they thought you were a lesbian? That's pretty rude... I mean you're not right? ... Right? Anyways keep reviewing! Nice to hear from you!!!! Here's your chappie

j9482002: hahaha, you keep begging like a dog!!!! Thanks anyway! Keep reviewing and here's your next chapter!

* * *

Last chapter:

I sighed, "Yes, okay, let's do it. Just, don't take it too seriously."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, don't get too close."

He laughed, "You think I'll do something to you?"

No! The other way! "Yes, and I would like you to know, that I am a hard to get person."

"And I am known as super indulgence seducement hottie guy. You just have to be careful!"

And that's when things started to get giggly again. How wonderful it is to have another boyfriend, who, by the way, probably has no feelings for me. I probably should just let low, be a good actress and pretend that what I feel about him is nothing more than a friend. A hot friend if I might add. I sighed and walked to "our" apartment. This may be a good idea or even a bad idea. I really didn't know, but you never know unless you try it out.

* * *

Kaoru's POV

Yes okay, just as I expected, we were banned to go to school. I laughed in my mind about the fact that they can't call anyone to discuss my bad behavior. But Kenshin seems to have one.

Kenshin was pacing to and fro talking on the phone for the past hour with his mother, who apparently 'dislikes the idea that _he_ made a bad influence on an innocent girl who barely even skip for a pee in the wee.' The only thing that she didn't know is the fact that I am living with him. Kenshin's face pouted with a look of concern and concentration while talking on the phone. He said he will straighten this as soon as possible.

Then in the next minute he hung up and looked at me. I raised my eyebrows questioningly, and he smiled. I breathed a sigh of relieve. "Are you sure you like to go through that all the time?" I asked. He shook his head, "not the fact that my mother was yelling at me but the fact that I listen to her be so gullible. Sometimes it took me a couple of practices so I didn't have to laugh out loud. She is so funny."

I laughed heartily. "You know I've never done that in my life. Let's just say I was 'the' good girl." Kenshin smiled and nodded, 'of course you ARE."

Living with Kenshin had made my entire life change upside down. He is so charming and down to earth; his jokes may be annoying, but annoying fun. He made me laugh so hard I kind of choked on a piece of chicken. Was this his true self? Because I remembered the first time he came to this school was so cold and scary. Maybe he just didn't want the girls to go all over him again. Yeah, I though that was it.

I grinned at him as he tried to fill the silence by humming or drumming his fingers, or tried to read like what I am doing now but instead he dropped the book and glanced my way every now and then. He was bored, I can tell.

"I thought you said you like the thought of suspension?"

"Well! I thought I could sleep in but now that I have you in my room that thought just disappeared."

"Oh yeah? Well then, I think I'll just head out and walk and you can rest here."

He looked at me skeptically and took my hand before touching the door handle. I was trapped between him and the door. The corner was a bit dimmed and I was so relieved that the place was dark enough for him not to see my reddish blush.

"What about the 'danger' then?"

I gasped, "Oh, well, you don't need to worry about that."

"How come? He can be waiting outside right now and attempts to find ways to find you being alone!"

"He won't do that!"

"And how do you know?"

"Look! That was not the first time he tried to get me! I've been through this a couple of times and right now he won't have the guts to come out just yet. He's finding another plan. He won't be back soon." I held the door handle while saying, "I will be fine. It will be fine for me too if you would like to take a break and sleep."

Before I got a chance to say 'stop,' Kenshin opened the door, took my hand and ran out, with my hand, out of the apartment. He didn't say a word until we stopped at a nearby tree just a few meters from his apartment.

"Listen," he started, his beautiful red hair covered his lustful eyes at the heat of the sunset, the colors of his delicate skin shone wonderful tones and a sense of masculinity, "I said to you that I will guard you under your permission. When I heard your story, there is more that I want to protect. I have had the similar experiences as you have, and how much, for the first time in my life, do I not want to be lonely."

As I listened to his voice, it drowned me. I nearly cried. His solemn voice was filled with emotions and the difficultness of grasping the hope that he cannot reach. I was so captured at his face and his eyes; I nearly evoked myself to plunge into his loneliness and pull him out of it.

But he continued, "When I knew how lonely it was, I secretly wished, there was someone out there to help me. At least hear my story. And here is that person, a beautiful and interesting woman that has experienced more than anyone could imagine. I was deeply in love with a woman who did not love me. And you are a woman who was in love but----- Kaoru," he whispered my name. His eyebrows creased and I could see pity in his eyes.

"I don't need pity," I barely whispered. The gentle wind blew my raven hair across my eyes but my eyes blurred, tears were forming and I sniffed.

"Kaoru, you were in love and in pain. You are suffering a disgraceful suffering that you did not deserve!" Kenshin nearly yelled. My eyes blurred even more and a gigantic knot formed in my throat.

"Kaoru!" he yelled again, "I have been where you have been. I have felt your way of life. But mine is nothing compared to you! Don't live your life in agony when..." he stopped short when he noticed I was down on the ground, holding back tears that keep falling out. "... when you have hope..."

We didn't say anything after that. It took me a while before I get my composure back. But the tears kept flowing and my mind raced my chest and throat in a knot.

I undertood what he meant. HE was my hope. I forced myself to not believe it. I didn't want to have what I longed for and then taken away from me.

After a full tear flowing, I decided it was time to start speaking, "I have tried to be strong... I have tried to be strong for 3 FUCKING YEARS!" I yelled. But he didn't budge, Kenshin just kept his eyes focused on me. He knew I wasn't mad at him, that I was mad at myself. It was a mistake for me to grant his offer.

"I had Misao, she was a great person. I had a pole to hold on to, at least for these couple of months. But I didn't want to involve her any longer. She had suffered enough. She had put herself through my life and how wrong was I?" she stopped talking and sighed

Kaoru made another sigh and said, "I just don't want to have you worry me each day and night. And I'm not mad at you. You are a great person, wonderful to be exact and you have other things to worry about instead of me. I don't want you to suffer the way Misao have." My eyes were brimming in tears and I looked up at him properly, "I hurt Misao and how I was glad yet hurt when she left. I don't want to feel what I felt for Misao on you."

Kenshin eyes shone more than just deep thoughts, he was listening to me, and I felt glad. "And ... you came along... heard my story and pitied me." More than ever had I tried to gain my own pride with a man. Instead, I have dropped every single respect for myself and told the truth, "You wanted to help me because you pitied me... right?"

I whispered, "How much respect and pride do I have in my life... anymore?"

* * *

Kenshin's POV

She was broken and I was part of the cause. Looked so frail right now and yes, I had that feeling for her right now, pity. I understood. She had me. She was strong after all. But all I wanted to do was help her.

"Kaoru," I whispered delicately, kneeled in front of her, "you're right. You are a strong woman. I have pride in you. Now I understand completely. If you want to do this alone, I can back off.'

She didn't look up at me for a couple of minutes and when she did, I could just start punching myself in the stomach and hugged her as tightly as I can, forcing the pain out of her. There are no other words to describe her but a strong willed, motivated, and painfully suffered woman.

"Thank you," she barely whispered and dried off her tears.

I stood up and began walking back to my apartment. Then I stopped short and turned to look back at her. "But you have to know, that I wanted to help you not because I pitied you." Kaoru looked up at me, "I told you, you suffered. And I know how that feels. More when what I feel, was nothing compared to yours."

"I'll help with the packing," I said as I turned to my home, leaving a delicate flower drowned in a sunset ecstasy, filled with none other than those words that she hated most.

* * *

Kaoru's POV

The next day my eyes were bagged like black eye shadow. My mind was so blank when I noticed as I came in the door to the classroom that people were whispering, nudging and even pointed at me. Kenshin wasn't here yet.

I was confused. Were they talking about me? Their whispers became stronger and yet I still couldn't catch them. Unfortunately, someone just had to inform me.

"You cheap little whore!" Megumi stood in front of me and pointed her freshly cut French tip at me. "I didn't know you can be such a slut now Kaoru!" Megumi's voice boomed the whole classroom and everybody was silent. I stood still in front of her not knowing what to do. Her figure was taller than me and not to mention her face showed extreme anger.

"I don't know what you're saying?" I shook my head and frowned really not knowing what was up.

"Don't be so stupid. Don't even try to pretend. Where, may I ask, did you go with our young and wonderful Kenshin?" Megumi spoke through her teeth. She was so angry.

"Megum---," fortunately the teacher came in on time. And unexpectedly, so was he. We stared at each other as if we were in our own world. But we were disturbed by the sound of the teacher clearing his throat. The class saw it all, even the teacher saw it. It was unmistakable. Something between us happened, an unavoidable spark.

* * *

Kaoru's POV

The class bell rang and the teacher disappeared quickly. I had a hard time to stay awake. My eyes were so swollen. I needed to fresh myself out but I didn't get a chance to because guess who came to stop me at the door: Megumi.

"I saw that!" she retorted, "Don't try to get away here." I want to get away; I have no time for this.

"Megumi! This is so classical of you. There is nothing going on with---," "Then how do you explain the detention that you didn't attend to? And the suspension... and the fact that you SLEPT at his house!"

Her voice was loud and yes, everyone had stood still and listened. Could this get any worse?

"Megumi, how did you---," I wanted to ask but Megumi forced herself in, "You don't think I'll leave you alone with the thought that YOU and HIM so happens to not be at detention where you were suppose to be???!!!!! That you coincidently flunk detention with a HOT GUY!!!!"

Megumi's eyes were flaming red and I noticed too, a dozen or so girls that I noticed I hammered the name "giggly-push-over" surrounded me behind Megumi. Their eyes were unmistakably filled with anger. And for the first time I was scared at THEM.

"That is so not like you Kaoru! I thought you weren't interested." She raised an eyebrow and poked me with one of her fingers. "All of the sudden you changed your mind?? Oh ho, ho, ho that is so funny. And ironic!!! A goody girl decided to flunk detention. And come to think that is something that you have NEVER done before."

Without warning, Megumi pushed me hard from the door and I banged my waist against the edge of a table and screamed. A chair fell down and crashed loudly. I hit my funny bone against the chair, and a lot of pain worked up my waist sending me squirming with pain. I tried not to look too painful but I gasped as my head ached.

"Me and my girls decided to do some research. And now we realized what a cheap whore you have been. Secretly sleep at man's house. How cheap can you be??? Did he PAY you??" Megumi and the other girls laughed their asses off. But I found them chilly and so squeaky it send shivers down my spine: there goes a banshee.

Megumi glared at me and stood so close to my body that I could feel her anger and hatred aura passing through her veins.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Megumi frowned and looked behind her. There he was, standing behind her, his eyes shone a dark and dangerous glare. His aura turned deadly. I have never seen his face so calm but he washed the classroom with this unbelievably strong aura that sent jolts down your stomach.

Nobody moved, not even Megumi. I creased my eye brows in an attempt to message him to back off. But he stood still, stared at me and glared back at Megumi. "What did you girls do?" his voice was chilly and low but I could feel his tempo.

"Kenshin," megumi stammered but instead of backing off she slowly walked up towards him, "I was just saying to kaoru how bitchie and sluty she was for attempting to take advantage of you. But you seem to---"

Megumi couldn't continue because Kenshin walked slowly towards her, gave her a look and pushed her aside quite strongly that she flinched and held back the pain with a desperate frown and a tiny whine. The other girls hurriedly backed off.

Kenshin stopped short in front of me, but when I looked up to meet his face, his eyes had softened and he neared me in such a seductive way that I gave in to the moment. He took my hand and wrapped one arm around my waist, and pressed his lips against mine.

Everybody was shocked but not as shocked as me. Because his lips were so soft and full, other people seemed oblivious at the moment. My eyes closed and my mind was intensively crowded as I was so surprise that kenshin, kissed me, right then and there. There with a crowd of stunned students, and then, when I needed him so desperately.

* * *

There we go!!! A cliff hanger and an edited chapter nine!!!! SO HOW WAS IT?? The reason why he kissed her we will find out in the next chapter... so keep your heads up!!!!

Oh my god, I have to say, I cannot believe how much time I took to get this done. I was so worked up that I couldn't stop typing. Emotions are so full in here. Oh, just in case you didn't know, Kaoru didn't want another to suffer, that she was as strong as anybody else. That's why she declined Kenshin's offer.

PLEASEEEE again write a review for me. Keep my spirits high because reviewing is the only way. I am warning you... jk jk

Again for those who just read, I really want to hear from you! Write to me so I can get to know you!!! Thanks so much for reading anyway. I am truly grateful!!!!!

I'll be starting my new year and extended essay soon so wish me good luck! See ya in the next chappie!!!!


	10. a change in my life

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter10: A difference in my life**

Hey you guys!!! Sorry for the mixed up story. I was just sooo much into the story that I forgot about numbers and stuff that I've said in the past. Well... you guys have been great!!!!!! Sooooo great I want to cry myself to tears. But why I wonder why there wasn't as many as I expected? Where are you guys??? I'm also sorry I haven't updated this for quite some time.

First days at school were chaotic. I was just finishing the last touches for my art exhibition and man, I felt so exhausted. But I'm never exhausted for a piece of chappie!!! I was so sad when we had the bombing at the Australian embassy. Before the bombing I went to parties and got drunk (glug glug) I only drank two vodka s, one kahlua and one bailey. Phew.... Then I had a party at a hotel and got smashed with some champagne.... Indonesia is such a good place for partying; you can be 15 to drink...

N'ways... forget about me. Now on with the story!!!!!

Denny: oh my god, thank you for liking my story so much. I appreciate your comments!!!! Thanks a lot. Keep reviewing!!!

Reignashii: thank u again and again!!!! I know I corrected the kissing bit so u might want to read that again. hahaha...lolz!!!! Please keep reviewing!!! You'll find the real story later!!! (Evil laughter)

legolasEstelstar: wow you have got a long review for me!!! Thanks!!! Well, I'm sorry for making Megumi look like a bitch but you'll see why later (hi hi hi) well... if you didn't really understood the story, which I did thought was a bit complicated, better read it again cuz I've edited the story in some way or another. Well, living with a guy can be complicated at places there. Their culture is so different so I am technically being realistic here. Well, good that you love kenshin because I think you will love him more here!!! Hehehe. If you are seriously confused about the story, just email to me so I can personally give you info. Jya ne... keep in touch!!!

Kao-gurl: thanks!!!! She's not mad, just confused in a way. I've edited so read over if you must!!! Keep in touch!!!

erica6060: blushes thanks so much!!!! Now you've got the next chapter!!!! Stay reviewing!!!! Jya ne

KK4eva: bowing thanks for Ur support!!!! I thank you so much!!!! Well, now that you can review, keep reviewing!!!! I'll be waiting ne!!!!

Vi3t BaBiI: lolz!!!! Thanks... so I just have to say... 'Keep in touch' hehehe

Battoussaifriends: if you need more I'll give you more!!!! Just keep reviewing and get on touch with me!!!1 messing out ur name?? What happened?? I'm back, so read and enjoy!!!

j9482002: I am I am I am, just your support is regarded high!!! So don't hesitate to come panting for more!!! LOLZ!!!!! Jk jk jk

So please... you know what you can do to me!!!! Keep those reviews comin!!!! You know how fast my stories come right??? Well... now that I have school everything seems to be slowing. But keep checking EVERYDAY!!!! Well... not everyday but two days... or three.... Or whatever... just keep checking!!!!!

* * *

Kenshin stopped short in front of me, but when I looked up to meet his face, his eyes had softened and he neared me in such a seductive way that I gave in to the moment. He took my hand and wrapped one arm around my waist, and pressed his lips against mine.

Everybody was shocked but not as shocked as me. Because his lips were so soft and full, other people seemed oblivious at the moment. My eyes closed and my mind was intensively crowded as I was so surprise that kenshin, kissed me, right then and there. There with a crowd of stunned students, and then, when I needed him so desperately.

* * *

Kaoru's POV

He kissed me

OMG

He kissed me

OMG

He kissed me

After thousands of repeated 'he kissed me,' his lips separated from mine. It was not even a minute kiss. It was more like a peck if you asked me. But long enough for me to respond and deepened the kiss. Oh my god, his lips are nothing like I ever imagined. Sweet and minty, kind of like after taste of licked candy... woops... I didn't think that was an appropriate thing to say. I meant to say, his lips are so full and soft, sweet seductive, and intoxicating mint.

But it was all over, because by the time I opened my eyes, all I can see were his luminous eyes. So filled with emotions I couldn't count. He resembled an angel as he passed his hands down my arms. But he let go and I felt quite disappointed. However, the part where I come back to reality is offset unimpressive.

Everybody was quiet and I could hear the buzz and some chattering of the students outside the classroom. But inside the classroom was dead silent. I couldn't move. I was speechless. I had no words to say. And worst, neither does he.

Eventually someone would speak up right? Right? Well, apparently, no! I had the clumsiest situation of having to stand solidly still for a couple of minutes. But after that guess who spoke?

"She's my girlfriend," Kenshin turned upon Megumi and she shuddered at the anger that is flowing around him. "I cannot believe someone like you would do something like that. Megumi, I'm disappointed at you."

Kenshin took my arms and oh my, I felt like I was going to drop down right there because his heat pressurized my knees to weaken. But I let myself get dragged. Megumi had to stumble aside for Kenshin and me to pass through. But then he stopped at the doorsill and turned his head towards the whole class, "if anyone tried to hurt _my_ Kaoru, you will have to face me."

* * *

Kenshin's POV

I had been angry before, and when I do, it is a sight that nobody should see. I may have uncontrollable anger that just runs through the family. Many people had to be careful when they say things and they know not to mess with me. One time they called me 'battosai,' which applies to the supreme and terrifying swordsman who will kill anybody that gets in his way. He was coldhearted and for some reason, that shouldn't be applied to me. Well, not in my opinion anyway.

If I was cold hearted, why did I save a girl that is being cornered by a group of girls? I was so in deep with her that unconsciously, my mind races my pulse and an urge to protect her spread through my veins. She was always in my head, no matter what I do; she will always be in my mind.

That is why I saved her. Something deep within me stirred like the night awakens. My urge to keep her in my company made my body tingle. Just like her... Tomoe... but now I don't feel that way anymore for her. She was long gone from my head. And thank GOD for that because if she is still on my brain I would die to pieces.

And now, I have a different woman to approach to. I have set my task to protect this woman and I am not going to back down. I would not pass down an offer to protect someone that I have strong feelings for. No matter how much it hurts not to tell her.

So after the scene in front of all my friends... well, so called friends, I took her to the garden, the place where we connected in such a way that my memory just couldn't disperse it. The sun was shining and the birds are chirping. What more would it be than to enjoy this life as it is?

We stopped underneath the tree and Kaoru was able to breathe and choke at the same time. Her face red with anticipation and I could feel her hot body even though we are only inches apart.

She started to speak, "Kenshin," but I shushed her and let a minute of peace go by. Her face becomes softer and she relaxed.

"I'm sorry about that," I said and she didn't say anything, "I'm sorry I kissed you. It was improper for me to do. And to think that men treat you this way. But you have to understand, there is just... something within me that makes me want to help you. I just couldn't back down seeing you getting hurt. It makes me angry. And when I am angry for someone... it's impossible for me not to get too close to that person. It's just the way I am."

A soft wind blew and tranquility spread the sunny day with emotions of love and hope. I was silent, waiting for her to say something. But she was in silence for the time. Her eyes were the eyes that made me weak and tense. I had to break the tension. It is too much for me to focus on.

"Kenshin," Kaoru started, "I feel like I have never felt before. Anger, pain, frustration, disappointment." I bent my head down slowly breaking our eye contact. "But at the same time," Kaoru sighed softly but I didn't tilt my head up, "I feel strong, confident and I can feel the ray of hope shining through your eyes."

At this I smiled meekly and approved her eyes with a small electrifying eye contact. Yes... I could feel this sensation passing through my entire body and center itself into my eyes, where it can only disband when my eyes meet the eyes of that special someone. It was her... and she felt it.

"I cannot believe how much a man you are. How much you want to be close to someone so much that you forget everything around you." Kaoru's eyes started to twinkle and soon I could feel my eyes burn. Something deep within me stirred and I took kaoru's hand and brought her to a passionate hug. I buried my head between her shoulders and hold her tightly. She gasped but settled down and brought her own arms to hold me. I sighed deeply and motioned her body to mingle with mine, until her body softened and felt comfortable against mine.

* * *

Kaoru's POV

Is this what happen when you break and someone put together the thousand pieces that flied around? Is this the feeling when someone cares for you? Is this the feeling when, just when you knew your life is unnecessary that you nearly made a mistake?

I think so....

Because I knew how those felt, when he pulled me into an amazing embrace. His body burned. I could feel my cheeks growing red as he pulled me even tighter. I was solidly weakened. His emotions killed whatever that's negative out of my mind. This feeling never left me even as we broke our special hug. His emotions kicked my fears and brought an everlasting hope into my heart. And I knew just then, just how much I do not deserve him.

As we walked down to his apartment, I noticed how different his hands felt as he held my hand. It felt nicer, softer. I giggled. It must be so fortunate for someone to care for you so much. Can I believe him? I hope so... because I do... I totally do... have strong feelings for him.

How many more months until he decided to unprotect me anymore? I asked myself as the gate to the apartment cleared. Will I miss him? Will I cry for him?

Those questions seemed to be oblivious to him, I think. He may not even consider this. But my heart raced and my mind blanked, the pulse around my body started to pump a lot harder. I know this feeling. I know this very well. I stopped in my tracks and Kenshin didn't need a minute to realize that something was wrong. He knew it. He could feel. He could feel his aura and presence somewhere around us. I was traumatized and quivered. My eyes focused vacantly to the ground as I adhered on his hands tighter.

We both knew this feeling

We both can feel it

I know he's here. And I know for certain, that something big is going to happen...

* * *

Cliffhanger!!!!!! HUAHUAHUAHUAHUHAUHA!!!!!! Am I evil???? YES YES YES YES YES... ho hoho

But I am so sorry for giving you only this much from two weeks of not able to write more. I had a passive week and my mind is so full with work and stuff, you know the drill.

It is mean for me to party after the bomb, but it was a once in a lifetime chance!!!!! When else can I get invitation to a birthday party that I know will be a blast!!!! I had a great time!!! Better than the one at grand Hyatt ballroom (my best friend's sweet 17)

Please guys click on the blue button and spread your thoughts onto that screen!!!! Type type type!!!!! I hypnotize you!!!!1 until next time!!!! Arigatooouuu!!!! Jya ne


	11. Surprise

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 11: Surprise---**

Konichiwaaaaa!!!!!! Hey you guys!!! What's up???!!!!! Hehehehe...well, I may need some time to write the next fic because of the upcoming week!!!! It's been so full and I kind of need the concentration for the week. I won't have time one the weekends because I will be going on a residential. Lolz.

But I have to say... I won't start the next chapter if I don't get at least 15-20 reviews in the next 1 week because I will feel guilty for leaving the story behind. But if only some are interested, I don't feel like continuing too soon. So please guys, I beg you with chocolates and all the nice things you like... write a review for me!!!!! THANKS!!!!!!!!!! I'm sorry to pressure you guys in a way... but please keep my hopes up!!!!!

Vi3t BaBiI: you like it? Great then... I am ready for this chapter!!! Thanks! Keep reviewing!!!!

KK4eva: oh really? Why don't you write then? What's wrong with your other name? The name doesn't matter right? Please keep reviewing! I know you will!!!!

j9482002: aaaahhhhhh!!!!!!! No suicidal attempts please!!!!! LOLZ that's a scary way of expressing yourself ha ha ha... But never fear because I am here as long as you are here. Keep reviewing!!!!!

kenshinlover2002: gomenasaiiii!!!!! But I do love the fact that you can't wait for the next chappie!!! Hehehe... keep those reviews coming

Kao-gurl: see!!!!! I have updated especially early!!!!! Hehehe... so glad you hear the same. Anyway! Think positive!!!! I love your reviews!!!!!

Seta'sgirl: hey!!!!! Nice to meet ya! Thanks for the support, hope you enjoy this chapter and continue reviewing!!!!!

samuraiduck27: lolz... Hey nice to meet you. Thanks soooo very much!!!!! I wasn't really confident with that chapter but keep reviewing to keep me up and up!!! THANKS!!!!!

Ex-Alfonservar: Hi nice to meet you!!!! Thanks!!! Keep reviewing!!!!

Mika: Hahaha… thank you for your review!!! Come again !!! keep reviewing and it was nice to meet ya!!!!

Darkfirechild: Wow!!! Thank you so much!!!! I really appreaciate that. You know one of the things that I thought I was so weak at is my grammar. Yeah yeah I know… I sux. But by writing , practice makes perfect. But I really really am grateful for your review!!! Please come again… hehehe

RYOKOHAYAMA: Hahahahaha…w ell, I have to say I had trouble doing that. Probably because I read to much shakespear and stuff for my world liteature essay. Hahahaha… thanks for telling me. I kind of like the fact of symbolism. It makes it more indirect. Hahahaha. I don't know whats the good of that but I like it. thanks… keep reviewing!!!!

Reignashii: Kaoru died???? Hahahaha…. I didn't think that's what you meant. Well… I don't think I am going to pass the subject of Kaorus mom's death but I am pretty sure they are not poor. Its one of the things when you have everything and then it was taken from you and all that is left is that one memory. But the sketch book was hers. It was her art sketchbook. All art students need them… hahahaha… thanks so much!!!1 keep reviewing!!!!

* * *

Last chapter:

Those questions seemed to be oblivious to him, I think. He may not even consider this. But my heart raced and my mind blanked, the pulse around my body started to pump a lot harder. I know this feeling. I know this very well. I stopped in my tracks and Kenshin didn't need a minute to realize that something was wrong. He knew it. He could feel. He could feel his aura and presence somewhere around us. I was traumatized and quivered. My eyes focused vacantly to the ground as I adhered on his hands tighter.

We both knew this feeling

We both can feel it

I know he's here. And I know for certain, that something big is going to happen...

* * *

Kaoru's POV

I froze in my steps

Something within me awakens

I feel the pulse in my veins rapidly accelerating

Even as I held my hands to his arms, I couldn't feel the ground. He was here. Yes. He IS here. And I know discouragingly, that something big... something really big is going to happen.

Kenshin stopped in his tracks as well and he automatically wrapped one hand around my arm and took a step in front of me to shield me with his body. He towered above me and I just held on to the back of his shirt really tightly. Drops of sweat poured twinkle down my forehead making my fringe wet and sticky. I could feel the muscles beneath his shirt contract and he heavily tensed the air with hot steaming aura. It just seems to me that his aura would be dark and heavy when 'he' is around. So we must have the same person in mind.

I noticed his eyes scanned the area. His grip tightened and he turned his head when he heard the rustle of trees near the entrance to the apartment. He positioned himself for an attack.

The tree rustled again, but all was black.

Then we heard a whimper and someone staggered from behind the shadows and nearly fell. I gripped tighter than ever. He was ready too.

Out came a person quite clumsily walked onto the dim lights of the streets. That person was blocked by partial dim lights that we could barely see if it was even him. The person rested its hand on the tree and its back still slumped.

I took a deep breath and held it. I was nervous. I was so dead anxious. I was edgy and tense. But something caught my eye. I saw that person well as the person walked slowly into the light and stood on two legs properly before....

'Megumi?'

The girl with the long dark hair glanced up quite nervously and Megumi's eyes bored into mine. I escaped a choke.

"Meg----," before I could continue, Megumi ran to me and somehow managed to regain some kind of pressure that I could see well was in her eyes, held my arms with her both two cold shaking hands. She was looking at me quite strangely and then there was a pause. Kenshin looked at me and then her strangely before I finally got the message that she needed to tell me something.

I nodded at Megumi and told Kenshin to be excused. He understood and took a pace back but his distance is still close enough to look closely for any disturbance.

"Megumi..." I started. She was shaking. Her body was trembling and in her hands held a can of beer. It was empty, and damaged this way and that. Megumi's eyes were sort of rimmed. Her hair plastered to her forehead and for the first time in my life have I been this scared to see her so frightened.

"Kaoru..." she whispered in a rusty voice and hiccupped, but her face showed great misery, "Kaoru... why are you always the person?" I was confused and I creased my eyebrows.

"What are you...?"

"I am saying... why are you being watched?"

I froze.

"Why is Kenshin always by your side?"

I couldn't speak.

"Has he been trying... to protect you?"

I was scared. I was so afraid. The tension puts too much pressure on my shoulders. My knees are weak.

"Kaoru... why are you being protected?"

Silence

"I don't have much time to speak. But I do know that someone is looking for you. And that person... even though he is way out of my league... pressured me!" she laughed nervously. Then she started walking around me, but I stood still. My eyes are frozen rooted to the ground.

"You know what he said to me?" Megumi snorted as she kicked the dirt off the ground, "He said that I was beautiful (Snickered hotly). He said I was a smart person too."

Megumi took the can of beer and tried to drink from it. But nothing came out. It was empty. She hiccupped and threw the can at me. I was shocked as I looked at her.

"You also know what he said?" Megumi whipped her mouth with her red shirt, "He said that I was empty. Empty like that FUCKING CAN!"

Kenshin jerked and I signaled him to stay put. I know megumi. She is drunk. And when she is drunk, she can be a little preoccupied with fantasies. I glanced at her worriedly. What had her expression meant? She was acting all strange. She was scared and frightened at first. Then now she became all... jumpy.

"Megumi, you're drunk!"

"I am NOT drunk!" she screamed and the whole place went silent. She sobbed and dropped to the ground. It worried me that she is not acting herself.

"I made a mistake." She paused a second or so, 'I made the biggest... most stupid... mother fucking ASS mistake! I am just a toy in his eyes! A FUCKIN toy! Why did I sleep with him ... why? And now that I have made my mistake I must repay it. Somehow... or another."

She was blinded by emotions. She must have done something very wrong to put her at this state. Her personality is shone way below what I had expected from her. But this must be something big to have her all emotional. She was sad, angry and scared at the same time. It reminded me of me.

Megumi hiccupped again and put one hand on my shoulders, and with her slumped body, neared me. She brought her mouth near my ear and whispered, "You are in grave danger. You must not be here. Trust me... runaway... while you still have the chance..."

Then with a surprising sigh, Megumi dropped to the ground and laid there motionless. I was stunned. Kenshin ran up to my side and groaned.

"Kenshin we must help her. She is not being herself. She needs a home." Kenshin looked at me skeptically, "Her mother works nightshift and comes home early in the morning. I'll leave her a note to stay that she is staying with me."

Kenshin didn't argue but he looked at me in a way that made my eyes tingle. His body was like a magnet. I feel like I was drawn to him, attracted in some form. He was being serious and I was happy he did.

He picked up Megumi with one swift motion and ran upstairs. I sighed. I thought something big WAS going to happen. But the air is still chilly, soft wind rustling the trees. I wonder how I came up with that aura. The sense that he was here, it made me chill like a frightening plague. But... I stopped in my tracks. I was alone in the night. Kenshin is probably upstairs by now. The full moon is shining through the clouds. I was chilled. The night seemed less frightening and I started to walk to the gate.

As I passed the huge tree I heard a twig snap.

Surprised, I turned around but I didn't get to see anything, because someone strong pulled me back and took hold of both my arms and covered a thick cloth over my mouth. I wanted to scream. There is that aura again. The aura of... 'Him.'

Shocked and scared to death, my scream was stifled with the piece of cloth that that strong hand is holding my mouth with. It has something strong in it, and before I knew it, it went into my lungs as I tried to breathe for air. Its strong particles made my whole body quiver and weakened instantly...

Then...

It was all black...

* * *

Kenshin's POV

Where is she? I wondered. She should be here by now. I glanced at Megumi who was sleeping at the couch safe and sound. Her eyes still puffy, I couldn't believe what I saw. How can Megumi be that chaotic? Something happened to her that I know is none of my business. What I am most interested in is the fact that she came to kaoru whom, I thought she hated, to talk to.

The sound of Megumi's snore surprised me. I was suddenly alert. I felt deep down inside me something is not right. Where is Kaoru? Without a glance at Megumi's droll, I stormed past the door and ran as fast as I could down the stairs. My heart beating rapidly, I squeezed the tension that is wrapped around me.

As soon as I pass the gate I screamed Kaoru's name. I heard nothing. Everything was silent. The only respond was the silent gush of wind. Sweat dropped. The wind was chilling but I was sweating. Where is she?

I yelled her name over and over again. I ran to the right then back again, calling out her name. Nothing came to pass. Everything was silent. I was scared. She was gone. And I have a clear view of who is all behind this.

I ran up the stairs as fast as my leg could carry. And up there was an empty sofa. Megumi was gone. She must have ran when I was worried that I forgotten that the door was left open.

I yelled to myself. I was furious. Red heat spread the room. The temperature is rising. I was mad. I was furious. I had to do something.

Trying to calm myself down, I focused my energy. My emotions calmed and tried to think of a solution. First, I had to find Megumi. Track her down and get any information whatsoever. Secondly, if that plan doesn't work... then it's up to the police now. This is getting serious. This is utterly harassment. I need to find Megumi. And fast...

* * *

May I just say that this story may seem a little confusing to you. But basically Kaoru's is kidnapped. And of course you guys have a clear view of who is behind this? Yeah... well... I don't want to say anymore.

Next chapter will be out soon unless that is I get to have 15-20 reviews. If not I'll wait a little longer then. I have so much to do. It's just hard to keep up with my fanfic when all I have is... no free. But I am truly grateful that you guys have kept to the story and I really appreciate it. A big thank you to you!

But to you guys who are waiting for a 'lemon,' well I am assuring you it will come 'soon.' And when I mean soon, 'soon.' But maybe a little lime would do first right? Hehe... am I so evil??? Mushy stuff and loads of fluffiness will come your way!!!!!!!


	12. How she tells the story

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 12: The beginning to an end**

May I first give one big and yes, huge, apologizes for the late update…. Actually, very late. Well, I have given myself a smack in the head and got back to work. You know why right? It's called work and exam!!! I haven't been updating regularly cuz ive been partying with my new bf… hahahaha!! Yay me!!! This time… I know what to write when I have to write lemons... hihihihi

Oh my! I cannot believe how many reviews I have got in my first day! I am so proud. Thanks so much you guys! This is just great. I like it, I like, I like, I like! Lolz. Well, keep up the great reviews and please do not hesitate to ask me any questions. Or anything that confuses you! Thanks again!

Now I am thinking, what kind of fic is this again? Drama and romance. Well, there is a bit of drama. Right? Hehehe… I need u guys to consider this. Do you think I should change it? Or keep it the way it is? Oh, I want a catchy sort of summary, if you guys could help me on that. Or is that catchy enough? Usually readers are interested when they read the review.

samuraiduck27: thank you. Yes… I think so. He is so gonna kick his butt. Hahaha. Well, thanks so much again for the review!!!! Here I have updated. Keep in touch

ChaOsViViRaiN: well you know what? I don't mind if you keep reviewing!!! If you think that the post is too long and no body has said anything, I would welcome your review!!! Thank you! Nice to meet you!!! Keep reviewing!!!

Vi3t BaBiI : hehehe evil laugh well, the question you asked will be answered in this chapter. Thanks! Keep reviewing!!! See ya laterz!!!

j9482002: your reviews are so unique!!! I will, and here it is!!! Hahaha… thanks for the review!!!! I don't know if addiction is a good thing but I'm happy that you like and understand the story!!!

Reignashii: sorry bout that. You know I see how confusing the beginning of the story is compared to this story. But I assure you to not worry because her past won't be talked later in the story. So I'll make sure that by the time kaoru's past do come up, I will make sure it IS and up most reasonable and accurate… hehehe… thanks for your attention!

My Name Is R.C: Hi!!!! Nice to meet you! What a long review! Lolz, well thank you so much for supporting me! Well, you will find out what is gonna happen to them soon. And here it is!!! Thank you again! And the questions!!! Well, let's just say it will be answered in this chappie! Thanks a whole loads

Kao-gurl: don't worry about updating as long as you keep reviewing! Thank you so much and keep on, yes gurl, keep on reviewing!

Pixel-the-evil-fairy: hey! Thank you so much and nice to meet you! Keep reviewing!

Seta'sgirl: thank you! Just keep on reviewing and your questions will be answered here! Hehehe. Thanks loadies.

Immortal-Blood: omg, you are like, the second one to have one negative impression on my story. And I am grateful for that by the way. I do agree that the beginning to my story is just one heck crap. I just hope that I'll improve later on which I did… hahahaha... Thanks btw, and keep reviewing!!!!

PersianRurouni: why thank you!!! Keep coming back and review!

Alfonsie: soooo soooorrryyy!!!! I have sooo much to do... Seriously! and here is your story!

Shy-me-95: thanks!!! Arigato!!!! Hehehe… keep reviewing!

Pvt Day: aww, I was hoping for a long review! Hehehe, thanks for the review!!!!

Kpxiceboi: heya! Nice to meet you and thanks for the review! Keep reviewing!

Fat Panda: awww, what a cute name! Well thanks sooooo very much for the review. sigh sometimes I read back the stories that I have done and maaan, did I made a lot of mistakes. Thanks anyway, all great! Hahahaha. Keep reviewing!

KK4eva: well, I think you should just continue with your stories as usual. Sometimes when you have an interesting idea, stick to it and keep on advancing to the idea. But sometimes when you just make the story as you go, you'll get one of those writer blocks. Man, I hate those. Right now, I have tried to keep planning my writing, looking over at it again… or have someone reading it to make sure it made sense. I'm all positive on you!! Thanks for the review!

Sorry if I haven't feedback all Ur comments. I just want to finish all this chappie up so u won't be all mad at me. Thank you so much!!!!!

Okay, for this next chapter I have made a special treat for you. I have made is especially longer! I hope it will satisfy you! Hehehe. I encourage you to keep on reviewing. It is the best sort of thing that has happened in my life!

Last chapter:

I ran up the stairs as fast as my leg could carry. And up there was an empty sofa. Megumi was gone. She must have ran when I was worried that I forgotten that the door was left open.

I yelled to myself. I was furious. Red heat spread the room. The temperature is rising. I was mad. I was furious. I had to do something.

Trying to calm myself down, I focused my energy. My emotions calmed and tried to think of a solution. First, I had to find Megumi. Track her down and get any information whatsoever. Secondly, if that plan doesn't work… then it's up to the police now. This is getting serious. This is utterly harassment. I need to find Megumi. And fast…

Kaoru's POV

As I awoke with a jerk, I cursed. My head spun so tightly and I was blinded by shiny stars. Oh, how much my eyes wanted to pop. It took me a minute to regain my eye sight. But for that moment, I kind of wished that didn't happen.

Yes, I do not know what is going on. First, there was Megumi, all washed up with emotions. Then I was forced by someone and then I fell unconscious. And now I am in an empty room, on a bed, with a stream of sunlight passing through a rotten window. My hands and legs are wrapped so tightly with ropes. The bed sheets were torn and the walls are all filled with graffiti, I could almost choke of fright. And the floor is made of old cement. What a place. There is no furniture in any place at all in the room. The air smelled of rotten fish. What a nightmare!

The door suddenly opened and in came the most hated person in the world. The one and only person that made my life happy and a living hell all at once. I glared at him, angry for what he had done to me. This has gone far enough. He has passed the line. Nothing, and I mean nothing, could make me forgive him.

His bright smile hooked to his frail looking skin of his face, as if admiring his catch. There shouldn't be a reason for me to be sick. But his gaze still ponders upon me. His silvery locks dangled above his eyes. His acute eyes, that sends shivers down my spine. His eyes looked worn out. As if he had not slept for days. It was touching how much worn out he looked. But what matters now is getting the freaking hell away from here.

"Yukimura Kensuke!" I wanted to yell. But anger draws my words in me and made my body more heated than it could handle. I was shaking. Not with fear but with passionate anger, one of those kinds where it is too hot to handle.

'My, my, sweetie pie. You look so heated.' Yukimura stood before me and I knew he had the power over me. His voice was raspy. He really does look worn out. But his towering figure portrays the dissolute man he had become, the one man that had changed my life. I nearly cried, but he was too good for it.

Suddenly, Yukimura bend down low, and looked at me straight in the eye. 'There is only one way to get to you,' he spoke in a small tone, barely a whisper, 'that one way is the hard way, and you should know this by now.'

I can tell he is up to something. And I am too frightened to even think about it. He was too close, too close to my face. I had to keep a straight face but failed miserably. There is something in his eyes that makes me weak. And by GOD how much I hate him for that.

But the most frightening thing of all is his hand stroking my face. It was an immediate impulse. My body went rigid. He didn't stop. But his other hand snaked up my thighs and that was when I cried. I was in tears. I was so alarmed and it staggered my barrier of strength that it went crumbling down into millions of filaments. It was crumbling so fast all I could do was cry as he still continues to roam his hands all over my body.

He, on the other hand, was taking pleasure in every moment of it. He was smiling his most horrendous blotch of a smile that just about made me heave right there and then. I was lost in fright. I tried to kick him with all my power in fright and disgust. In attempt to free myself from his roaming hand, all he did was to easily pin my hand together and made a big slap on my face…

There it was. I have lost. My pride and dignity have been stamped wrecked. I was officially immensely degraded… And most horridly… by him. My body became immobile as my cheek burned hot from his gruesome hand that was once unsoiled and soft. Those eyes too. Those eyes that brought my life into a light atmosphere, but now, right now, made me drop dead to the ground. The force of gravity seemed larger than ever. My body breaks. I have lost.

Kenshin's POV

I ran to her house. She is the only clue!

Megumi's house was small and very dark. I searched among the dark street. The only single light was the blurred lamp casting not enough rays to light even one house. Sometimes I wonder if this place should be used as a haunted house. Pity washed over me. But I have to gather my strength to get all the information I need. I slammed on the door. Yelling and calling her name, I didn't care. She didn't answer. Where could she be? I tried the door knob…. Surprisingly it turned. Was she in? Kaoru said her mother works nightshift. There shouldn't be a reason to leave the door unlocked. Well, despite her drinking temptation she might have forgotten to lock the door…. Or did she?

I silently crept into the solemn and daunting house. There were no lights. But I didn't call for her name. I searched to her small living room. There were only two bedrooms, small enough to be a closet. Nothing there.

I was curious. I was mad. I was confused, because for the first time, I felt so helpless. The one person that I want to protect is the one person that I cannot. But I can't just lose hope like this. Where is the spirit of being me, a battousai!

I stopped suddenly when I heard a small sound. It was barely a sound. There were no words. But it sounded so much like a weep. I tried to locate the sound. I could hear water dripping. I glanced here and there. The sound keeps getting closer and closer. It came from a door, rotten and old. I could hear water trickling silently and there was a groaning sound, as well as an earth wrecking weep. It must be megumi!

'Megumi!' I yelled. The weeping stopped and I could hear rapid and panicked movement from the inside. She must be trying to lock the door in surprise. As fast as I can I went towards the door and slammed it open.

It was a bathroom. The air around smelled vaguely like excrement. It was small and damp. And the floor was wet. Megumi was standing. She was still wearing her clothes. But it was wet. Her face was like a ship wreck. Black mascara ran down her cheeks. Her eyes were of faint red. Her hair was wet and a mess. She was stunned to see kenshin, running out of breath, standing in her bathroom of her most humiliating house. She was speechless.

'Megumi,' I gasped out her name. I was breathless. I tried to breathe in but the smell made me puke. She was embarrassed. Her eyes were lowered and she sank to the ground. She looked so dazed. But I could see she was trembling. Her hands were shaking and on the floor I noticed a bottle of pills, spilled… what is going on?

'What…' I started, but Megumi started to sob and moan. The sound was awful. I couldn't bear it. I breathed a deep sigh and tried again. 'Megumi, what exactly are you doing?' she didn't answer, instead in reply she doubled her painful moan and cries.

I tried to clear my head. I looked around the small bathroom. And in a flash, I noticed a kitchen knife, looking pretty sharp, in the corner of the room. I gazed hard at it, and then to the pills on the floor. That was when I came to my senses. This poor girl is trying to commit suicide. It was foul. Someone trying to kill themselves was too harsh. She must have a reason.

'Megumi,' I sat next to her, not daring to meet her eyes of hurt and misery, 'why?' For a few minutes she didn't answer. She struggled to give an answer, but I waited, patiently.

Finally she gazed up to the ceiling in an expression I could not figure. 'I guess…' Megumi started to speak in barely a whisper, her voice raspy and solid, as if she didn't have enough water to drink, 'I have to tell you the whole story.'

I was more than interested. She wanted to speak, and all I can do is to wait for her to start, and listen.

'Kenshin, I am some bitch. I sometimes pity myself… for not being myself. Trying to be someone else I guess is one of the things that I am most talented for.' She giggled sarcastically. I didn't, I waited for her to continue. 'Now that you see me, I don't even dare to ask what you think of me… I pretended so well… my life and all… it was all messed up.'

I tried to take this all in. but I couldn't understand. 'You see,' she continues, 'I was not wanted in this world. I was not accepted even in my family. My mother didn't even want me in the beginning… I was just a burden for her. We are wrecked. Our family is wrecked. We are a disaster. I wouldn't even call my fucking dad part of my fucking family. This is shit. Horrible things comes over us, none of which you can imagine.' She giggled again, this time nervously. 'Don't you worry, this stuff happens everyday, I'm sure of that. You know, when a family is wrecked because some misfit was born?'

Megumi jammed in her pocket to bring out a ruined and wet pack of cigarettes. She took one out and pushed it into her mouth as if her mouth had no muscles to hold the cigar. She tried to light her cigar, but her lighter was finished. She tried again, and again, and again, and again. Until she became so frustrated she slammed her lighter to the door. Then she started to cry again, softly and painfully. At one point I got tired of hearing her cries, partly because of kaoru, and partly because her cries painfully stitching each and every inch of my heart leaving trails of red blood around my whole body. But she needed someone. She was attempting suicide. And I know she has a story behind it. So I must stay put until she finally finishes.

'I despise you,' I could feel the anger within her tone of voice, 'you and that little Kaoru.' Megumi stood up and glanced down at me. I didn't look up to see her.

'Do you have ANY IDEA?' she yelled, 'Do you have any idea how much pain I have to go through? I have no one to turn to! If any of my friends figured out that I am just some bitch pretending to be someone I'm not, what then will they think of me? They would just turn their backs on me and pretend I don't exist!'

She dropped down again to the floor and sobbed while saying, 'I have a ruined family, a miserable life, I have no reality, and I live in a world of fantasy, hiding my real figure within my fucking dream… and…' she trailed off. I still didn't look up at her. I was scared to see what I will probably see.

Megumi was silent. I can still hear the water trickling and the sound of the clock ticking. Time is precious. But I had to listen.

'My life was pointless. And I just realized it…' she held my hand and I glanced to look at her. Curiosity flooding me and she held my hand as if in an attempt to be rescued. 'You must be wondering about this young silver head… don't you?' At this comment I froze.

'He was my lover. I was passionately, deeply in love with him. I was so in love with him, I would do anything to make him happy… even if it does break my self-respect.' I stared at her face. Determination flooded me. Oh my lord. Is she saying…? 'I would do anything. Yes? I even turned my back to a person who I once called a friend,' she continued, 'every single bit of information I could gather, I tell him.'

I was speechless. My body numb. I was so taken aback that I tried to push her hands away. She looked hurt. Her eyes started to water again, and she creased her eyebrows. Megumi dragged herself to the wall and hugged her weakened legs together while muttering, 'see! This is what happens! This is what you would get when you do these horrible things.'

I held my head with my hand. All this time, I thought, all this time has not only been HIM, but a person who was once… kaoru's friend.

'I HATE LOVE!' she yelled, sobbed and shook. 'Look what LOVE has brought me! I loved an enemy! And now that he already has the information, he turned his back on me! HE DOESN'T CARE! THAT FUCKING MOTHER FUCKER!' she wept and cried and yelled swear words. Her body went wildly around the place as she sat on the wet floor. 'He doesn't even care… about his… child.'

'What?' I surprisingly turned my head to look at her. Did she say…? 'I'M PREGNANT!!!' she yelled and stopped suddenly to cry. 'I stupidly believed him and when I told him I was going to have a child, in disgust he replied that he won't do anything for me. I was an empty can as I always was and that he could just THROW AWAY!'

Too stunned to say anything, I waited. I had no words.

'Maybe… if I'm not in this world… I don't have to suffer so much pain… I had enough.' her tears were flowing so easily, her eyes swollen and her face wrecked. Pity once again washed over me. I know how difficult this must be for her.

Finally, I spoke up, 'Megumi, no matter what, your life is precious! And the fact that you are going to bring another life into this world… is amazing!' she looked at me in ridicule, 'Kenshin, I don't, I don't, I don't, and I will never give birth to a child who will be the same bitchy me… I don't want to have a child who will suffer the way I did. To live life the way I do. And to be the person… I'm not…'

I took her hand this time and she looked up to me. 'But you can change that… you can make this newborn be the one person that you always wanted it to be. Do not, and I am saying this loud and clear, do NOT, give hope and lose to a one of a kind ASSHOLE who stole your first ever love. You can still make him look up to you, and make him return your self respect and dignity… Megumi, in one way or another, this is crime. You must not lose hope to someone, especially someone like… like… HIM!' anger was raised in my voice.

Megumi started to sob again… but this time less painful than it was before. I hugged her. She needed love. She misunderstood love, and that wretched silver head man has perfected so many lives… and yet has buried their perfected life into oblivion. I don't understand how someone like him even exists in this world. But I know there should be a way to stop him.

Kaoru's POV

I awoke with a startling jolt. Sweat was pouring from my body, my breathing was racing. I just had a nightmare. For a few seconds, I didn't realize my surroundings. But as soon as reality hit me, the same vast numbness spread all over my body. My hands and legs were not tied up anymore. But the red pain on my cheeks and all over my body still leaves its trademark. I was still in the same room, in the same atmosphere, but I didn't have the same aura. My body and soul… was black

Kenshin's POV

I stood among the dark trees. It was two hours past midnight and my body is immense in anxiety. Megumi finally took a hold of herself, and told me where I could find kaoru… _my_ kaoru…

And here I am, standing in front of a very small cabin, among the dark trees of a very large and deserted place. The only light shining was the moon, and I pray the moon to help me shine my way. I need all the help I could get. I have to avoid a fight, any fight. Fighting does not meet my standard. However, if I do meet a battle… then I know what I am fighting for.

big huge laugh… you know… I cannot believe it took me, how many weeks? Like a whole year to finish this bit. But actually I've done this in like… three days. Sorry if this story is not long enough and does not have squeezy scenes. I didn't intend it to be like this but I hope the next one there will be… I think… lolz

Ooh… please come and visit my deviant art gallery at I have fan arts there as well, just to check out on my other creative side wink

Have a nice holiday everybody!!!!! Beach!!!! Here I gooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!

Merry Christmas and a happy new year!!!!!


	13. Yearning to be free

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 13: the heat of vengeance**

Hey you guys I'm back… I am so tired and full of shit that I am not gonna say anything more than just 'sorry for the late update' and 'enjoy my fanfic!'

Oh wait, I do have something to say. You guys thought that she was raped? Well… I did say in the story that her body and soul was black but I didn't say that she was raped. Anyway, I won't spoil the fun and I am hoping that the lemon would come soon. wish, wish

Btw… I have updated, I mean, edited most of my first few chapters and you guys might want to take a peak at my new chapter and see how I have edited it. I think I have changed the plot a bit but ill try to cope and connect everything together.

­

Kenshin's POV

I stood among the dark trees. It was two hours past midnight and my body is immense in anxiety. Megumi finally took a hold of herself, and told me where I could find kaoru… _my_ kaoru…

And here I am, standing in front of a very small cabin, among the dark trees of a very large and deserted place. The only light shining was the moon, and I pray the moon to help me shine my way. I need all the help I could get. I have to avoid a fight, any fight. Fighting does not meet my standard. However, if I do meet a battle… then I know what I am fighting for.

Kenshin's POV

I was silent behind the bushes as I glanced at the rotten shack in front of me. My heart was beating so fast. I never knew that my time would come to take what was rightfully mine. I had been avoiding any fight or any battle since I came here. I have enough scars to last me a life time but as when I heard a painful scream, I winced, my heart gripping and knew that I had to save her no matter what the cost would be.

Finally, as silent as possible, I snaked through the bushes, tall grass and trees until I finally came to a window nearby. Glancing in for a second, I checked whether the room was safe so I can climb in. the room was dark and I could see nothing but dark shadows. I sighed and breathed in. slowly, I lifted the window and like a night crawler, I jumped in the room as silent and steady as possible.

I crept inside and waved my arms to find the door knob. I felt hard wood and pushed. The door creaked and I fell silent, wondering whether he had heard that silent sound. For a couple of seconds there was no sound, only someone whimpering.

_Kaoru, _I screamed in my head. _Hold on_

I opened the door again, only a few inches a part until I could see what was inside. I could see a small blurry light from inside and smell something rotten. 'Him and his rotten self,' I silently said to myself.

I opened the crack until it was wide enough for me to poke my head out. I could still hear Kaoru whimpering and crying in agony. Clutching the door knob tightly, I finally went through the door. I came to a long small corridor and I looked left and right. There were two doors on each side and I listened for her sound. It came from the left.

The floor creaked as I walked to the left. The wooden walls and floors were so rotten it felt like as if the whole place could collapse anytime soon. I came to the door, still murky in the night. As inaudibly as possible I rested my ear against the door and heard kaoru's voice. 'In here,' I thought.

'Shut up bitch,' someone yelled and heard a slap. She suddenly felt quiet. I was screaming in my head, anger rising in my chest. 'How dare he slap her' I screamed in my head. I tried not to groan but instead thinking of a way to get into that fucking room without him noticing.

I decided to take my chances and opened the door little by little. Inside the room, I could see the walls written with graffiti. There were no furniture, only a small lamp at the right corner of the room and a chair in the middle. I opened the door wider, trying to steal a glance. There she was in the middle of the room, leaning against the wall, her eyes closed as tears kept streaming down her dirty cheeks. Her clothes tattered and dirty and were ripped apart by evidence it was done by force. It smelt more like rotten flesh in there and I had to cover my nose as the smell became stronger, stinging my smelling senses.

I suddenly hid when I saw a figure moving. I closed the door, just slightly leaving a gap and checked again inside. It seemed that he's all alone, with no guardians to protect him. I wondered why. I can only see his back. He was resting his head against the wall just next to kaoru; his shadow from the light of the window was cast upon her. I frowned, thinking of a way to make a move. I had to get her out of here… soon.

Kaoru's POV

I was silent for a very long time. My breath seemed to slowly disappear. Lifeless, comatose, inert and motionless, I somehow lost hope of everything. Here I am, waiting for my prince to arrive. Seeing how secluded we were, I never had the strength so be so confident as to say that he will come to save me.

I closed my eyes again, my eyes felt numb from all the tears that drained from my eyes. I was exhausted. I didn't get enough sleep or food. Now my hands are tied again and he was still standing there, the one person who once made my life so wonderful and at the same time, a living hell. I was stupid to ever be with him. I was disgusted at myself for ever trusting and loving him. I was stupid to do that that my parents got hurt as well. I started to weep again. This commotion was too much for me and I had enough. I wanted to end this, I wanted to---

I shouted in pain and fell to the floor. 'Stop that fucking noise,' Yukimura bellowed at me and kicked his chair in frustration, 'your fucking weeping are not going to get you anywhere and its so fucking annoying to hear. Do you get me!' he stood just above me, I was cowering beneath him like a lifeless chicken.

I couldn't touch my cheek because my hands were tied up. So many times did he slap me and many times he did more than just torture. My body was aching and he left many trademarks on my skin, and especially, my heart.

I heard a door slam and as I lay down on the floor, motionless to do anything, I saw someone. He was in the shadows. It appeared as though he slammed the door wide open and so hard at that that the door flew to the other side of the room. I could feel his vicious aura, dangerous yet protecting. I know this feeling from somewhere, I spoke in my head. I tried to get more of him, only to gasp when he ran towards Yukimura and slammed him against the wall. Yukimura groaned in agony and tried to stand up when he started to kick Yukimura over and over on his stomach.

I tried to get up. I was too weak but I tried. I had to know whether it was him. The person stopped kicking Yukimura and fell silent.

'Kenshin?' I hopefully asked. He turned around and for a second there my heart stopped beating. It was him, I smiled in anticipation, and it was him.

'Kaoru—' he started but when I asked, it gave Yukimura time to grab Kenshin on the ankles and threw him down until he fell to the floor. Kenshin groaned in pain. Yukimura stood up and said, 'well, well, well, look who we have here.'

I gasped when Yukimura stomped Kenshin on the stomach and Kenshin yelped in pain. 'You little sons of bitches just can't get enough can't you?' Yukimura tried to stomp him in the stomach again, only to be blocked by Kenshin's hand. He pushed and Yukimura fell back.

'All I can say is that you are worth no more than a piece of shit,' Kenshin moved swiftly towards Yukimura and everything happened very fast. Kenshin kicked and punched and spun around until Yukimura fell to the ground in a heap. At last, Yukimura didn't get up, he was on the ground. Everything was silent.

I looked at Yukimura who was lying on the ground, motionless and then at Kenshin. I started to cry tears again. I was so happy to see him that I was too relieved to say anything. I chocked a smile; happy tears kept flowing and flowing. He was bleeding and as he came up to me, I was more than relieved to see that he didn't get any serious injuries. At least, not that I know of…

'Ken,' I started to say but he shushed me and told me everything was going to be alright. He was running out of breath and even though he tried to hide it but he was wincing in pain. I was so overpowered by happiness. I was smiling at him and he smiled at me back. But I looked behind him and saw Yukimura standing up and kicked Kenshin away from me until he hit hard on the ground. I yelled his name as he tried to stand up.

Kenshin tried to punch Yukimura on the stomach but he blocked it and instead made a spin and kicked Kenshin in the head with all his might. I tried to scream but all I could let out was a small shriek. Then I coughed, the flue has gotten to me. Kenshin tried to stand up, when Yukimura let out a huge blow on the head using his elbow. More tears came from my eyes as I witnessed Kenshin's beating.

I reached my hand towards him, but my body was lifeless. I couldn't move or budge. I was too weak. Kenshin got beaten more and more until finally he was down on the floor, trying with all his might to get up. More than ever in my life had I felt this helpless. All I could see was this young man's bravery and compassion to come to save me and all he ended up with was to be beaten by a person who was not even worth to mention.

I laid my head back to the floor, more tears came out and I felt could feel a deep cut within my heart. Yukimura spat at him and came to me. Dreadfully enough, he pulled out a small knife and pulled me up vehemently by the hair. I yelled in pain and stood up. He draped his arms and choked my neck. My hands were still tied to the back and my legs felt weak as he pointed the knife very close to my face.

Kenshin finally stood up, anger and flaming heat was rising from his body when he saw me. I wanted to tell him to just go away and not care about me, leave me alone and get the hell out of here. Kenshin stood in his place. He whipped blood from his mouth and spat, his eyes still locked to Yukimura's eyes. I shuddered when I felt his extreme aura, more powerful than before. Possibly more powerful than Yukimura's even.

'Get your hands off her' Kenshin said in a very low and cold voice. His eyes were fixated upon Yukimura as I could see his eyes burning amber flames.

'Oh yeah Kenshin,' Yukimura replied in the same tone, 'I'm not that an idiot when it comes to surrender. I suggest you keep your own business. She's no longer yours.'

Kenshin was silent as I could hear thunder, not too far from here. 'You are doing a terrible, terrible mistake,' Kenshin said slowly, tone was cold and menacing.

Yukimura laughed so hard, I could smell his dirty breath. 'You have got to be fucking kidding me. You just lost a fight. Give up pimp! You ain't nothing but looking for ass trouble. She's mine and you can just get lost in your own mother's ass for crying out loud.'

As Yukimura was about to laugh again, I heard a huge punching noise, as if someone had been hit hard on the wall. I closed my eyes as I felt someone's blow and Yukimura's arms were loosening from my neck. I felt to the floor again as I looked up at kenshin, standing high, towering over Yukimura's body below as he strike another blow on the head using continuous hard kicks that sent Yukimura flying and smashed the window.

Kenshin walked up to me, his left leg was a bit limping and took hold of me. He swept me off the ground and carried me. Unfortunate enough, just as we were about to escape the room, Kenshin yelped in pain. I turned and saw Yukimura smiling rancorously and felt blood trickled down Kenshin's back. I gasped when I saw a knife, planted quite deep on Kenshin's back. I glared at Yukimura and felt kenshin began to weaken. He put me down and hurriedly took the knife away from his back, wincing in pain when he released the knife from his flesh.

Yukimura went silent when Kenshin walked up to him and pointed the knife at his throat. Yukimura just hissed and smiled venomously, 'you, wouldn't, dare.' Kenshin froze.

'Unfortunately enough,' Kenshin loosened. Yukimura's smile widened but Kenshin gave Yukimura a huge hit on the face and knocked him unconscious. He lay on the ground, cataleptic.

'Think again,' kenshin whispered. He took a hold of me and ignoring his pain, he carried me out of the fearsome shack and on the way home.

_later in the morning_

I awoke later with dizziness in my head. I groaned silently to myself and waited for a few minutes. The pain inside was unbearable and I couldn't open my eyes, not until I waited for another minute or so. Finally, I blinked my eyes, trying to find the focus.

I have never felt pain this badly. My body was aching all over, even my eyes from all the crying. I stood up slowly and looked around. I was in Kenshin's apartment, lying on the yellow sofa. It felt so comfortable here despite the pain as I saw the bright daylight from the window. I turned my head around and found kenshin lying on the other side of the sofa, smaller and probably uncomfortable.

I tried to stand up and get to him. I walked slowly until my knees weakened and I feel on the floor just next to him. He was much damaged. He had injuries all over his body. It didn't take me more than 2 seconds to realize that he had a knife struck on his back. I gasped and searched for his cut. He whimpered when I touched his back, my face and body very close to his.

He opened his eyes and stared at me. His face was disastrous, as evident from the fighting last night. I wanted to cry again. I felt something in my throat and chest as I looked at his now soothing yet painful eyes.

I realized I was actually near to the position of hugging him my arms were around his body, as I was searching for his cut. My body was so weak that it fell on to his. Now, my face was so near to his. I could feel his breath, tickling my face. His soft eyes searched into mine, winning over the battle, taking me deep into his soul. I felt his face inched closer and then his lips met mine.

And I won a battle over you because I made this a cliffhanger! I am so evil but I just had to, it gives the excitement. I am hoping you'd enjoy this chapter and maybe take another glance at the first new edited chapter.

Sorry for not answering your replies one by one but I just want to give you all a round of applause for being so great. I will do so however in the next chapter. Exams are coming up as you all know and I am trying my best to keep up with this story. Thanks people!


	14. Unorthodox behaviour

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 14: unorthodox behavior**

Oh my god… I don't mean to say god in the name of vain but oh my god… when was the last time I have put myself together to realize there is one bit of diversion that I used to enjoy doing and yet haven't had the time to complete it. LOL, I am very, very sorry people, really I do. Frankly, I knew about this story and yet I didn't really want to continue it. For a second there, I had some thoughts about this. I mean, what was I thinking? Writing stories as if I'm some kind of unsociable nerd who spent her free time writing stories about things in my mind… I don't mean to be… well, mean, but come to think of it, I did have some oh-my-god-I-am-a-nerd realization.

But then again, here I am and I owe you guys the hugest apologize. Forgive me please? And as a sign of my appreciation I have made this story longer than I have ever done. It was my mistake, and I hope you guys haven't lost interest in this.

GOMENASAIIII!

Anyway, thank you for you who IS by any chance STILL can keep up with me slacking all the time. I'm in Malaysia, starting college and that is one reason why I stopped… took a little break, getting myself used to the environment and the city. Phew… N'ways, enough of me! Let's continue with the story… LOLZ

P.S. I will respond to your reviews later on… if you are still with me. I swear… you have to keep hitting me on this or I will never go onnnn….

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Last chapter:

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

He opened his eyes and stared at me. His face was disastrous, as evident from the fighting last night. I wanted to cry again. I felt something in my throat and chest as I looked at his now soothing yet painful eyes.

I realized I was actually near to the position of hugging him my arms were around his body, as I was searching for his cut. My body was so weak that it fell on to his. Now, my face was so near to his. I could feel his breath, tickling my face. His soft eyes searched into mine, winning over the battle, taking me deep into his soul. I felt his face inched closer and then his lips met mine.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I remembered the dream that I had a couple of weeks ago. I remembered the red head man, saving me from the dark and gave me bright wings. It was the greatest feeling ever. He gave me wings of aspiration, as if to tell me there is hope in my darkened world. Those wings thought me how to fly, and let's just say, flying had never been better.

When his lips touched mine, I felt like flying. I felt as if he pushed me further as I flap my wings and float in the skies above the heavens. It was so similar to my dream. Everything negative crept away in an instant, making me wonder the dreamland that I used to create in my head… what I call 'heaven.'

Kenshin didn't move back, instead he roamed his one hand through my silky locks and pushed his mouth a bit aggressively, as if he had always anticipated this moment.

I could feel my own hands seeking his front shirt, as he sat straight and pulled me into his embrace. I knelt before him, my body between his legs and to my surprise I felt something hard on my stomach. I quivered.

For a moment his lips separated from mine to catch our breath, but still close enough to look deeper into each other eyes. His mysterious eyes made my knees melt and my body became rigid. I was a bit nervous. He was expecting something from me. He was expecting an answer, as if he was asking for my permission to go on. I was grateful for his concern. But something suddenly hit me. Something very awful occurred to me.

I bit my lip and cast down my eyes.

'Kenshin,' I broke into a whisper. He frowned a bit, looking closely at my face. 'I can't remember.'

He frowned even more, 'what do you mean?'

I explored my head in search for a memory. 'I can't remember,' I softly said, 'I thought… maybe… him…'

Kenshin touched my forehead and wiped the sweat of my head. I was so nervous. There was something inside of me that became much darker then ever. I tried to remember what Yukimura had done to me. I shivered at the thought but my frustration exploded inside my head thundered by the thought that I might no longer be...

'I…' my voice ragged and trembled, 'I might not … be a virgin any-' I stopped in mid-sentence. The thought of losing what I precious most made my heart sank even more. I gasped and shook my head violently and again started to cry. My hands held up to my face and I broke apart from Kenshin's grasp. I was trembling in fear, confusion and complete culpability. My body felt fragile and lost. I felt… blackened.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I was a man of honor. I knew that biologically, men don't have self sustain when it comes to sexual behavior. I admit I sometimes have the urge to loosen up and let it all just flow. Thankfully, my training helped me sustain myself to the maximum ability.

This isn't about me though; this is about the girl… No, not a girl anymore, a woman. Kaoru is a woman who continuously experienced many dreadful and appalling encounters. At times, I felt like I should be the one to blame. As I looked upon this woman, crying like a little girl, my mentality went utterly still. For the first time, I felt like I couldn't do anything to help her.

Kaoru fell to the floor and her body was shaking. She cried silently but painfully, I could feel it scratching my body. Anger started to rise and I could feel my head becoming hotter.

'Kaoru,' I started, 'what did he do to you?' I slowly asked.

She shook her head and cried even more. 'I can't… remember.'

My eyes stared blankly at her. My vision blurred. More pain marked on my body. Kaoru's heart was screaming at me. Was she… tainted?

I took her hands slowly away from her face, but she wouldn't look up to me. She must felt humiliated. I don't see how I could blame her.

'Please,' I pleaded in a low whisper, 'I need to know what he did to you.'

Kaoru just rocked her body back and forth. I waited. She cried even more. I could feel a disturbed aura around her. It spiked my whole body. Her body was cold. Kaoru sobbed and wailed. I suddenly remembered Megumi and how she also acted like this. Kaoru's pain felt much worse.

'I can't remember Kenshin,' she sobbed, 'I only remembered his torture. I could fell his hands all over my…' she muffled her sentence and sobbed louder. 'He touched everywhere. I can't… I pleaded… he wouldn't stop.'

Tears were gleaming out of her eyes. I had the urge to hold her. So I did. I seized her in my arms and let her cry on my shoulder. Every wailing and painful sobbing cut deep in my heart. More anger kept rising at every breath breathed. Kaoru was mine and always will be… unlike my last lover. And I shall have my vengeance

* * *

OOOOOOOOO

Later in the afternoon

OOOOOOOOO

She was again asleep in my room. Her fragile body was in my bed. I last glanced at her flawless face, glowing in the afternoon sunlight. I couldn't sleep throughout the day; my mind was focused so much on Kaoru. Someone had killed her dignity, and I felt my anger towards Yukimura nearly in its peak. I was about to explode.

I sighed and went into the kitchen, finding some water. It was Sunday and tomorrow was school. I groaned. I still can't believe we were still in school even to what had happened. I shouldn't make Kaoru go to school. She needed some rest.

As I gulped down the juicy taste of fresh water I began to consider going to the police. I glanced at the door where on the other side laid Kaoru, tangled in despair. I sighed and checked my watch… I need drastic action. For a moment, I thought about fighting her justice in a _real_ justice way. Having Yukimura sued for stealing away something so precious to a woman. But on second thought, why didn't kaoru call the police? Harassment is one thing, raping is another. He tried to steal away more than what Kaoru could bargain for. I sat down on the yellow couch and thought about all these peculiarly disturbing thoughts. An act like this should be guaranteed in court. No matter what, we have all the evidence needed. How can someone like Yukimura still be unaware that this is the 20th century? He must have bridged himself to the dark side of the police headquarters, making sure his actions would suffice in silence.

Suddenly, I heard a knock at my door. My veins went rigid. I could feel my hair standing on my back. I hadn't even felt someone's presence. This unknown person might just be leveled with me. It took me a moment to recover and made my way to open the door…

… As I cautiously opened the door, I gasped. There, in front of me, stood a man of pure dignity, a monstrous compatibility to withstand deadly torture and forever have been my best friend.

'Hey bro!'

'… Sano… sanosuke?' I gasped, emotions of multitude longing and memories came flashing back in multiple hits. In front of me, stood Sanosuke, the man that has always been my best pal for who stood by me for better or for worse. Let me tell you something a little bit about Sanosuke. He was the same age as I am and went to the same fucking rich school as I do. We encountered many deadly disturbing situations with gangsters in and out of school, compiled a plot to drown the principle for sleeping with one of Sano's ex girlfriends, turned down drugs and raved the streets with combat actions to show the whole damn world that us two, are always on top.

I didn't know what to say. His smile was brilliantly shining and his face glowed with passion and I saw the same flicker of light in his eyes every time we supported each other. I nearly cried. He leaned forward and gave me a huge hug. Not one of those gay-ish type of hug, but a man's hug. When connectivity between brothers are long lasting.

After he hugged me, I smiled and shook my head, 'I am… speechless dude.' He laughed and suddenly I felt like I was back home.

'I came all the way here, looked you up and searched for you everywhere and here you are telling me you are speechless?... now I am speechless?' Sano exclaimed and I shook my head again.

'You have no idea how much I've missed you man,' Sano said, 'when you disappeared without telling me, my legs are itching a little bit of man fight.'

I smiled and said, 'well… you know what they say about losers… come in will you?' I stepped back for him to enter.

'I was thinking when you will be saying that?' Sano snickered and stepped in

'It isn't really the kind of home you would imagine I would be living in though,' I said once Sano took his was into the apartment and glanced though it.

'No shit man,' he said, 'this is one piece of crap.'

I sighed and looked at Sano while he rummaged through my things. 'What brings you here ass?' I asked while walking into the kitchen to make some coffee. 'I thought you were applying for the internship?'

Sano looked up and sat down on the couch. 'Hey man, that was long after you left.' I paused briefly and looked at him, 'what are you saying?' 'I'm saying that since you left, somehow the whole world seemed nothing more than a mere boredom.'

I didn't say anything. I have always thought that Sano would go far beyond me. He worked so hard to get into a good school and now he rejected the internship offer. That was shockingly unlike the Sano I know. 'Since when have you become such a loner?' I asked.

'And since when have you chickened out?' was Sano's reply. I made no response but to look at him in the eye. 'Jesus man, we're 17 years old. We have done the greatest shits of our lives and you just happened to _run away_ from all of that? What made you turn dude? I thought we were forwarding together… as brothers?' Sano's voice became louder.

The water boiled and I took it carefully before putting it in the mugs. 'I thought you would understand,' I said softly. I heard him sighed and I handed him the coffee.

Sano grunted, 'and yet I have no idea why you suddenly walked out of your life…' I sipped my coffee slowly, knowing he was right. 'You are not a quitter… I know you better than anyone. And yes, you faced a great problem…' he paused, '… she walked out on him.' With these words I looked up at him…

'What?' I vaguely said. When those words hit me, it suddenly made my heart stopped, realizing a huge force is going to smash me to the ground. Sano didn't make a reply. He closed his eyes and he knew now there was no turning back. My eyes grew wider and said again, 'What?'

Sano placed the mug on the kitchen counter and looked at me into my shocked eyes. 'She said good-bye… Her father got divorced and he is taking her to Switzerland… just a few days after you left. She came to me to ask where you were. I never gave her the answer, knowing you weren't around. She kept asking and asking… crying too…' I took hold of my mug and gripped it tightly. 'She wanted to say good-bye,' Sano continued, '… she also said that…' Sano paused, 'she said that... she loved you. With all her heart and soul… and she could never forgive herself for sleeping with someone else. And she knew you would also never forgive her… After you left, she was so desperate. She barely eaten, starved herself, locked herself up in the room… and you should also know… that she tried to kill herself…'

At this I cringed. I felt nauseated. I clutched hard at my mug.

'… Sano…'

'Kenshin… she lived. Someone found her half conscious and barely made it to the operating room but she made it back. Although she regretted so, she still wanted to apologize to you…'

I stared into space. All thoughts conjured into my mind, winding up all the energy inside of me and blowing me off completely. 'I still don't understand,' I whispered, '… why did she still sleep with him?'

Sano didn't react at all. He knew the answer and he dared not say it to me, knowing I was too weak to take all of this information in. It was breaking my heart; Sano could see it in my eyes.

And without even speaking a single word, I understood why she had slept with my other best pal. I didn't want to admit it but I strangely knew… and I hated it. I slammed my coffee mug on the counter and looked carefully into Sano's eyes. He knew that I understood.

'Look, Kenshin… I really thought that you should know all of this.' Sano said when I walked out of the kitchen and walked back and forth in the living room like a headless chicken… heck, I _am_ a headless chicken. Sano looked desperately at me, knowing that he had hit the rock. 'You deserve the truth man,' Sano exclaimed weakly.

I stopped in my tracks and sighed, 'thank you.'

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I knew what I did was wrong, but I couldn't help but over heard. My head was still aching but I forced myself to stand up and made my way to the door where the small crack gave me the sneaky way to capture their conversation. She glanced at Kenshin's friend, Sano. He was graceful in his own way, but particularly muscular and strong witted, you can see that by the way he walks. He was way taller than Kenshin and his handsome face breathes a unique air. His aura is convincingly darkened by the time he explained about 'the incident' to Kenshin and I was unreservedly appalled when Kenshin immediately altered manner.

Now that he was pacing back and forth, I knew I shouldn't have overheard. _Curiosity killed the cat_ I know. The tension was definitely high and I backed my way before I get dizzier.

Unfortunately, when I tried to make my way back, my head spun wildly and I stumbled to the floor, making a loud noise. The tension immediately broke and I knew they heard the noise. I rolled my eyes and groaned as I pushed myself off the ground.

Incautiously, the door blew open and there stood Kenshin. I could see beads of sweat on his face as he looked at me, huge ray of concern plastered on his face. He took my hand and helped me off the ground and immediately put me back into bed.

He didn't say another word but looked at me in the eye, reassuringly.

Suddenly, I was aware that someone else was watching us. Kenshin turned and saw Sano leaning against the door sill, watching us with gleeful eye.

'That is fast Kenshin,' he said, 'I never knew you would get another one in handy.' Kenshin didn't say anything but pulled the blanket over me and held my forehead. I was at awe at the attention he was giving me. I blushed furiously and gratified my illness for covering my red face.

In spite of that, Sano smiled and came towards me.

'You caught me at the wrong time,' I said shyly. Sano laughed. 'Well… if I say, I _did_ come at the _wrong_ time.'

Kenshin stood up and timidly introduced me to Sano. 'Sano, this is Kaoru, she had a really big incident and that I will explain to you… later. Kaoru, this is Sano, my ultimate best friend and I will explain why he is here… later.'

Kaoru saw Kenshin's face twisting and for a moment I thought I saw sadness in his eyes. He recovered quickly and ushered Sano out of the room. Sano winked at her and flirtatiously smiled. That… was it… I was red to the core. My head was spinning miraculously I assumed it would break any moment.

My eyes became heavy, and still feeling uncertain, I fell asleep, leaving the tension hanging…

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Sano's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I watched Kenshin as he sat down next to me on the couch. The girl in the room was questionable and I was eager to find out who she was. Kenshin doesn't usually take women into his house unless she is very meaningful to him. No matter the good looks, Kenshin still takes pride in who he takes home. I admired him for that, unlike myself who tends to bring any girl into his room, sexing all night long.

Kenshin looked at me and saw sadness. My floating desire to question him suddenly became unbearable. Instead, I shifted my sitting position and sighed.

'I'm sorry Kenshin,' I said, '… really… for everything.' Kenshin smiled sadly. 'I want to forget about it… she doesn't love me anymore…. And she's gone… away from my life, when I thought I was running away from her life.'

I glanced at the apartment and justified why he is here. The apartment is shabby and not very appealing. I guess he has changed. He wants to change.

'Kenshin,' I started, 'I just want to say, that I support you, no matter what, you know that right?' Kenshin nodded and half smiled.

'I guess now you have to tell me about the girl next door.' I proclaimed.

Kenshin took a sip of his coffee before briefing me the whole story…

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

'… and that is why she is here right now… in my room.' I finished, only seeing the shocked expression stapled to Sano's face. Yes I know, I am completely out of my mind. However, Sano's face became deadly serious and this is the time when I need his advice. Man to man, brothers and brothers. This is the kind of time I have always missed. This entire girl shit for nothing. I shouldn't have been so careless. Falling in love is dangerous. I thought it was about time I should stop loving people.

'Kenshin,' Sano softly said, 'I have no idea how you can get into so much mess. But I will always support you, even if I also have to endure many agonizing torments.' I laughed half heartily and said, 'yes, I know you do.'

Sano smacked his hands together and smiled wickedly, 'I guess now, I will be living here. And don't worry I will also take care of the electricity bills and water bills and definitely split the rent in half. And also, I will be going to the same school as you and don't worry; I will definitely take care of myself. Besides, I have already positioned myself in your class… and I think the girl next door's too. And also…' Sano was saying these things so fast that I barely have time to interrupt, so I just sighed and let him continue. '… also, I will be with you all the way and take care of this Yukimura guy. It's about time both of us kick some ass. The hell with pain, I will be enjoying one soon.'

That is the thing about guys like Sano. He can sometimes be very obnoxious but nevertheless dependable. People cannot live without one another; it is just the fact of life. This brotherhood that we have, are complements in our lives. We complete each other, for better or for worse, and with his high spirited attitude, it lifted my heart. I will be enjoying our new life, here, in a new country.

As I glanced back at the door to Kaoru's sleeping figure, I noticed that I have changed hearts. No matter how dangerous love can be, no sooner will I realize that I too… have already fallen in love.

* * *

Oh my god… i mean, oh my god. YES YES YES YES YES! I have completed the 14th chapter of this story and I am enjoying the pleasant feeling of coming back to where I left off…

Again, I apologize for not giving you guys my story… I have no idea what happened, I just couldn't be bothered to start writing again.

I won't say another thing; I will just leave this for you guys to comment. Go ahead, press the button. I dare you too :P


	15. Swinging mode in da capo

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 15: Mood swings in Da Capo**

* * *

****

Say hurray, I have continued with the story. Before I start, I want to give a big round of applause for you for being the greatest reader's of all…

Too bad I didn't get that many reviews… please read… it would mean the world to me…

Truthfully, I got stuck in chapter 14… as if I had no idea how I will continue with the story… seriously…

Author's notes: I do read other people's stories and I notice there were some similarities in the writing. I was always fascinated at the first chapter but as it continued on, I never really prolonged with the story, only because they are agonizingly tedious, As if the writer had no opportunity to think the plot through and hurriedly added unnecessary lines in there. I also admit I had that same problem but I have tried to deter from it. I have always thought the story line was puzzling and not up to scratch because they fail to describe the situation or scene that I lose interest in it. I know… because I had never continued on with the story until half way, then I stop. I am just hoping I don't have that problem with you guys… if you do, please tell me what made it so insufficient or poor.

I have my own style of writing and I like it. Cheers to you all.

Reignashii: Hey, thank you so much for still actually read my stories... i am grateful! HEHEHE enjoy this story!

Sayomi-sama: thank you for also keeping up with the story. It s so great i want to hug you... hehehehe

lone saiyan woman: well, its a good thing your reading this because i am gonna love you if you do so... hehehehehe... please do enjoy the story

xXx oOo

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

LAST CHAPTER:

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Sano smacked his hands together and smiled wickedly, 'I guess now, I will be living here. And don't worry I will also take care of the electricity bills and water bills and definitely split the rent in half. And also, I will be going to the same school as you and don't worry; I will definitely take care of myself. Besides, I have already positioned myself in your class… and I think the girl next door's too. And also…' Sano was saying these things so fast that I barely have time to interrupt, so I just sighed and let him continue. '… also, I will be with you all the way and take care of this Yukimura guy. It's about time both of us kick some ass. The hell with pain, I will be enjoying one soon.'

That is the thing about guys like Sano. He can sometimes be very obnoxious but nevertheless dependable. People cannot live without one another; it is just the fact of life. This brotherhood that we have, are complements in our lives. We complete each other, for better or for worse, and with his high spirited attitude, it lifted my heart. I will be enjoying our new life, here, in a new country.

As I glanced back at the door to Kaoru's sleeping figure, I noticed that I have changed hearts. No matter how dangerous love can be, no sooner will I realize that I too… have already fallen in love.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I spent two days in bed… in _Kenshin's_ bed more accurately. I had given to the plan before any of this ever happened. I was to be protected by Kenshin. The thought of being in his house, protected by someone so beguilingly handsome, would probably be the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me. I was still a bit vigilant about the whole thing. But then I remembered the dream… the red headed man… it appeared in my head those vivid dreams and it reminded me of Kenshin, the man of my dreams.

I shook my head to release the contemplation. Now it's Wednesday, and I was getting ready to go to school. No matter what had happened last week, I still have to move on. In this case, I still had to go to school. As I looked at myself in the mirror, I mused that my face looked a lot different. I had bags under my eyes, it seemed like my face has gone white as a ghost and my lips are dry (the symptoms that you get when you are really ill.) my only response was to sigh every now and then. So many things have happened in less than one night and I was traumatized at the whole occurrence. The only thing keeping the light up my head is the special moment Kenshin and I shared a few days back.

I touched my lips and smiled weakly. Sure, that incident did lighten my spirits up. After those two kisses that I had, I have not yet talked to Kenshin about it. I wanted too, but I didn't want to make things awkward and discomfited between us. Since that kiss and the arrival of Sanosuke into the house, it was not viable to ask what Kenshin was thinking. Sano kept smiling and laughing here and there. I also thought it was because of Sano that my sickness expired quickly. His presence is pacifying and soothing. It also brought smiles to my face. I have to give him that credit.

There was a knock on the door and Kenshin's morning voice made my smile bigger. And so starts a new day like nothing has ever happened… oops… not really. I am spending this new day as Kenshin's girlfriend. Now I know I _will_ be in deep trouble.

Later that day

It's just like the day when Kenshin arrived in this school. Newcomers were always the hot topic of this school. No matter cute or not, everyone hanging out in this school would always jump in and immediately arbiter those newcomers into groups. There are the intelligent ones, cute ones, nerdy ones, classic ones, bitchy ones, and it's always one of those. I was neither, because I always considered myself neutral. Kenshin was part of the obviously hot hunky type… and so was Sano.

When he came in our class, hair jelled and had a cool white cloth around his head, showing some punk in his looks, I immediately gaped at him. Sano is damn tall, the height of a perfect model. His abs shines right through his pleaded white shirt. He had a messy kind of look, which made him peculiar in his own way: messy, but still damn good looking.

When he walked in that door, sighs, gasps, murmurs went through all the class. The girls were whispering excitedly to each other and the guys sighed in desperation, knowing another hunk had joined their school and so it concludes there will be less chance for them to catch a girl. And just like in the movies, in slow movement, where the wind blows his hair even though the room has closed windows and he would smile sexily and so heart meltingly that I began to wonder whether those effects on films _did_ happen.

I was sitting at the middle row, near the window and Kenshin sat way behind in the last row. When Sano came in, he waved at two of us and the girls immediately looked over at Kenshin in excited tones and looked at me in disgust. Michi was sitting in front of me and she saw the interaction that she looked behind and gleefully stared at me. I only rolled my eyes and said, 'I'll fill in for you later.' She responded by giggling to herself and stared at the newcomer.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I knew something like this would happen. Now that Sano is the new me… I wasn't much of the hot topic. The difference between me and Sano is that he is taking the pleasure in having girls crawl around him. But I knew him better than anyone else. One might see him as a playboy, but I merely see him as a guy who is scared of a relationship. He wouldn't do anything to hurt the girls, he just enjoys flirting and making them blush the deepest red. I know what Sano does because I too, do the same. I recalled the past experience with Kaoru and I would smile each time the thought sprang into my head.

In the cafeteria that day, all the school population stared at us. On our table sat Sano, Kaoru and her friend Michi, who excitedly wanted to sit next to Sano, and Sano, being the gentleman that he always was, gave in to her. Kaoru sat next to me, with blushing red cheeks and I knew what she was thinking. I kissed her in front of the whole class and pronounced her as my girlfriend. It was wrong for me to do that but there was some magnetism in Kaoru that made me shuffle all hard thoughts in my head and did what my conscience told me… I kissed her.

I pretended to be enjoying my food and not seeing the stares and giggly girls around me. But I couldn't help but notice all those cold and jealous stares for Kaoru. My only response was to stare and them and they stopped whispering and continued with their solemn lunch.

'I get them all the time now,' Kaoru said. I looked at her and ate some salad. I noted she was most probably talking about the stares.

'Hey,' I said, 'I will protect you.'

Kaoru looked at me in the eye as if searching for an answer. 'Yes,' she whispered, 'but how long will that last.' I could hear Sano laughing in the distant. I didn't intend on having this conversation right now. 'Let's not talk about it,' I said quietly and continued eating.

Kaoru said nothing, but she didn't eat. Instead, she took her tray with her and got up. I looked up at her, 'where are you going?'

Kaoru shuffled with her bag and said, 'I'm going somewhere to eat where there is peace and quiet.' Michi saw Kaoru leaving and said sorry to both of us and beckoned for us to excuse her before she left following her friend. I didn't look back after them.

'So, what happened?' Sano asked. I shook my head. 'O, it's one of those lovers quarrel isn't it.' He laughed halfheartedly.

'Sano…' I started. My voice was cold but I didn't continue. Instead, I grabbed my bag and took my tray with me, 'I'm also going to find somewhere where there is peace and quiet.'

Sano was startled, 'Hey man, I'll come with you.'

I shook my head, 'no Sano, I wish to be alone right now.' And with that I went, leaving Sano with curiosity in his mind. I guess by then, he also wished to summon peace and quiet, because when the girls have left their table, other girls were starting to fidget his way. Maybe for now he didn't want to acknowledge them. So, not long after I left, he grabbed his lunch and bag and set off, before the girls come crashing his way.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

'Hey Kaoru,' a voice behind me shouted, 'wait up will you!'

I stopped in my tracks and looked behind. There ran Michi, carrying her bag and tray. I didn't really want company but I also didn't want to sound so desperate myself. I just watched Michi catching her breath when she neared me.

'What's wrong kaoru?' Michi said, gasping for breath. 'By the way, you walk so fast I can barely keep up.'

My face softened and I held her arm, 'I don't know Michi. I really don't know what had happened to me lately. I just… maybe it's my sickness. I haven't yet fully recovered.'

'Well I'll say…' Michi said, taking a hold of her tray and my arms at the same time. We were outside the school's backyard. The sun was shining brilliantly and the wind blew softly. In this perfect weather condition, I was the one feeling imperfect.

We sat down under the cool Sakura tree that I had always liked to sit under. My mind was jumbled with all possible complexity and diversity. And while Michi was rambling about how the sun glistened and the wind is nonchalant and supple, I only stared into space, pretending I was hearing her.

Instead, my concentration was on Kenshin. How can there be someone so handsome and yet so mysteriously caring? It just seemed impossible in this new era. He had been such a gentleman, and the conversation he had with sano about his… ex… made me think twice about him. Something in his past made Kenshin the way he is now. He became so protective and kind. He somehow didn't like the attention from other girls because of his good looks and whether I believe it or not, he had experienced being loved and being in love. Sano and Kenshin was an amazing couple. They stand out among the crowd and still cling on to each other and support each other. For a moment, I felt a pang of jealousy. I had that with Misao, but since she disappeared out of my life, I felt a deep loss and defeat.

Then my mind spun to another intriguing and traumatized topic… it was what happened the other night at that vile shack. Somehow, God had contemplated me to disregard what ever had ensued. Why could I not remember anything?

_Had he taken my virginity?_

Those words were always on my mind, in sickness or in health. I proximate a sense of loss and yet I felt full of disgust. At that time at the shack, my eyes were so blurry, my skin became insensitive and voices and ringing in my ears did not help me at all. I couldn't recall what happened and every time I tried to, my head always ached.

It was a huge thing. How can I not remember? And moreover, Yukimura had been my first love. So yes, I was in love with him but we never got the chance to do it because I love him too much to do it. I know it sounds crazy but now I am very grateful I didn't do it.

_Life without love, is no life at all_

My mother's words kept replaying in my head. But sooner I realized, you begin with love, overgrown it by relationship and always ends in tears. I sighed in my mind and told myself, "mother, I am sorry, but I don't think those words have not convinced me enough."

'… and so Shinta kept asking for my…'

Michi's words went by and I have yet to notice her words at all. I looked down at my food and felt nauseated. I had lost my appetite. But I was still hungry… I was still hungry for hope…

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Sano's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

The journey through the corridor had been unpleasant. After the incident in the cafeteria, my mood became bitter. I felt cold, I need to break something. When I walked through the corridors, many… no not many, thousands of girls went coming my way, either asking for my name, getting to know me, my phone number, or email address.

I usually put up with this but I wasn't in the disposition to confront them. I merely nodded and as rapidly as I can, went past them, leaving them with their own hectic ness.

I didn't want to look for Kenshin. He had a lot in his mind now. But what really stressed me, is the raven haired girl, who just out of nowhere, came into Kenshin's life. Kenshin had enough broken hearts to last him a life time, but now with this new commotion going on, I'm not so sure I was able to stand still.

My pace became faster, and just when I was about to turn the corner, I slammed into someone that was just passing by.

'Fuck!' a cool and yet cold voice of a woman shouted, 'Hey, watch where you're going!'

I turned to look at the person who I just bumped into, wanting to give this woman a little piece of me. Instead, I impeded my ability to be sarcastic and rude because standing in front of me was a really beautiful woman. She was wearing the same school clothes as I did. She had the most gorgeous face, comparable to an angel's. Her long dark hair flooded her well grown female body and I stood completely dead in my tracks.

She looked at me in disgust. 'Cih,' was her only response. I didn't say anything but stared at her blankly, unknown to myself that this is the most infrequent behavior I would do in front of a very fine-looking young woman. I noticed her eyes puffy and her cheeks a bit red. But she turned away quickly, waving her long hair in front of me, and all I did was to gaze at her walking away…

…

It was that hollowness that completely made me… bemused. I had to run for her. And so, with no hesitation at all, I ran to look for her. My spirits went high and my heart became rapidly beating. I ignored the fact that I was too raring to go that I bumped many people along the way, hearing grunts of pain and excruciating "fuck you's."

Then I lost her. I looked right and left, here and there but there was no sign of her. I signed in frustration. Great! I banged my fist against the nearest wall, making other people look at me in confusion. I pretended to ignore her.

Well, look on the bright side. At least I know she is from this school…

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

It's one of my mood swings again. I thought I would feel great enough to liberate my insecurities and unleash off all the stress that is lodged in my head once I sat down calmly at the top of the building, enjoying the zephyr waving my flocks in the air and the callous heat of the sun. I guess I was wrong.

Instead, the atmosphere made me think more about the vast space in my head that is filled with none other than the woman that made me think about her all the time. There had been not much talk between us and I desperately needed to straightened things out with her. Sighing, I glared at the sky, so bright, blue and smooth, as if no obstacles are in the way… any obstacles.

I stood up and walked my way to the edge of the building. I grasp the scenery of school's backyard and as I skimmed through, I focused on an individual, sitting under a sakura tree…

Yes, I needed to talk to her. So I grabbed my bag, left my tray and made my way down to the woman beneath the Sakura tree.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

As I continued to falsely be interested in Michi's bizarre tête-à-tête. I became mute and stared at her vacantly, smiling weakly now and then.

Suddenly, Michi's face twisted and smiled happily at something behind me. I frowned and before I turned my head to see what she was smiling at, someone embraced me from behind. I saw red…

'Hey Kenshin,' I blushed, trying to unfold the embrace, 'what are you doing?'

Kenshin tucked a flock of hair behind my ear and I turned my head slightly. I still couldn't see his eyes but his lips are daringly close. He whispered in my ear that made shivers go up and down my spine, 'you look more beautiful when you smile.'

I said nothing. I was speechless… 'Wha… what do you mean?' I giggled nervously.

'Why don't you and I take this day off?' Kenshin whispered again. Then Kenshin let go just slightly from the embrace and looked at me in the eye.

'What?' I asked confusedly.

'Let's both go somewhere, just the two of us. Let's ditch next period and get our asses out of here.'

I shook my head slightly, quite stunned by his sudden change of attitude. But then again, this _is_ his real attitude. He had a devilish characteristic inside of him that made him so attractive. It was just like the time we ditched detention and the kissing scene. I suddenly had the urge to become devilish as well. So I slowly smiled and nod my head.

Kenshin smiled back and took my bag, lifted me off the ground and winked hotly at Michi. Michi looked at Kenshin with those bubbly eyes of hers. I only mimicked, 'bye' to Michi and waved. She just smiled and shook her head rigorously. Maybe luck really is just around the corner…

* * *

Okay, there is Kaoru's confusion with Kenshin and the past incident, change of mood in the cafeteria, Sano's eye on a hot black headed young woman, and Kenshin's hot date. What do you guys think? Reading enough already? Need more? Please review! My hope is with all of you.

It would be great to read my notes and my opinions… even though I don't really think it is necessary.

Hugs and kisses xXx oOo.


	16. The Amazing Date, etc

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 16: The amazing date

* * *

**

Guess what? I just had my appendix removed. I had an operation and walked like an old lady. It hurts to laugh and I despise those that made me laugh. I had to suffer for laughing! Ever heard of that?

Happyangel123: Hey thank you very much for the review. I appreciate it the whole bits. X

Kenshinobsession: I am amazed you are still reading my story. I mean, after I ditched readers for like, a really long time. Anyway, as a sign of gratitude, I'd like to give you a little treat with this next chapter. X

Jodibetz: thank you so very much. I owe you for still reading my stories.

Gabyhyatt: Hey, thank you for loving it. I had a wonderful time writing it. X

Reignashii: you are like my all time favorite reviewer. Thank you for even glancing at my page. It's really cool you're still hanging around reading people's stories… cuz I just don't have the time to do that. Actually, I wanna go to your place and read some of your stories… hehehehe. X

Now I am all set and ready to go with the story. Here is from me to you… **_a little bit of surprise in this story so I want all of you to be a little bit prepared_.** At least have a pop corn in hand, you might need it  ho ho ho ho

Anyway, continue with the story babay! this is my christmas present... for you

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Last chapter

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

'Let's both go somewhere, just the two of us. Let's ditch next period and get our asses out of here.'

I shook my head slightly, quite stunned by his sudden change of attitude. But then again, this is his real attitude. He had a devilish characteristic inside of him that made him so attractive. It was just like the time we ditched detention and the kissing scene. I suddenly had the urge to become devilish as well. So I slowly smiled and nod my head.

Kenshin smiled back and took my bag, lifted me off the ground and winked hotly at Michi. Michi looked at Kenshin with those bubbly eyes of hers. I only mimicked, 'bye' to Michi and waved. She just smiled and shook her head rigorously. Maybe luck really is just around the corner…

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

It's funny how our feelings change in an instant. One moment you were in complete blankness, being in a dark hole that has no end, then suddenly you can bright up and smile away the darkest feeling inside. As Kenshin held my hand, we were walking down the streets of Kyoto, I just feel like smiling all the time. I couldn't stop those muscles that spring my mouth into a goofy smile.

The city was busy as always, and I am pretty sure all of you have seen the bustling city of Japan. Everything just seemed overcrowded and packed.

The air was getting colder and dry; the sign that autumn is coming soon. I breathed the air in and glanced here and there while taking in the satisfaction when people see us pass… well, Kenshin more precisely. Of course they were thinking why someone like me could be holding hands with someone as handsome as Kenshin. Yes, I thought as I glanced up at him, his face was a dream, so bright in the sun. His hair blew softly against the wind, his eyes sparkled and he held a face of pure contentment, as if being here with me is the greatest thing on earth.

I ignored the whispers that I get. I didn't care. I was enjoying the moment of being Kenshin's girlfriend. So then, as I took a step onto the busy road, I walked confidently with our hands clutched in unison… with my goofy grin.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Later on

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

We have walked for quite some time so I began to wonder where Kenshin was taking me.

'Hey,' I started, 'tell me where we are heading!'

He grinned and looked at me, 'it's a surprise.'

I frowned. Okay, I know this area better than anyone in the city and Kenshin had only touched this place for a few months and yet he is taking me somewhere surprising. I ignored the confusion in my head and pondered the streets, recapping where we are. It turns out we were nearing the Sakura park. During an autumn like this, the sakura trees blooms beautifully, emitting splendor and magnificence at its most exquisiteness. I watched one of the trees coming to view and for a moment I felt calmness.

'Kenshin,' I said, 'are we going to the park?'

He glanced at me and winked. 'There's much more than that,' was all he said.

I frowned again, thinking he must be nuts or playing around with me. Then, he stopped in front of the entrance park and he took something out from his bag. It was a long white linen cloth. He turned to me and smiled mischievously. I saw his sneer and shook my head.

'No way,' I said, 'you are not putting that on me.'

'Hey, come one Kaoru,' he said, 'it'll ruin the fun.' I looked at his face in search for mischief, thought twice and said, 'well, alright. I might regret this.'

He stepped in front of me and prepared to cover my eyes with the fold, 'trust me. You'll love it.' He neared yet so close to me that I could smell his scent, a lovely musk. I sense his masculinity and blushed slightly, breathing in his enticing smell. Then, I saw black. I can only hear the soft wind gushing and the sound of children's laughter and screams, the bustling of the streets and afternoon calmness.

He took a hold of my arm, directing my steps. I felt a little clumsily since I couldn't say anything. It was a fun journey though. That was because I walked so slow and sometimes I nearly tumble forward that we both laugh heartily. I tried to sense where he was taking me. Instead, as we walked further, I could hear a familiar music.

A few minutes later we stopped. I took a moment to sense the place we were at, only to hear the same familiar music and children's laughter and screams.

Suddenly, Kenshin took off the fold over my eyes and I blinked a few times to adjust my eyes. As my cloudy vision cleared I gasped. A tear nearly fell from my cheeks. I closed my mouth with both my hands, couldn't help all these strong feelings coming out. I wanted to cry and laugh at the same time. I could feel Kenshin's presence beside me, looking at my face and smiling knowingly. He tapped my back and wrapped his arm around me and pulling me toward him. I was too awed to respond, only to let him hold me close.

Finally, I laughed, 'Kenshin, you know how corny this is!'

He laughed as well, 'well, corny is always fun. And I know you will love this place.'

'You should know we are too old for these kinds of things.'

'Says who? No matter how old we are, we still have the same childish character inside of us.' He paused, 'it's time to let our false nature to be mature go. It's time to have fun.'

Yes, it might be corny, being in a mini theme park. But there were so many strong feelings from this that I couldn't ignore. All these memories that had almost vanished suddenly came flowing back inside my head. Those moments where my mother and father would still hold my hand and we would all laugh together. Those days were gone, but I could recall back the beautiful smile my mother would show, her glowing features made my heart float. My father would laugh too and hold me in his arms while I ate a pink cotton candy. It was only those moments that we have truly found happiness.

Suddenly, a single tear rolled down my cheeks but I didn't wipe it off. Kenshin glanced at me, 'what's wrong?'

I smiled, 'I had always waited for this moment, the moment when my mother and father would take me here again.' I paused and Kenshin didn't respond. 'I was so happy back then, I felt so alive. There were many memories with them that I lost and never found them back.' I could see my mother's smile in my head.

There it happened. I was crying in front of Kenshin. 'Oh my god, I miss them so much.' Kenshin hugged me and I cried onto his shirt like a little child lost in a playground. He shushed me to assure that it was okay. 'I'm sorry,' he whispered.

'No,' I pushed my head back a little so that I could see his face, 'you had done an incredible thing. I should thank you.'

More than ever, I needed all the comfort in the world. More than ever, I needed a pole to cling on to. I thought I would never find it. But when Kenshin's lips touched mine, all the hardness, foul, atrocious and upsetting moments instantly filtered from my whole body and soul. I felt elevated, the ground untouched, weight lifted and bright white wings pushing me up to the firmament.

I opened my mouth consciously to let him enter me. I could feel his surprise that I answered his kiss. So he pushed his tongue inside and I gasped in pleasure. He wrapped his arms around me even more and I grasped the back of his shirt, telling him I needed more. He played around with my mouth and tongue. It wasn't an innocent kiss. I have learnt all of this before and I know Kenshin too is not an amateur. This time though, we were more passionate.

Kenshin held the small of my back with his hand and held my shoulders with his other arms. I moaned when he pushed further. I needed more. I also took one of my hands and went down to the small of his back, carefully brushing slightly along his spine so that he could feel the shivers. I made a small smile when he shuddered and moaned, pushing even further to the kiss.

'Mommy, mommy, look, they are kissing,' a small child said.

It was then that our connection broke and we awkwardly let go of each other, leaving the warmth. I blushed furiously and Kenshin laughed knowingly. It was then that Kenshin took a hold of my hand and said, 'let's do that another time. For now, let's go have some fun.'

When he winked at me, my blush was more than I could handle, but I let him held my hand and lead the way, not leaving the warmth that we both shared.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I know I should have held back. But when I saw her crying in my arms, I couldn't help but give in to the moment. I was surprised that she answered to my kiss. Even more surprisingly, she was actually _good_ at what she was doing. When I saw her for the first time, I thought that she was still innocent. Boy was I smashed. She made me tremble, which isn't exactly something that I had felt with other girls before, surely not from Tomoe.

I watched this young woman in front of me laughing and enjoying her moment and I thought, 'she is amazing.' She made me feel like a bee to a honey. I was so attracted to her it was impossible now to turn back. I know more than enough about her; it was like I was a big part of her life. At least, that is what I was hoping for.

Kaoru's laughter made my heart leap. It was more than wonderful to share happiness with the person that you love. At least I have brought smile on to her face. She needed to have a great time. She needed some reassurance in her despondent life.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Sano's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I gazed at the table of Kenshin and Kaoru and immediately came to a typical conclusion. I knew Kenshin's moves and motives. I smiled at the thought. I'm just happy he is back to his normal self again, those flirtatious moments. It was since Tomoe that he acted differently, both good and bad.

I sighed and stared outside the window. Maybe I should just ditch class as well. I thought about it twice. It was 5 minutes before class starts I might as well follow the foot steps of our hero of the day. So with a heave, I snagged my bag and took off.

When I touched the soft grass of the school's big yard, I tried to think of a place where I can soothe my mind, maybe a club or playing pool. Pool sounds good. I should be able to find a place to play pool around here. It was a city after all. I know a good place just near here.

I reached streets and followed the path towards the pool house. Then I wanted to look around the area. There were many mousy streets here and I might as well take a peek at some of them to see where it could lead to. I was new here after all.

So, with a smile, I followed a narrow road. It had quite a bumpy road and small enough for two people to walk through. I passed many other roads and I took some by guess, like going through a maze.

Peculiarly, when I pass through yet another small street, I heard a silent whimper. I thought about ignoring it when I saw it was a girl in the same school clothes as I had, slouched, leaning against the dirty wall. Her dark hair flowed perfectly over her curved figure. She was crying, folding her arms together to hide her face. It was then that I was interested.

So, I made up my mind. I walked towards her. As I neared, she didn't glance up, figuring I would pass her and ignore her. Instead, I stopped just in front of her. She sensed my presence and looked up. My guess had been right. It was the girl I had been dying to search for.

When she looked up at me, I came into contact with the same beautiful dark pool of eyes that sucked me in. Her beautiful face however was muddled with tears and run down mascara. I frowned when I saw a bruise on her left cheek. When she saw me, immediately she stopped crying, whipped her face, and angrily stood up.

'What the hell do you want,' she exclaimed.

'Here,' I said, showing her my handkerchief. She frowned and gazed at my face, not taking the handkerchief. 'Hey, take it. Can't you accept a man's good intention?'

She only turned her face and walked away, 'I'm not a charity.' For a moment I was bewildered. It was unusual for a girl to refuse my offer. But I took a hold of myself and tried to catch up with her before I lose her again.

'It's good enough that someone wants to lend a hand. Please do consider the good intention.' I said when I caught up to her and walked beside her.

'Your only intention is to be flirtatious. Your objective is to make someone fall for you for being flirtatious.' She said and in one swift moment I was taken aback, surprised by her straight forward comment.

'Well, truthfully, that had always been my intention,' I said back with the same straight forwardness.

'If you keep being persistent, I would have to scream 'harassment'.'

'Well, the more you are resistant, the more I am determined to be persistent.'

'May I ask you _why_ you are being importunate?'

'Because I have the exigency to get to know you.'

'And what makes you think I would allow you to do that?'

'That's why I have to be persistent.'

She stopped to look at me with angry eyes. I was enjoying this little conversation that I also stopped and stared at her back, grinning mischievously.

'How can I stop you?' she asked me with a quiet angry whisper.

'All you have to do is share a word or two with me.'

'A word or two? Good day.' And with that, she walked off again.

I caught up with her again and had a determination to catch her like I always do with other girls. This one sure is feisty and I am liking every second of it.

'You strike me as abominable but I am deeply attracted to you. I can't help it.' I started saying but she didn't respond so I continued, 'the first time I saw you… remember when I bumped into you? It was then that I fell for you. Damn you're gorgeous. You have such magnificent eyes and your hair is astoundingly striking. I wanted to catch up with you but you disappeared so quickly that I…'

She stopped at her tracks and bellowed, 'when will you stop?'

'Hey, calm down there foxy,' I rose up both my hands in defense. She was glaring at me with such annoyance that I said,' right, tell me one reason why I should stop?' She didn't say anything at first; I only received glares from her. Finally she said, 'you want a reason?' she asked. 'Yeah, why not?' I asked back. She closed her eyes and breathed in before continuing…

'Because men like you never had a good intention of liking a girl. They always take advantage of you and saying all the fucking nice things we want to hear but you turn a devil behind our backs, saying all the things we are most ashamed off and once you grow tired of us you can just dump us and crush us to the ground so that we could feel humiliated with ourselves. Once you're finished, you carry on finding another prey.' Her voice rose at every word breathed, 'It is because men like you women cry their fucking asses off, regretting those moments we could have avoided and yet has no ability to fix it.' She had tears in her eyes, 'it's because men like you women lose all hope even though they try as they might in search of a light… because you took it away.'

There was a moment of awkward silence. She breathed absurdly, as if all that talk wore her out. It was clear she was obviously upset about something. Her face showed disturbance, angriness, disappointment and loss of hope. It was clear she wanted me away. I had to back up.

'I understand your disappointment. I'll back down.' I said, and I saw her relax a little, 'but I just want you to know… that I never had those intentions.' I stared at her hard, trying to give her the message. 'You can never judge a book by its cover.' She stared at me more intently and grasped her bag tightly, ready to go.

'Before you go, I just need one thing from you…' She stared at me. 'Give me a name… give me your name.'

She seemed to be thinking twice about this. Then her eyes locked the ground before answering silently, 'Megumi' and she took off.

I stayed at my position, only to watch her back running away from me. It took me a moment to regain my composure. Then I silently breathed the name, the name that I would cherish and keep in my box of treasure… 'Megumi…'

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

It was 9 at night and we were back at my place. It had been a pleasant day and I was looking forward to spend more time with her. We were laughing a lot and I was happy that she was content. Everything just seemed to go along so smoothly.

When Kaoru came in the apartment, she crashed to the yellow sofa, making the stuffy noise of leather. She sighed in content and closed her eyes. I searched the house for Sano. He seemed to not be in tonight. I opened the door to the fridge to get some water and asked whether Kaoru would like some as well. She smiled a yes and went back to her comfortable position.

'Hey Kenshin,' Kaoru called, 'you've got popcorn?'

I smiled. 'Of course I do,' I answered back, 'what would life be without pop corn.'

'Hm,' Kaoru smiled, 'let's enjoy ourselves with some popcorn and a cheesy movie.'

I stared at Kaoru, 'why does that sound so incongruous?'

'Oh come on!' Kaoru exclaimed, 'all of today's cheese had been tacky!'

'Hey,' I responded in defense, 'do not insult my cheese. I ate bad ones quite many times.'

Kaoru laughed whole heartedly and went to search for a movie. I gave in and went to look for my microwave popcorn.

When I finished my task, I took the popcorn and two canned cokes before seating myself beside Kaoru. She rearranged herself on the sofa while turning on the TV, adjusting all the required settlements. I smiled even more when she tried to make herself comfortable on the sofa, punching here and there to comfy the couch. 'Don't kill the sofa,' I whispered in her ear. She blushed… 'Sorry.'

It was then that we started to watch the movie. Needless to say, I wasn't enjoying the movie at all (it was a ghost story by the way) and under any circumstances, I felt overjoyed just to sit next to Kaoru.

I've watched the movie long since the days of merry go heights, I only pursued to take pleasure in Kaoru's whimpering actions each tense scene comes through. I don't want to baffle more, but she had become contagious to the movie that each time she screamed she would hide in my arms, not realizing she was deadly close to me. Is it always like this with women? Most of the women I was with were absurdly terrified at scary movies, and every time I would complain to Sano that women had no sense of logic. Of course, that was ages ago… I had changed my perception since I actually _grew up_ and learn to advocate women's disability to be scared at feign things.

It was the 6th time Kaoru held on to my shirt and hid under it that I finally laughed out loud. Kaoru pasted a look of surprise to her face while she saw men keeping on laughing.

'What is so funny?' she demanded. I laughed even harder while pointing to the screaming girls that was chased around for what seemed to be a banshee and she blushed furiously. 'Do not insult me.'

I tried to stop laughing but seeing those teary eyes reverted back to the screen and suddenly screamed when she saw the television made a powerful unpleasant noise for what seemed to be a banshee scream, I couldn't stop laughing. She frowned at me and punched me on the arm.

'Ow, okay, okay, okay,' I defended, trying my best to hold my laughter. 'I'm sorry Kaoru… its just that you look so…' then I laughed again. Kaoru set pause to the video and turned the TV off.

'O, please,' Kaoru said, 'you're being judgmental.'

'I am not,' I replied back.

'Yes you are and why do men always make these comments?'

'Yeah, but you look awfully demented and twisted for this fabricated movie.'

'You dare say that to me!' she yelled and suddenly, without warning she tickled my waist and I yelled in surprise… I was caught unprepared and unbalanced that I fell down from the sofa. Kaoru laughed at me, and then came down to tickle me again. I was fast on my moves and tickled her back before she could get me. She yelped and I laughed heartily dodging her moves and tickling back in an act of resistance.

It was one of those moments in the movies when a couple played around with each other with those gushy mushy epochs full of cheesy situations. Well, let's just say, this is exactly like that scene, just a little more… hot.

This was my position after the whole tickling: Kaoru was below me and I was on top of her, close enough to feel her hard breathing due to the laughing and clumsy giggling. I was met none other than a familiar pool of dark eyes, sucking my breath away. My body was lightly pressed against hers and faces inches away. It took a moment to realize how close we were. I was locked in this position. Even though I instructed myself to get away, all I could do was to drown in those eyes. She wasn't disturbed either, rather, she was blushing crimson red.

It seemed like time had slowed down and I was consumed by the power of this sensuality, I couldn't further my conscious moves but instead to lock my lips with hers. She gasped at the sudden touch, but a second later moaned and returned my kiss. The heat became hotter and I was oblivious to my surroundings. I had her in my arms and that was all I need, as I painfully ignored the hardness in my groin.

Kaoru played around with my tongue while keeping her hands wrapped around my body, clinging helplessly. I could sense her eagerness in her kiss. She then held her hands against my face and kissed harder, pulling me down, it was then that I voiced a pleasurable moan. I sank away my second thoughts. I want this, I need this. So with a much more heated pace, I kissed her more passionately…

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I had never imagined the situation that was happily taken place would be in a real life. I had always seen these scenes in dodgy movies. That I why I kept replaying those sad and skeptical questions that kept popping in my head one after the other. Is this really a dream? Is this what I had been fantasizing all this time? Is this how passion and love mingle together? I was overjoyed by this sudden change that I ignored my nervous heartbeat and continued to kiss.

Kenshin roamed his hands on my stomach and I felt a pleasurable butterfly in my stomach, I gasped. We separated our lips for a moment and Kenshin furthered his kiss to my cheeks then slowly moved to my neck. I was reaching higher and higher, playful and innocent thoughts occurred in my head. He was consuming my neck and shoulders, desperately trying to get rid of my shirt to expose more skin. I was heated even quicker with every touch of his mouth against my skin.

In return, I nibbled his ear. As far as I know, the ear is a significantly sensitive part of a man, everyone should know that. With the slightest touch, he would harden. True enough, he moaned in pleasure and increased the pace. I kept my hands roaming all over his back, then reached just above his belt, reached to take out his shirt and reached my hands inside to feel the bare flesh. It was more than Kenshin could bear. He stopped his actions with my neck and took a hold of my mouth again. Kenshin's back was firm with masculinity. I could feel those muscles moving in response to my touch.

Kenshin put his one hand on my shoulder, the other on my waist, and then he slowly moved his hand across my neck and down to my cleavage, asking for permission. I shivered with delight and kissed him harder to respond that I wanted him to continue no matter how vulnerable I could be at times like these. I could feel his smile against my lips and he abruptly cupped my breast. I breathed out a moan and arched my back for him to continue his congenial work. He worked my breast at a slow pace at first, caressing my nipples through my bra while working with my ear. I would have moaned louder if only there wasn't any linen separating our flesh. I desperately needed a contact.

With no more vacillation, I raised my body up and kissed Kenshin upwards, so that he would kneel in front of me. I pushed him to the sofa and quickly kissed him. He sat helpless while I sat in between his legs. I rapidly unbuttoned his shirt and discarded them away. Momentarily, I consumed his whole well built body. I was awed at his physique. He definitely worked out.

I know you would be surprised. How could someone like me ever become so confident at something so atypical? That question popped into my head when I saw his stare seizing every last bit of my body that he could take. I had a sudden momentary lapse of ambiguity and insecurity at what I was thinking of doing. It was as if I was to drunk on lust that I needed someone's touch. I wanted to feel my self-reliance. I want to show him this is what Kamiya Kaoru is made of.

So without another moment to lose, I winked and smiled mischievously at him, while he responded with a hot smile, understanding that I wanted to do this. I slowly undressed my top in front of him. Kenshin enjoyed the scene more than ever, gazing and taking in every curve, every inch of my skin that he felt so hard. I threw my shirt aside and we both gazed at our glorious bodies.

My heart was beating rapidly. This was it. I waited for this moment more than anything. It all felt just right. I wanted him to devour all of me… and I want him to be mine… I also want him to have me. So I leaned closer, barely touching our flesh together but close enough for him to hear me whisper in his ear, 'you look so hot.'

He smiled when I turned to him, took a hold of my arm and gently pulled me in towards him so I could hear him whisper, 'while you look pleasurably gorgeous, I want to eat you.' I was ready to blush but I confidently wiped it away and gave him a smile. We looked at each other with knowing smiles, realizing how naturally sound this is. Usually, I would become shy at something like this, but being with Kenshin gave me inner confidence, like knowing everything would be perfect with him.

'Nice bra,' he commented. I looked down at my black bra and gave him a look through my locks.

'But I prefer them off of you.'

I giggled and kissed him slowly at first. I think this would be the time. I want to erase those horrible memories of what I had done with my ex. I want to soon forget all the possible causalities my heart could not tolerate.

Kenshin slowly moved his naughty hand up my back, along my spine, making me shiver in delight, and worked with my bra. Suddenly, I heard a noise, like a door banging open and automatically became aware that we were quite undressed. We were caught nude handed. The lights were dimmed but we both could see the intruder coming in to our apartment door. It was Sano.

He was talking like normal as always but he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw both of us topless. Moreover, we were on top of each other, obviously not the very best normal position for others to see. For a few seconds neither of us moved. We were still, dead in our tracks. A few seconds pass, and I was the first to move away. With red blushing cheeks and complete embarrassment, I walked off to my bedroom, clutching my clothes to cover the front part of my body.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

'You could have at least knocked!' I shouted silently at Sano when the door to Kaoru's room slammed shut. My voice scented anger and embarrassment.

Sano snickered and closed the door, 'dude, you could have at least told me you were planning all this. Man, you were pretty damn hot. You gotta teach me some moves.'

I made a face at Sano and put back my clothes on. 'Shit man, you ruined it,' I angrily said again. Everything had been going perfectly and damn pleasurable, not until this person in front of me came in and ruined it all.

'Hey, I'm really sorry dude.' Sano said, 'I mean, usually you don't go this public. Whatever happened to the old days? _I_ was the one that usually go public. Don't take my predicate!'

It was true that in my younger years I hated to go out public. Even making out in front of other people is just not my thing, at least, not until I met Tomoe. She was strikingly different that any girls I know. She even taught me stuff that was interesting and quite pleasurable. However, I was quite thrown off when Kaoru was pretty damn confident about herself. It was hard not to fall in love with her. She was just too gorgeous…

Sano was blushing and he sat down on the sofa apologizing to me again and again and again. I wasn't listening. I was staring at the door that belongs to a woman I was very much interested in.

When Sano wouldn't stop apologizing, I glared at him and he jumped back, frightened. I guess there are limits to people. And you know guys just could not hold them for long. Curse Sano for ruining this brilliant day… I swore I was going to kill him.

* * *

**OOOOOOOOO**

Hey guys… I was hoping that you would review more… I mean… I know I haven't been the best writer yet and I do make mistakes here and there. But could there just be a little understanding that I too need to know whether I am making progress or not… whether or not if I should continue…

That is why I wanted to take a brake… and I will continue to update this story if I could obtain more than 15 reviews….

Author's note: I know this lime might have ruined some of you who are involved in a more deeply romantic side where they would have a brilliant virgin sex… but I just can't go with that… that is why I made it a bit aggressive… and tell me whether that is a good thing or not because this is my first lime.

Author's philosophy (or something like that): See, we are young adults and with this modern day and everything… sex is beginning to be like take away cheese burger from McDonalds… if you know what I mean. It happens all around us and I need to consider the situation and time period these young happy and highly sexually charged individuals are in…

Anyway, enough of me baffling… please review so I can continue with the next chapter… bon voyage! Merry Christmas and a Happy new year. Happy holidays everybody! Love you reviewers who still continually read my stories… I love you all to bits!


	17. Confusion

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 17: Confusion**

Let me first of all thank you again for still reading my stories.

Author's note: I just want you all to know that if I make a mistake or there is some confusion in the stories, I apologize. Main reason is that I sometimes don't glance back at my other chapters so I tend to forget that some things occurred and somehow in the ongoing chapter it just seemed a bit… off. I will try to keep it on track as much as possible. At least you all are still with me I am grateful.

Oh, and I just watched Chrono Crusade and Naruto and I fell in love already. Next, I am going to buy Shaman King, Full metal Alchemist and One piece. Wow, if anyone knew I loved these things, they would really feel surprised. I don't look like the type of person who would dedicate her minutes with these anime sorts of movies. Yay, I am mysteriously haunted by that.

Here are my replies to my reviewers:

Cheerios68: OMG! I love this story! I can't wait til you update. Update soon please!

**Thanks for your review. Thank you for loving it and I hope you would continue to read it.**

picklezzz: you go girl! UPDATE PLEASE!

**Thanks! Don't worry, I have updated as soon as I can.**

susana: love your storys. i think that they are doing good and that you should keep going. keep me updated on when you are writing more chapters!

**A big hug for you! I want to keep you updated but its quite hard for me to tell you when the next chapter would come up. But here it is before you, enjoy!**

Megan: must say this chapter was quite catching.. Definitely surprised me when Sano showed up! Hope you add a new chapter-I'm sure Karou's POV will show her embarrassment big time because I know there would have been no way I could live that down the next day! Keep up the writing because you are doing a wonderful job on this fanfic.

**I wanted the surprise element. It gives readers the anxiety, and I am hoping I successfully created that. ****Thank you for reviewing and hope you would continue on reading.**

busuyahiko: damn good lime. damn good. i hope u will write more to this story, its hard to find a well developed and longish story like this one. this is definately going on my favorites! plz do the lemon well cuz if they arnt good than there not fun 2 read. thnx and keep up the good work.

p.s. perhaps add a vacation? (it would be very fun 4 busuyahiko 2 read.lol

**Wow, I appreciate the remark. And I love you for liking this story, if it's not too bold to say. And your idea about the vacation is pretty catchy. Let me try and squeeze some things in shall we. (I didn't really want to make this long) **

legolasEstelstar: hi sweetie! yes, i loved this chapter, and it wwas a good love scene. at least i liked it! so keep it up sweetie. i like your story. hello? i even read it again! and i noticed taht burst out you had abotu being a nerd who writes yadda yadda... well, whats wrong withwritting? if you have the talent, use it honey! that doesnt mean your one of those who have no life other than an imaginary one in the net... hm..i wonder what would those people do if the net dies? anyway, take care, and iu are a good girl, dont worry.

**Ha Ha Ha, you are one great reviewer. Thank you for your great support and I acknowledge that thank you very much. I hope you are still reading and I will be waiting for your soon review. Thanks for keeping up with me.**

kaoru2153: hugs Yay! You have finally posted more! I was begining to think that this story was dead! Please update it soon so I can add it to my list of Kenshin stories that I love again! x

**No, the story does not end here. I will NOT let that happen! LOL. ****Please continue to read and I have updated as early as I can. So enjoy**

Reignashii: wail dammit sano! it was getting hot! hahaha cool chapter! pouts he just had to interupt tho T-T that was a great chapter! loved it! tehehehehe... blush all time favorite reviewer? im honored tehehe yes i hang around a lot either cause nothing to do or to lazy to do anything else hahahaha - cringe my stories? we'll be around 90 by the time i finnally get one out to my liking hahahaha - me and my low self esteem heheehe well hopefully ill get at least ONe chapter before summer but dont get your hopes up but im trying sortof hahaha - this was an awsome chapter im looking forward to the next one!

**O my, I thought you have some written samples of your work. But that's okay. You can be my great reviewer. Just keep spouting those comments on my page. LOL. Please enjoy this updated chapter! **

bbzachariah: hey! awesome chapter! i love your fanfic. plz update sooner.

**Hey, thanks for replying! I have made progress! So here is your new chapter. Enjoy it to the fullest!**

gabyhyatt: poor ken

**well, if you are talking about Ken not having his way with Kaoru then yeah I would have to agree with you LOL. Here is the new chapter.**

OOOOOOOO

**Last Chapter:**

OOOOOOOO

It was true that in my younger years I hated to go out public. Even making out in front of other people is just not my thing, at least, not until I met Tomoe. She was strikingly different that any girls I know. She even taught me stuff that was interesting and quite pleasurable. However, I was quite thrown off when Kaoru was pretty damn confident about herself. It was hard not to fall in love with her. She was just too gorgeous…

Sano was blushing and he sat down on the sofa apologizing to me again and again and again. I wasn't listening. I was staring at the door that belongs to a woman I was very much interested in.

When Sano wouldn't stop apologizing, I glared at him and he jumped back, frightened. I guess there are limits to people. And you know guys just could not hold them for long. Curse Sano for ruining this brilliant day… I swore I was going to kill him.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

**Kaoru's POV**

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

The only feeling that lingers in my head was the fact that I felt incomplete. There was something rather different with my body. There was a huge door that was open but not completely, making me raking with anxiety. I have no idea what it is but it made me uneasy.

When I awoke the next morning, to find my cloths are still intact from last night, to find my hair frizzled with no boundaries at all, I felt very much different. Suddenly it hit me. I remembered what incident happened last night and wondered whether it was just a dream.

I took a deep breath and snaked to the door. I pressed my ear against it and tried to listen for a sound. There was none. I glanced for a moment at my room. The sun was shining through the window, signaling afternoon light. Again, I pressed my ear against the door and once I was sure there was no sign of anybody, I opened the door as slowly and silently as possible.

Like a relentless alien, I glanced right and left before proceeding towards the kitchen. With much awareness, I opened the fridge door and took the bottle of orange juice and gulped down as fast as I can.

'Hey, slow down there.'

I almost choked my orange juice. I swear it was the shock of my life. I turned around quickly to see the intruder. It was Kenshin.

Kenshin with the beautiful eyes,

Kenshin with the crumply sexy hair,

Kenshin without his T-shirt,

Kenshin with the body of an almighty god,

I swear I almost fainted. 'Jesus, Kenshin,' I gasped out while holding my chest and the juice, 'don't freak me out like that.' I flicked my eyes quickly at his cut. It wounded his skin quite deeply. Suddenly I felt guilty.

'Well, next time, don't freak me out with gulping down that juice so fast. Save some for me will you.'

He neared towards me and I blushed, recalling the past moments. But he only took the juice from my hand and poured it into his cup.

As Kenshin gulped down his juice, I was really wondering whether last night was a definite incident or not because Kenshin was acting as if nothing happened last night. I looked curiously at him and stopped staring when he finished gulping the rest of the juice. My heart suddenly wanted to burst when he eyed me with those brilliant eyes. It was thumping in my ears I knew for certain he must have heard it.

So, to hide my embarrassment, I slide past him and walked quickly to my room. But just a few more steps into my room Kenshin called me. I had to stop, but I didn't turn back. I didn't want to turn back. My cheeks were blushing red.

'Last night,' he began, but was interrupted by a sudden loud chatter of Sano, again.

'O… what a lousy morning. I feel like shit.' Sano yawned and scratched his head while making his way to the kitchen. I could feel Kenshin's glare but Sano didn't notice it. It did seem like a lousy morning. My mind was still wondering whether last night was true or not.

Sano suddenly stopped in his tracks and exchanged looks from me to Kenshin. He seemed a bit puzzled, then Sano opened his eyes and laughed nervously, 'Ha, you know I had a bizarre dream last night. I thought I saw you guys together and I was in the way and all of the sudden I was kicked by Kenshin. Man, he really did kick my ass off because he was so mad that I interrupted him. I even thought the dream was real…'

There was silence in the room. Sano seemed oblivious to the fact that Kenshin's aura is changing from pale black… to _really_ black. My face was also crimson red and my heart thumped so fast I thought it would burst in no time. Sano became speechless. He blushed and in a very awkward way, made his way towards his room.

Once Sano closed the door to his room, Kenshin looked at me. I shyly stared back. He just sighed and asked if I wanted breakfast or not. Well, more like brunch. At first I didn't respond, and then I thought twice and said yes. I should be glad that he wasn't taking yesterday's incident so serious. I mean, it wasn't serious right?

The next few minutes, I could already smell the delicious smell of bacon and eggs. I helped him with the toast and a soon was ready with the plates. We cooked in silence rather, awkwardness fulfilling the entire room I was sure Sano could feel the dreaded shivers.

As we sat down the table Kenshin ate right away. He didn't mention any word nor did I. The food seemed tasteless in my mouth. Even though Kenshin's cooking never let me down, this time I was sure I was too preoccupied that I wasn't enjoying the food like I usually do.

Finally Kenshin gave a huge sigh and put down his fork. 'Kaoru,' Kenshin began and my heart stopped a beat. I tried to penetrate my mind on the most interesting thing on the planet: my food. I knew at once that he was going to say either what had or had not happened last night. I tried to choke in my food but my anxiousness couldn't be stopped, it was stuck within my throat.

'Kenshin,' I interrupted. Every emotions and feelings kept fumbling in my mind and I want to express it in the simplest way possible. Yes, I had a hard time managing that. Kenshin looked quite shyly at me. He must be wondering what I was thinking. Managing that, and the fact that I also wanted to know what Kenshin was thinking. I need to get this all out of my system.

'Kenshin, I didn't regret what ever happened last night.'

I said it all so quickly I wasn't sure Kenshin even caught what I said. 'I mean,' I continued, 'with what you tried to do last night… it made me feel…' I looked up to meet Kenshin's gaze, '…special.'

Kenshin gave a small smile, such a genuine smile that my heart started beating again. 'Kaoru,' he said in his low husky voice, '… I thought that we had done something very… wrong last night.'

There was an awkward silence and from that much time, I felt like I was the smallest person on earth. 'But, other than that…' Kenshin continued quietly as I held my breath, '… I also… didn't regret what happened last night.'

I almost let a tear drop down. I wet my lips and suddenly didn't know how to react. I was so nervous and you readers should know because even though you haven't been in a sticky situation like this but I am sure you must have had the opportunity to experience a little awkward and nervous chilling moment. This is how I felt. I was speechless. I didn't know how to react and I didn't know if I should be happy or glad or sad.

'Well,' I started again with a quiet voice, 'I never thought that, we would end up this way. I mean… well, the fact is… I feel like I am me again… with you that is.' I giggled nervously. I paused for a second while I regain my composure, trying to disentangle my cluttered words.

'Kenshin, I never thought that I would feel alive again. What happened last night was amazing and I have to tell you honestly. I didn't regret any second of it because you made me feel very… well… extraordinary. I thought that I would never disconnect myself with my past. You gave me a lost memory at the theme park you know that? I have to thank you. Thank you for being the most wonderful and amazing person.'

I paused a moment. I didn't dare to look up at his face. I didn't want to know what his expression was like. But while he only stayed silent, all I could think were negative thoughts.

'It's just that, this is probably the first time in so many years that I have felt truly happy. Before that I was a complete wreck, wondering whether I would stand back up again. There were times when I suddenly realized just how much I have lost. I have lost my past, my desire to live. I need someone to hold on to, someone to breathe with me, someone to care and cherish every moment awake and asleep. I just need that one precious moment where I can hug and kiss and…'

There were no more words left. Kenshin swallowed it all. He pressed his lips so passionately against mine that it felt as if he sucked all the energy inside of me. I closed my eyes and gave in to the kiss. I returned his kiss with all the love and energy that I have inside of me. My heart fluttered, all of my surroundings seemed oblivious. It was this that made me realize, I was in love with Kenshin.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

**Sano's POV**

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

After I made sure the coast was clear. I head out of my room complete with my gear and helmet. I wanted to take my baby for a spin. As I neared the parking lot, I gazed lovingly at my brand new motorcycle. Sure, I was a rich dude. And yet I ran away and took my father's money with me. Being the usual ignorant me, I bought myself a great and grand motorcycle.

I adjusted my helmet and threw my body over on the leather seat. I sighed slowly, getting used to the comfortable seat of my little baby. I smiled to myself and started the engine. It gave a low grumble and with all the excitement that I had, I sped for it.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

**Megumi's POV**

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I awoke that morning with a headache. I wasn't feeling very well. Nor was I ever. After this entire incident, I hadn't actually experienced anything more than sad. I was below that. I was beyond helpless… I felt like dying.

These past few weeks had been the worst ever. When I realized that I was pregnant, I did what every pregnant young teenage would do… panic. I walked slowly towards the kitchen and tried to get a nice long cold drink. I had gone through many times in my head how I was going to forego this new living being inside of me.

I had spent crying for days. I was all alone. My lover didn't even care that I was pregnant. He left me alone that low life fucker. I had thought about getting an abortion but ever since Kenshin gave me the initiative to try and bring this out, I turned down that option. I needed to make sure that I didn't become like my mother, who didn't want me in the first place. I didn't even tell my mother, not with all the stress that she was going through. I didn't want to give her a heart attack. I was so panicked when she had it a couple of months ago because she was working too hard. Sure she wasn't the healthiest mom alive. But she had such low energy capacity when she was small and was brought up in a hard world. I had no father when I was born and I had spent my years under my mother's misery. If she found out I was pregnant, she would throw me out. And as much as I didn't like her, I didn't exactly hate her. She needs me and I need her.

I struggled to get to the kitchen fridge. Suddenly, there was a jolt of pain on my stomach that I cried out in agony and fell to the ground. The ache was dreadful I had tears coming from my eyes. I cringed while I tried to stand up. I need to go to the hospital. I couldn't take this anymore.

With all the strength I could muster, I struggled to stand up. I tried to take my mind off the pain and made my way as swiftly as possible to the door. My head was spinning, I couldn't even walk properly. This moment was indescribable; I thought I would collapse very soon.

Have you ever experience being under a dreadful situation where you were not sure what really happened to you? All you could feel is the soreness, terror and dreadful sensation inside of you. Everything is a haze, the ground seemed to spin and the world turned upside down. You feel like you are falling from a very high height. And no one is there to help you. You are unaided and alone. Even in a few meters there is no sight of any activity. You are alone… alone… abandoned… isolated…

…

More than ever, have I felt like this... right now…

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

**Sano's POV**

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

The wind blew swiftly and I felt like flying. I was smiling all the while I drove this baby. You couldn't get enough of the speed. Sure enough it was very addictive.

I was driving on a deserted street. I wasn't even sure exactly where I was, but I enjoyed the long and silent road of this place. There just doesn't seem to be much activity anywhere. Every few miles I would come across a few small and cozy houses. But the rest are thick sakura trees.

Imagine a long street, completely deserted. On the left and right side of the road, plant a long row of blossoming sakura trees. The wind and weather is just perfect. The sky is blue and the grass is green. What a beautiful day.

Suddenly, I noticed a figure approaching. I didn't slow my engine but I was interested to see who in the world would walk alone on this empty street. As far as I saw, there weren't much activity anyway along the street.

What I was about to discover, was the figure of the person that I had always tried to meet again. I passed it quite quickly but I noticed that long black silky hair. Without a moment to lose, I looked back just in time to see her drop down to the ground.

I slammed my brakes and made a very narrow turn. The tire made squeaky noise along the asphalt. I didn't care. I held my breath as I came past the figure that seemed so helpless and in pain.

She was on the ground now, holding her stomach and her face was twisted in pain. Her long dark hair was all tangled on her beautiful face and her breathing was very heavy. When I finally approached her, I kneeled down and quickly tried to hold her up to see her face, wondering what was wrong.

She discovered my face of worry and confusion, only to meet a pale and hurting face. It was her: Megumi. I tried to lift her up and said, 'what's wrong? What happened?'

She didn't respond. Her eyes were half closed and this worried me even more. Without a moment of wavering I lifted her up and carried her to my motorcycle. This woman was supposed to be feisty with me, but with all this, I knew it was serious. I struggled to get her on my bike but I finally made it and kicked the gas. Then I drove with all my might, leaving skid marks on the black asphalt. I drove as fast as I could, ignoring signs and warnings. I drove along the beautiful cherry blossoms when I knew it was a beautiful day. But my mind was not there. I was sick with worry. To me right now, I was sucked into a puddle of pink petals that I envisioned to be a blood bath.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

**Megumi's POV**

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I wasn't sure whether I was dreaming or not. Nor had I thought that what had happen, actually occurred. I only remembered the gentle wind blowing my hair, a soft and warm embrace supported with toned and muscled body. Surprisingly, the pain went away, as if just those silent touches diminished the pain.

I awoke slowly. I tried to lift my heavy eyes. My vision still blurred. I tried to open my eyes again; still it was too heavy to open. Every time I tried, my head started to spin, so I stopped a moment before trying again.

I could hear something beeping, a smell of cleanliness and sanitized reeked. It was all too familiar. I had to open my eyes again. As hard as I tried, I opened my eyes. For a moment, I could not see anything. It was all too blurry.

Suddenly the pain in my stomach began to initiate that I groaned in pain, barely making a noise. I clutched hard at the uncontaminated linen as I again tried to open my eyes. I could hear whispers. Initially, the room was clear. I was not surprised to be sleeping at the hospital bed. It was a clean and white room, the familiar smell of sterilized air touched my senses and I felt the pang of horrible memories that suddenly came to my head. I hated the hospital. I never wanted to set foot on it again.

Sweat was pouring over my head, my breathing labored and the pain in my stomach would not subside. I had to get out of here. With much force and difficulty and sat up, only to find a needle in my skin. I realized what it is and before I could stop it, those memories sprang back.

I was wet in sweat, my breathing became more erratic, the beeping of the machine sounded louder and faster. I tried to gasp and get a hold of myself, trying to capture some air, but the pain got even more intense. I closed my eyes and held my ears with my hands. Stop! Stop that noise. Get away! Get away! I don't want to be here. The pain is still with me; I winced with pain and wanted to yell. My head kept screaming, those pulse noise kept getting louder and louder and faster and faster. I felt suffocated. Help me! Help me! Somebody help me!

'MEGUMI!'

Everything stopped.

There was a voice, a very familiar voice. I could hear nothing but that voice. I had to see who made that voice. I had to, I had to.

'Megumi… it's okay… everything is alright.'

A sudden warm feeling came over me. The pain seemed to recede. I carefully open my eyes. There I saw him. The man whom that hopeful voice belonged to. His beautiful face turned to worry. He looked at me in a pitiful way that without my own will, tears came down. Crystal tears sprang from my eyes. I unconsciously let myself cry without knowing why. But the way he looked at me, the way he held my hand and said nice things reassured me. Suddenly I felt comfortable.

I smiled weakly at him, trying to stop these tears but it kept flowing. He then held me with his arms, embracing my body against his and then and there I felt peace. It is unbelievable how much at peace I felt with just one hug. I dug my head deeper into his shirt, sniffing his musky scent. It felt so perfect being held by his body, a jolt of warmth spread throughout, cleansing all the pain. I held him closer, clutching the back of his shirt more tightly. Why I am here, I do not know why? I astoundingly felt very frightened. But just his presence made me serene.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

**Sano's** **POV**

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I had been wondering all day whether our meeting had been a fateful one. When the doctor explained to me what happened, I felt more responsible for the whole event. The doctor kept clarifying everything that was wrong with the woman inside that white room. The doctor then exclaimed that if I hadn't brought her here in time, the circumstances might be worse than this.

I nodded to indicate to him that I understood what he said. Then he asked for her parents, and this I do not know. This news has surely surprised me, but I wasn't so sure that Megumi's parents should know about this, heck, I wasn't even sure she even told her parents about her implacable situation.

I went into the room after the doctor bid farewell and I stared at her lifeless figure, asleep within that clean and white linen. She looked so afraid when she woke up; I felt a pang of pity. It was a good thing she settled down and fell back asleep again.

I sat in the chair, leaning against the window, the bright evening light stretched into the room. The smell still wafted in the air. I knew that I had to tell her the news after she had awoken and felt more comfortable. She needed to know… but why does it have to be me who has to tell her?

I bent down and held my head with my hands. Today had been a misfortunate day. I believe it must be fate. I glanced at the woman before me. She looked so frail and white, I want to help her. She seemed so lonely, even the other day's incident, I still felt a deep feeling for her. Then again, I felt very much responsible, that I should be thankful or not.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

**Megumi's** **POV**

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I awoke to find Sanosuke, sleeping with his head against the window. He looked so fatigued. He must be… after he rescued me, no matter what I was now connected to him. I should be thankful. But if he knew something that I don't want him to know, then I would be in a very difficult position.

'So, you are awake?'

I was surprised at his voice. His head was still resting against the window, but his eyes were locked to mine. I breathed out in relieve. I felt a strange feeling drawn at just the sight of his figure. There was something captivating about him.

'Yes… I'm afraid so…'

Then there was silence. Wasn't he going to tell me what happened? I hoped he did not call my mom. Even if he did, she wouldn't be around. She would spend the night at her boyfriend's place. She wouldn't even care if I was here in the hospital.

'…tell me…' I started with a quite voice. I was frightened to hear what he had to say but I had to know.

Sano did not say anything at first but looked away and seemed very fascinated with the flowers that I only noticed now. There was a bouquet of roses on my desk and I desired to know who it was from.

'I don't want to be an intruder in your life.' He said slowly and quietly. The room's atmosphere became more intense.

'…tell me…' I said again.

Sano was silent; he seemed to not want this conversation. 'Tell me,' I said demandingly.

Sano closed his eyes and sighed deeply before explaining. 'The doctor said… there is something you are carrying… isn't it? There is another life inside of you.' I clutched my hands against the sheets. Sweat started to fall. Sano paused for a moment.

'Yes… continue?'

'That life inside of you… will no longer be growing…'

I felt a bolt of pain spread inside my chest that strikes me deep within my heart. There was ringing in my ears and I could feel a huge lump forming in my throat. '…what… do you mean…?' I barely whispered.

'You will no longer have a baby. If you do not remove it soon, your body will be contaminated.'

There it was, that fearful news that I had been waiting for. It just washed away all hope inside of me. I could feel the pain again in my stomach and I clasped my hands more tightly against the sheets. There was more than splinter in my heart. I thought I could bear the news but it was more that I could abide. I held my face down and wanted to reach for support. Tears began forming in my eyes. I tried to choke in the feeling. I almost wanted to burst. There was a huge knot forming inside my throat that I want to let go. I need to let go. I need to let go.

There it was… I cried. Hot tears ran down my cheeks faster than ever. A wave of fear and darkness began to flood my whole body. I felt more helpless than I could ever imagine. I was engulfed by the sudden news that it raked my body and I cried in pain.

I could see nothing, feel nothing. Not until Sano draped his arms around my body. He hugged me tightly and adhered to him for my dear life. I cried deeply within his shirt, shaking and quivering. I was lost. I felt terribly lost. I thought I could continue living with a new life that is borne. I thought that I could fix it. I thought I could amend all the things that have gone wrong in my life. Sano supported me. He held me close in his arms as my tears soaked his shirt.

I was lost… confused… alone…

… Abandoned…

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

**Kenshin'sPOV **

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Later the next day I had a phone call from Sano. He explained what happened to Megumi and being the worrying person I am, I told Kaoru about this. She replied only by looking at me in horror. Without another word, we knew what to do. Immediately, she brought all the necessary things she could find and ride to her as fast as I can.

Kaoru didn't say much along the ride, but there had been some disturbing connections between the two. They both used to be best friends, but Megumi had made a slight traitor ship that ended up with both of them getting hurt. But whatever happened, Kaoru still worry about her and I know how she felt.

We neared the hospital and we ran as fast as we can. As we came towards the entrance door, there was not much more to say. Kaoru stood for a minute or two before she sighed and opened the door.

There she was, fallen asleep within that white linen. Her face looked so forlorn. There was a pained expression on her white and ashen face. There were dark bags around her eyes showing just how much distraught and troublesome burden she must be carrying.

Kaoru neared her, quite frightened at her own feelings. I myself regarded this situation, frankly, quite disturbing, but I don't want to see someone important to Kaoru look like this. Megumi handled her situation with bravery and pride which justified that she shouldn't go through this alone. She needed all the help she needed. And right now, the only person who is willing to help is Kaoru.

'Megumi,' Kaoru called quietly. Megumi didn't respond.

She then turned to Sano, 'so… how did she react?'

Sano looked down and sighed, 'Not so good. Even though she's not over it, yet she is trying so hard to keep it all in… I'm surprised she can live through with this…'

Kaoru nodded, 'Yes… but I wasn't even sure having the baby would be a good idea or not… at least now she isn't carrying any larger burden.'

'Yes, but she regarded that baby as a sign of hope,' I interrupted. Kaoru looked at me, I continued, 'she told me everything about it and I think you should know about it too.'

Kaoru walked slowly up to me and stared curiously and warily, 'what do you mean?'

'Well… that baby was conceived because she eloped with…' I stopped in mid sentence. I couldn't continue. Sano was looking at me curiously. There was something odd from his gaze. Kaoru was staring at me hard. I thought that she knew the answer even if I hadn't told her. She started to breathe quite loudly. Kaoru faced the ground and clutched her fist tightly. There was an eerie energy flowing through her and I couldn't help but stand back.

'Kenshin,' Kaoru said with a strange tone of voice, 'she told you? But she didn't tell me?'

'How could she when she knows your relationship with him?'

Kaoru didn't respond. She was shaking; her whole body is emitting a sign on uncertainty. I sighed and came up to her, only to drape my arms around her, circling her with security. She was crying silently and I knew how heartbreaking this is. It was all Yukimura's doing and I was holding back the urge to fight with him once more. He had done enough. First it was Kaoru, and then he would do that to her best friend.

'It's all… my fault,' Kaoru whispered against my shirt. I shushed her and held her more tightly, 'No, no, no. Don't ever think like that. It was never your fault in the beginning.' I said, trying to reassure her.

'It was…' Kaoru cried again, 'if I hadn't been so stupid I would've ended it right then and there. If I knew this was going to happen I would…'

'Shush… It is NOT your fault okay? It was never your fault.'

I tried to calm Kaoru down for the next five minutes. She was taking all of this as her fault. I never measured it in that perspective. Kaoru felt conscientious to be responsible. Finally, she recuperated herself and spoke quietly to Sano, 'so… when will she be having the operation?'

'The doctor said it should be around 6 in the evening. They have a long queue in the operating area. The doctor also needed to diagnose her symptoms again. They said that there might be some more damages but they will be facing the answer soon. They will tell us as soon as possible.'

Kaoru only nodded and looked back at Megumi. I gazed at Sano with a concerned expression. There was something odd about the way Sano is treating this state of condition. I was always aware at his weird behavior. He was staring at Megumi peculiarly too. There was an atypical gaze of apprehension and caring that he emanated every time he stared at her.

But I needed to talk to him. As Kaoru was busy with Megumi, I signaled Sano with my usual stare and he comprehended. I beckoned him with my usual gaze and he followed me out of the room.

'We have a sticky situation here.' Sano exclaimed once I shut the door. 'That man wants to be killed. He made two innocent human beings suffer. I cannot let this happen. I cannot.' Sano was punching me with those sentences and I wondered what made him so upset. I was sensing it had something to do with Megumi.

'So now you know how I feel,' I said. 'I don't know how Kaoru and Megumi are going to keep up. All I know is that Yukimura is willing to fight for her… just for the money cause.'

Sano was silent. 'You know the holidays would be pretty hard to administer. We have to be aware 24/7. Once the holiday starts we can keep an eye on those two.'

I smiled. I realized an idea that kept stirring in my head. 'You know what… why don't we all go for a break. You know, find some time to let it all out of the system. Let's venture out of this joint and make sure we have our clan waiting for us there.'

Sano was still. He was looking at me dubiously. 'So now you're thinking of heading back. I thought you said you were never going to touch our hometown again?'

I looked at Sano with inspiring eyes. 'Yes, but see we have a base there and we have our clan to cooperate with us. We can intertwine a contract with _The Devil's Cry_ to get some back up. It would be better than the two of us together.'

'But Yukimura works alone.'

'Who knows who he works for? All I know is that he must have a connection with the police. Why else wouldn't Kaoru inform the police? Surely you know how fucking corrupted they are. _The Devil's Cry_ is quite cooperative when it comes to law enforcement situations…' I paused. 'Besides… there is something that I need to do.'

Sano nodded in understanding. He knew my past and why I ran away. So what? Tomoe had run away and I wouldn't think she would ever come back into my life. My cowardice so called best friend would probably be very _anxious_ if I don't meet him soon… and I still have to settle things with my parents.

I glanced at the door and took a peek through the glass window. Kaoru was holding her hands with Megumi. She was still asleep but she is glowing. It must be because of the comforting presence of Kaoru.

Kaoru and Megumi could come too. They can be protected by _The Devil's Cry_ for as long as the holiday. They would help her settle things with Yukimura Kensuke. Of course they would… I _was_ their leader. It is time to face my past.

* * *

Hm, well… Hm…

So tell me, just how ridiculous this story is… please tell me the truth. I like the whole idea with the vacation thing but quite frankly, I have lost track of time these people are in…

I recall there was summer… and I think now should be autumn… they do have autumn holidays right? Actually, I wanted this so called vacation in December when the snow would fall and exotic scenes would brilliance in the story.

Okay so I made some mistakes here and there so please tell me. I only had ten reviews and I was quite disappointed. But never fear, I will try my best to continue.

O, I made another story called **irreplaceable to the heart**, inspired by the manga _'wild acts,_' but I never really continued with it. Then because I was soooo fascinated by chrono crusade and Naruto… I wanted to create a story on both these anime… ho ho ho… cheers people

Lots of love and happy Chinese New Year.

Gong Xi Fat Chai.


	18. A sudden encounter with the past

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 18: A sudden encounter with the past**

Big apology again for my fellow readers. I can't stop but saying sorry. But here is an update from me!!!! Please Read and Review!!!!

So I liked the idea of the vacation thing and it would be great to get these lovely love birds out of the city. It would also broaden up their scope since their little lives are always surrounded here.

Get ready to open up to Kenshin's past, his ex best friend, his parent's, and the one that I am very looking forward to, _The Devil's Cry_…

* * *

**Author's note**: Okay, I've never been to Japan but I have friends there and they told me a little bit about the life in Japan. I was told that Osaka was a great place and Tokyo is the poll for an even better place. Okay, so they are staying in Kyoto but they are now riding away to Tokyo… let's see whether I get any of this correct. Sincere apologies.

* * *

**Special note:** I've heard that in the cinemas, they have a special price for couples and they get to sit in the love seat. I also heard that the cinema is sophisticatedly as big as a theatre arts podium. Maybe it can hold up to 500 or more people. I also heard they have this card in exchange for cash. And you can but Disneyland tickets in places like 7/11… oh, how I wish I can come up there…

* * *

**To my lovely reviewers:**

**Lyptha:** Hello and very nice to meet you. I really hope you enjoy this next chapter. And I hope you haven't forgotten the story. I have to reread it again after I left it for a couple of months. But I enjoy your comment. Keep reading and reviewing! Jya

**Inukensgurl**:Hey!!! Guess what!!! I have used some of your idea into this story. Actually, I was planning on putting someone in Devil's Cry. Makes the character more believable. LOL. Thanks for reviewing. BIG HUG

**Kcrystallights:** Oh I think I have disappointed you by not updating this as soon as possible. You should become a member and make this story on your alert lists so you know when I am updating things. BIG HUG. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

**Reignashii:** Yesh, now I have updated. After such a long time!!!! LOL. Well, contaminated just means that if the dead baby inside of her isn't taken out, then her body will get infected. That's why they need to take it out of her. And I heard it really hurts. Feels like part of body is being removed from your body. I know that because my mother had that. I hope u are still reading, my all time favorite reviewer 'Grins.' Ill be updating. Cheers

* * *

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­OOOOOO

Last chapter:

OOOOOO

I glanced at the door and took a peek through the glass window. Kaoru was holding her hands with Megumi. She was still asleep but she is glowing. It must be because of the comforting presence of Kaoru.

Kaoru and Megumi could come too. They can be protected by _The Devil's Cry_ for as long as the holiday. They would help her settle things with Yukimura Kensuke. Of course they would… I _was_ their leader. It is time to face my past.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

'Go back to Tokyo?' I glanced at Kenshin who was sipping his tea. We were sitting at the hospital lounge. The time now is 7.30 pm and Megumi was at the operating room. While Megumi is in the operating room, Kenshin began telling me his plan of going back to his hometown as an act of vacation as well as straightening things out with his past. I measured the consequences and thought about our safety. I wouldn't think Yukimura would act soon. He is way too cautious about these things.

I took another sip from my tea and breathed a sigh. I postulated that by going to Tokyo wouldn't hurt. It would give me a chance to delve into a new city for a change. I had been caged in this place since eternally.

'You know what?' I smiled sanguinely at Kenshin. 'I think it would be a great idea.'

Kenshin only smiled in response. His masculinity figure made me secure. Just by Kenshin being here with me is enough. I want to go back with him.

'By the way,' I started, 'who are these: _The Devil's Cry_?'

Sano laughed heartily, 'the highest ranking group of ragingly obsessive teenage population that is feared by many people in Tokyo.' There he stopped and smiled mischievously. I was very curious.

'As in, like a mafia kind of thing?'

'No, we don't kill people for that matter. We don't traffic drugs either. We are way too proud to do those things.' Sano continued, 'Let's just say that we try to defend ourselves from charlatan and corrupters. It's about brotherhood. We support and understand each other. I presume, we knew each other more than ourselves. To put it simply, it's a gang of wild teenagers.' Sano snickered, 'We enjoy a little blood bath as well.'

'Sano,' Kenshin interrupted, his eyes fixated on the floor, but I could feel his black rage, 'I suggest you shut your mouth.'

Sano slumped in his chair and snorted. 'Chillaks man,' Sano remarked.

I gulped and looked vigilantly at Kenshin. 'So,' I said again, 'if we go there, there will be accommodation and…'

'… Everything is going to be provided.' Kenshin interjected. 'You don't have to worry. Even the transportation is all settled. All you need to do is gather your belongings and get ready to move out of here after the school ends.'

I smiled circumspectly, trying to judge what Kenshin's mood is. I would be more than happy to accompany Kenshin to go back. I looked at Sano, who was busily trying to play a game on his loud hand phone, and then thought about Megumi. With a few days in the hospital she would be as good as new. Besides, we only have a few more days until the two weeks holiday…

So for two weeks I would be leaving this place. I was stirring in anxiety. I wanted to leave… More than ever…

I smiled to myself and sat back on the hospital sofa and started to think to myself.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Sano's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

It had already been three hours. Now I was sitting beside Megumi, who had fallen asleep. Her face didn't look that glamorous the first time I saw her, but something visible enough for me to capture is her ravishing hope on her expression. She looked peaceful, as if a great huge burden had been lifted from her soul.

Kenshin and Kaoru bid farewell half an hour ago. Kaoru was rather worried about Megumi. She insisted to stay back but I didn't allow her. I told her to go home. Damn as well, I think Kenshin figured something out already. I guess my will to stay back to take care of Megumi had been quite alarming to him. I smiled weakly at myself. I guess by now I should realize it too. I had been drawn by the beautiful figure before me. The first time I met her was intensifying enough I pledged to see her again.

I stared again at Megumi. Her long dark hair contrasted the white linen of the hospital bed sheets. Her face was quite ashen but she had a glow. It was a shine that I was very much fascinated with. It drew me to her, capturing my soul. I couldn't stop staring at her.

… Yukimura…

I gripped tightly at the handle of the chair. I breathed deeply. It was his entire fault. Anger kept raging and fuming inside of me and I tried to tone it down. I was very good at keeping grudges, which is probably one of my weaknesses. That low life shit should be ready to be challenging an ex of _Devil's Cry_. He should know by now who he was facing. I gripped even harder at the handle, trying to restrain all the excited energy from inside of me. I need to calm down. Yukimura would soon get a piece. Yes, he would definitely. I assure him of that…

* * *

OOOOOOOOO

2 weeks later

OOOOOOOOO

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Yes, it was finally the holidays. I awoke that morning with a huge smile on my face. Two weeks went by quite quickly. Now it was over. It was time to liberate ourselves from this cage.

I quickly got out of bed and took my things to get ready into the bathroom. It was quite late but I bumped into a figure just when I opened the bathroom door. It was Kenshin. He only had a towel covering his assets and we were both startled to find my face very close to his steamed muscular chest.

I gulped and noticed Kenshin's evoking smile. I quickly stepped back and muttered a word of sorry, trying very hard to hide my face. He only chuckled and took a step forward. My heart beats faster and faster every few inch that drew him closer to me. Soon, I was caged by one of his arms, his whole body cowering over mine. I felt like a helpless animal. He face inched closer to my face and he captured my lips.

I gasped in surprise but soon gave into the moment. His hair was wet, and so was his face. I tasted peppermint and a smell of lovely flowers that drifted from his wholesome body. I struggled to kick back to my senses but all I could feel is his gentle lips against mine. He leaned closer to me, our body nearly touching. I moaned in pleasure as he took my tongue and danced together. I savored his scent and taste in my mouth as I kissed him back. My hands slowly went up his torso, soaking my hands from his after shower. I was turned on already. Man, how he could do that to me.

'Get a room.'

The voice startled me and I glanced over to see Sano standing with an annoying look plastered on his face. It seemed he just woke up. I blushed severely. Kenshin moved away from me and called out to Sano, 'I would if you wouldn't interfere.'

As Sano began to talk back, I wanted to hide. I had to get to the bathroom. But before I turned around, Kenshin put his hand against my butt and squeezed it. Then he walked towards Sano and pretended nothing happened and that he had just done something very natural.

I stood frozen for a minute, not really knowing what to do. My face was washed with red blush and I never thought it would become even redder when Kenshin took a small glance at me and winked hotly.

That was it.

I gathered my things and headed straight for the bathroom. As soon as I locked it I leaned against the door and breathed a sigh. I touched my cheeks and cursed myself for being so pathetic of my lack of control. I should be able to handle these things fairly quickly. I guess Kenshin caught me off guard.

Well, lesson learnt. If he wants to be naughty… we hello buster… so will I….

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Megumi's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

'Here, let me lend you a hand.'

Sano smiled brightly at me as he took my luggage. My cheeks blushed reddened a little and muttered a small thank you before turning away. We were outside Kenshin's apartment building. There were people busying themselves, all smiling happily. It was the holidays anyway. The sun was shining brilliantly and the wind was perfect. The momiji autumn leaves brilliantly shone in the afternoon sunlight.

'Hey Megumi,' Kaoru called carrying a huge bag. I smiled at her. We had become best friends again since I was hospitalized. Kaoru was smiling so warmly, I never thought she would forgive me for the awful things that I had done to her these couple of months. I'm glad she's not arrogant about it too… I admire her sincerity.

'Kaoru, look out!' I called at her just before she tripped and fell. I groaned to myself. She is still as clumsy as ever. I ran towards her, offering a help but stopped in my tracks when Kenshin immediately came to her aid. I smiled to myself. She already has her prince charming.

I chuckled softly and walked towards the taxi. Sano finished arranging the baggage and closed the trunk. I noticed him smiling to himself. I neared him, eager to be close.

'She is always that clumsy isn't she?' Sano said to me as I took out a lipstick from my purse.

'You have no idea,' I answered, applying lipstick to my now healthy lips, 'you're given a treat every now and then.' I pursed my lips and put back the lipstick inside my purse, 'life is never bored with her around.'

We both watched Kenshin helping Kaoru to her feet.

'Yeah, but she is a handful,' Sano said before he came to help them with Kaoru's luggage.

I stared at Sano, who easily lifted that huge luggage and couldn't help but blush. My heart beats even faster when he walked towards me with his cute hair nearly closing his eyes. Man, he is so hot.

We never really had the time to start any real conversation since my outburst about how men are all malevolent. Yet, I wasn't really bullshitting. There are many unpleasant nicks in my life that I found it was hard now to trust any man. This new found young man before me was there to save my life. I had no other choice but be in his debt. No matter how much I despise men, he and Kenshin were those special beings that I now considered exceptions.

'Okay let's go,' Sano beamed brightly and it was hard for me not too blush. His over energetic personality sure does bring brightness in your life… pretty much whether you like it or not.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I heard Kaoru gasped and chuckled softly as she gazed through the taxi window of all the glorious sights in Tokyo. We were passing the Shinjuku district where all the attraction places congregate. Two and a half hours of waiting and finally we were able to indulge in Megumi's and Kaoru's over eager rejoinder towards the city. The streets were bustling with busy people, more than I could count. Everyone was every where. The city was busy as always.

We turned a corner and finally got a full view of the Tokyo Metropolitan Government Office or so called Tocho and heard Kaoru gasped some more. I tired not to burst out laughing. I looked back to find Kaoru sticking nearly half her body out from the window.

'Hey Kaoru, get your butt in here at once.' I yelled at her. She looked at me and smirked, and then she continued gaping at the towers.

'Oh my Megumi, Kenshin, Sano,' Kaoru batted her hand in front of Sano's face who was sitting right next to her to get our attention. Sano annoyingly shook Kaoru's hands away as she laughed brightly at the beautiful sight of the Shinjuku Central Park. The momiji leaves were burning red, firing away its humble beauty. I sat back, defeated by Kaoru's overwhelming excitement.

'Oh my,' Kaoru squealed again and batted her hands again that it hit Sano straight in the eye and he yelped in silent curses. Kaoru merely ignored him and bore her eyes deeper into the soul of the Shinjuku district. Megumi and I laughed it all as we head our way to the apartment that I rented for the next few weeks.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I was very much excited about this whole trip. Everyone seemed to be so tired and sleepy but I wanted to explore even more.

'Maybe we should give her drugs,' Sano whispered to Kenshin as I tore open the window to small but homey apartment and breathed in the new scent.

'Oh my you guys,' I said as my eyes targeted on a ramen stall just opposite of the apartment. The smell is so intoxicating that my stomach rumbled. 'Oh please, after this let's go and eat at that ramen stall. Please o please?' I whined at them with my large animated puppy eyes.

'I think you should get some sleep Kaoru,' Kenshin said to her. I frowned in annoyance, 'it's my first day here in the real world and you're telling me to sleep?'

Sano made an uh-oh sound before running off in another direction. Kenshin merrily walked up to her and explained, 'it's just that we have a big day tomorrow and I don't want you to feel tired.'

'I'm not tired,' I backed up, 'come on, can't we just have a split second for a bowl of nice hot ramen.' I looked at his eyes intently, making him realize what I want.

'I can come with you Kaoru,' Megumi called from behind them. She threw her bag to the table near the door and placed her hands to her hips, 'well, well, well. No too shabby.' She looked around the area with gleam in her eyes and I felt even more excited.

'Oh yes,' I jumped up and down, 'let's go now Megumi.'

Before Megumi could react, I took her arms and dashed away from the apartment, leaving Kenshin and Sano to experience boredom in their new humble a dome.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kenshin's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I laughed sincerely as I watched Megumi's startled face as she was practically dragged out of the house by Kaoru. She looked so much happier than before, I thought.

'I guess we better deal with them later,' Sano came into the living room, scratching his head, 'when are we going to meet the gang.'

I sighed and took a seat on the comfy sofa. 'So what's the plan?' Sano asked and sat on the chair opposite me.

'Well,' I started slowly, frowning somewhat, 'first of all, we have to see the _Devil's Cry_ and formulate a proposition. I don't think they will be too happy to see me.'

Sano nodded in agreement and sniffed, 'you got that right. Those lazy shit heads are just using the name to make people scared.' I nodded too in agreement, 'I agree but they are a good source of power if they are willing to be our allies.'

'Plus, we can't really find any other help from the rest of the squad. We're the strongest in Tokyo,' Sano replied too, folding his arms. 'That's how you come in handy Sano.'

Sano chuckled, 'I'm everything to you man. You sure can't live without me.' I rolled my eyes but didn't deny the verity because I knew what he said was true.

'That's a first. The second thing we need to do is get to see my parents. I need to settle things between them.' I leaned forwards and used my arms to support by upper body and spoke with a quiet voice, 'then… I need to see her.'

Sano looked at me with curious eyes, 'you sure about that.' I guess the whole idea of coming up here in the first place was to have the gang help us out. But there was a part of me that kept screaming to come back and see her. There is a part of me that is worried for her. 'Yes,' I flatly said and leaned back against the sofa. Sano didn't say any more. He just nodded and got up to unpack.

* * *

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Kaoru's POV

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I squirmed in delight and filled my lungs with the smell of intoxicating smell of street ramen. Megumi only stared as I started to squeeze every bit of noodle into my mouth as possible.

'Calm down girl, the world isn't gonna end soon,' Megumi stated as she slurped on her own noodles.

'This is delicious,' I beamed and smiled at the food vendor and he waved back. Megumi smiled and relished these happy moments.

'So,' Megumi started, 'may I know what the deal it is between you and Kenshin.' I choked as soon as Megumi hit those words. Megumi just smiled and watched my reaction get back to me.

'What do you mean?' I asked innocently but she wasn't buying it. 'You know what I mean,' Megumi only replied, not taking off her eyes from me. I shivered at her gaze.

I sighed and stopped eating the delicious ramen in front of me licked my lips. 'I think it's pretty obvious Megumi. You know how I feel about him,' I meekly said. 'But… I'm just… scared.'

'What are you afraid of?' Megumi whispered.

What am I afraid of? I thought back. Those amazing moments we both shared, the dangerous times when he saved me from that dreadful place, the amazing connection when we almost made love. We were a vision of two people in love, no questions asked.

But before I could answer I heard a sound of a man yelling behind the ramen stall. The owner was startled and quickly walked towards the noise. The costumers were all confused and they all looked at the scene of a man flying to the ground just in front of the entrance. I was curious. Megumi was going to stop me from leaving my seat but I ignored her and went out of the stall.

A middle aged man was lying on the dirty ground and he was struggling to stand up. I felt a surge of pity and sympathy for this man and before I could run to help him, I saw a small group of young men standing before him, towering above him like a dark cloud.

The man was breathing heavily and avoided the young men's eyes. 'Where is the money?' a man, who seem to be the boss, said rudely and spat to the ground near the old man's face. The man squirmed. 'I swore I gave it to you,' the old man nervously replied and he hid his face from the faces that stared at him, 'I left it behind the garbage dump like you told me. It was probably stolen or---'

The boss looked angry and he kicked the man in the stomach and yelled, 'then where the hell is the money you mother fucker?'

I became infuriated at the confrontation and without thinking further, I gathered myself and stood in front of the old man and faced the boss while holding my hands in the air, making sure he knew the message that I was going to stop him.

The boss towered before me and looked at me with his ridiculously ugly expression. 'What do you want, puss?' he growled as I confidently stared back at him. For a moment my timidity diminished from my head and I felt a surge of hatred towards this man. 'Go away,' I said to him.

The boss snickered and looked at me from head to toe, 'you look like a sweet sugar fuck. Wanna come home with daddy?'

At this I threw my hand and punched him in the face. I was startled at my own reaction as the man groaned and touched his cheek with his hand. 'That hurt bitch,' he angrily said.

The man started to walk towards me and my senses wouldn't cooperate with me. But before he could attack, I heard a deep voice of a man behind me, 'don't do it Gonzo.'

The man stopped and looked behind me and his attitude altered a bit. I turned around to see a man, standing in front of a bigger group of young men wearing the same black clothes with a red colored trimming on their collar. He had dark hair and dark eyes. I realized his deadly aura emitting from his body that it made my spine shiver and sweat started to trickle down my forehead.

'So what, you're telling me what to do now?' the man, whose name seemed to be Gonzo, said.

The tall and dark figure behind me didn't speak a single word but he captured Gonzo's eyes and made him look like the smallest person in the world. Gonzo looked a bit frightened but he raised his chin and walked back as he pointed his finger to the young man behind me, 'this isn't over yet you mother fucker.'

And at that, Gonzo and his team left the place and I let out a sigh of relief. I helped the man stand on his feet as he kept thanking me and the young hero. I blushed as Megumi came to see if I got hurt. I shook my head and stared at the young man with black clothing.

The man looked at me with an intimidating face but when I gazed into his eyes, I don't feel menace. I felt a sense of ease and security flowing through me.

'Hey let's go back,' Megumi's voice was at the back of my head. I couldn't stop staring at him. He blinked his eyes, stared at me with that intensifying gaze one last time and walked back. I watched his figure slowly dissolved within his own team mates as they began to disappear into the crowd.

* * *

OOOOOOOOOOOOOO

So, do you have any idea who that character might be? Oh come on, you all should know who it is!!!!

Okay, starting from tomorrow I have a one week holiday so I will be spending more time on my stories. LOL. I haven't been the best writer and I hate deadlines so consider this a treat.

**Note: I won't be updating as long as I get 10 reviews and above. And I mean it 'grins.' **

**That's why hit the blue button and say a couple of words. It won't hurt. I dare ya to!!!!**


	19. The Devil's Cry

**Controlling emotions**

**FreyA-wings**

**Chapter 19: The Devil's Cry

* * *

**

**I guess having more than 3 reviews is okay. I'm sorry. It's my fault for not writing this story sooner. You have to forgive me because not only was this one hard to write, but I have a major project due in two weeks. I promise I will finish this. Thank you all for reviewing. Kenshin and Kaoru forever!!!!!**

**diddi**: yes I have updated. That's right. I don't care how many reviews I get as long as I finish this story. Thanks Diddi for reviewing. BIG HUG

**Inukensgul:** hahahaha… you can guess and the answer is in this chapter. More of the devil's cry will come later in the other chapters. Thanks for reviewing. Keep reading. BIG HUG!

**Lyptha:** well, just read the story and you'll find out LOL. Thank you so much for encouraging me. I hope this story finishes. Thanks a lot. BIG HUG

* * *

**OOOOOOOO**

**Last Chapter**

**OOOOOOOO**

The man looked at me with an intimidating face but when I gazed into his eyes, I don't feel menace. I felt a sense of ease and security flowing through me.

'Hey let's go back,' Megumi's voice was at the back of my head. I couldn't stop staring at him. He blinked his eyes, stared at me with that intensifying gaze one last time and walked back. I watched his figure slowly dissolved within his own team mates as they began to disappear into the crowd.

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

**Kenshin's POV**

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

I watched Kaoru's odd behavior as we settled down for the night. She was rather quiet and dreamy after she and Megumi ate at the ramen stall. The time was nearing midnight and I was still awake.

I stood up and saw Sano, groaning in his dream. I chuckled to myself. His figure in his sleep is way too dorky than when he's awake.

I went out of bed and walked out of the bedroom door, carefully closing the door as I walked out. I went to the fridge slowly and was about to open the fridge door when I noticed a figure sitting behind the window, staring at the scenery beyond the glass window. I recognized the silhouette. It was Kaoru.

Curious, I went up to her figure and she noted my presence behind her and looked up without feeling surprised. I was a tad confused when I looked into her eyes and found the emotions twisting inside of her that I wasn't familiar with. 'Kenshin,' she approved my presence and I sat down next to her.

'What are you doing up this late?' I asked in a low voice. Kaoru stared back out the window, 'I was just curious.'

I frowned and wondered which one of us was really curious. 'What's wrong?' I asked. Kaoru dropped her head and settled her body around the corner of the window sill. They both could hear the traffic and the busy noise out in the streets.

'I just couldn't sleep. I keep thinking about…' Kaoru stopped in mid sentence and I was inquisitive to know what she was going to say next. Kaoru looked into my eyes and I melted away with that gaze. _I think I am so much in love with her_, I thought to myself as the traffic lights shone on her face, the shadow slowly diminished in her face shadow. She was staring intently at me and for the first time ever, we felt like we don't need to verbally communicate.

'So who is the _Devil's Cry_?' Kaoru asked with a whisper, 'Am I going to see them?'

I licked my lips and shook my head, 'no… no you won't.'

'Why not?' She simply asked with an innocent questioning look.

I didn't break her gaze and I still drowned in her eyes. 'Because of my past,' I whispered. Kaoru tilted her head. I made a small and weak smile and Kaoru bit her lip. She leaned forward from the corner of the window sill and wrapped her arms around my waist. She leaned her head on my shoulders and pressed her body against mine. I felt my insides burning and I cupped her neck with one of my hand and held the small of her back with the other. I smelt her intoxicating smell of her hair and pressed my cheeks to hers. Her skin was so soft and fragile, I kissed it. She moaned a little and I pressed my lips against her earlobe. I could feel Kaoru shiver underneath my touch and I felt a huge desire within me.

But I stopped it. I kissed her cheeks again and pushed her softly aside. She had a curious look on her face.

'It's late,' I barely whispered. I had to stop it before I decide to bring myself upon her. I didn't think I was ready, nor was she. She slowly nodded and looked rather disappointed but I took her hand and led her to her room.

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

**Sano's POV**

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

I was fixing the black thin cloth on my forehead when Kenshin walked into the room. His face looked wary and tired and I hoped this won't affect anything that will happen after this. When he saw me he made a small smile, 'you're really worked up about this?'

I chuckled and adjusted my sweater, 'I have been waiting for this ever since we came here. It would be great to finally meet the gang.'

Kenshin followed me and changed. He drew his shirt away from his tanned golden skin, his blood red hair made a swift velvety movement on his back and I could see the mark where a deep scar was made. It was no ordinary scar. It hurt Kenshin more than just physical.

'How are the ladies?' I asked casually, wondering how Megumi was.

'I just put them to sleep,' Kenshin said as he put on a dark red shirt and black sweater.

I chuckled again, 'you sound like you were tucking them to sleep.'

Kenshin didn't respond but finished changing and he looked at me with a serious look. It was a look that I have not seen since Tomoe crashed his boat into her sea. Kenshin was home, a home he no longer thought he would go back to again. But his face showed determination and I choked a grin at him, showing I will be behind him all the time. Kenshin sighed and we both made our way out.

The time then was half past midnight and yet the streets are still gloriously bustling with diligent activities.

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

**Megumi's POV**

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

I was already awake when Kaoru and Kenshin entered their room. They were both silent and I could sense a disturbance in Kaoru's behavior. When Kenshin finally walked out, satisfied at Kaoru's sleeping figure, I immediately got up and slowly opened a few inches of the door apart, curious at Kenshin's odd expression.

Kaoru rustled in her bed sheets and I was surprised at the sudden noise. I looked back at her and smiled ruefully. Her man is about to do something very special for her, and she didn't even know it.

Smiling, I saw Kenshin and Sano appear from their bedroom with dark clothes a few minutes later. Their shadows cast a suspenseful glare and I shivered a little. Suddenly, my heart beat rapidly, a feeling of uncertainties spread throughout my body. _What if they didn't succeed?_

I gulped as they passed the living room and slowly walked out the door, their dark figures disappearing into the night. I finally closed the door and settled into my warm bed sheets. No matter how hard I tried to stop it, I was really worried.

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

**Kenshin's POV**

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

The town looked smaller now, I thought. The streets looked smaller and more people seem to be busying themselves with their own midnight activities. The air was crisp and I could smell the intoxicated smell from the exhaust of mobiles.

Sano was waking beside me, wearing his dangerous black mark on his forehead. I smiled to myself. The last time I saw him with that on is when someone had reportedly assaulted his previous girlfriend. The man did not survive, nor did he look like himself. Sano was sent to prison for a few months. He didn't feel guilt or remorse for what he had done. He beamed brightly when he was finally released, a big smile upon his face as the freedom sunray shone on his ragged face.

We finally turned a corner to a deserted alleyway. There was no one to be found. The place was dark and dead.

We both stopped in front of the alleyway, remembering our past and why we are brought here again. I was determined. I glanced at Sano. He nodded at me with indomitable eyes, signifying his support. I registered his resolute mind and we both walked into the alleyway, where we once nearly killed someone.

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

**Sano's POV**

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

The alleyway looked exactly the same. Nothing has changed. That garbage dump was always full. That hairy, tailless cat was always there. That red and black mark on the wall was still shining its ultimate glory as we passed. It was the mark of the _Devil's Cry_.

Suddenly, appearing from nowhere, a figure appeared from the shadows and I noticed a short figure. He was alone in the dark and I smiled, realizing who it was.

'It's been a long time,' I said to the silent air, breaking the trepidation. The figure in front of them didn't say anything. Sano chuckled and put my hands into my pocket. 'We're not here to fight. We just wanted to see the devil himself.'

The figure didn't respond for a moment, but he slowly moved forward, allowing the darkening moonlight to shine his silent figure. It was a boy no older than 15 years of age, wearing the symbolic red and black cloak. He had piercing eyes and dark ebony hair, masking his fair face with shadows only he could make himself look more frightening.

Kenshin smiled and didn't say a word.

Finally the young boy spoke with a firm and daunting voice, 'you have the nerve to come into this territory, Sano.' I deliberately smiled mockingly, 'and you have the nerve to talk back, new boy.'

The boy glared at him with his unexpected sharp eyes and he frowned when he looked at Kenshin. Kenshin was unresponsive and impassive. He barely showed any sign of movement. He was still and precise, reading the boy's movements.

'Yahiko,' I repeated with a straight-face, 'take us to the devil. We wish to speak with him.'

'And what makes you think I will do that?' the boy snickered and folded his arms sardonically. I was still patient. But my patience was running out, a weakness of mine that results to endless fights and torments.

I sniffed and poked a cigarette into my mouth. I lit the cigarette and puffed a smoke, releasing the toxic haze slowly from my mouth. Then I walked slowly forwards, calmly taking step by step with careful motion, never taking his eyes off the boy. Even for a second, I could see a glimpse of fear spread his face.

The boy took a step back as he saw my figure approaching him, casting a threatening shadow over his small body. Then I stopped and slowly released the smoke from my mouth, still not taking my eyes off the boy.

'You are not allowed to enter, traitor,' the boy said and forcefully took a wooden sword from his back and pointed it to my body. He looked at me threateningly, a determined eyes I see.

I calmly smoked the cigarette and spoke casually, 'you're not being so friendly Yahiko. Is this what you say after we haven't seen each other?'

'You left us, remember,' Yahiko took a step forward, 'or are you too stupid not to remember.'

I smiled, relishing the fear and anger in his eyes. Yahiko was shaking. He knew this was not his fight. 'I don't want to fight you Yahiko,' I said again and I carefully took a step forward. Yahiko immediately set his bamboo sword closer to my chest, his position in a defending stance. I sighed, disappointed at his actions.

'I said,' I said once more, my voice slightly sharper; 'I will not fight you.'

'My instructions were clearly to fight off traitors,' Yahiko said with a slight shiver in his voice, 'and as far as my eyes can see, both of you remain traitors.'

Without warning, Yahiko took a quick step forward, brandishing his bamboo sword quickly to my face, cutting the air with his weapon. I was quick. I dodged his sword just slightly, which nearly touched my jaw.

Yahiko made a counter-attack, wield his sword into the air and slicing the thin air in front of him. Yahiko gasped and found his target next to him. I leaned forward and whispered in his ear, 'that would hurt.'

Yahiko sniffed and slashed his sword into a yet again thin air. He was breathing quite heavily and I noticed he used a lot of his energy on his moves. Yahiko gritted his teeth and looked around to find the aura of his enemy. Too late, I was already above him, using my hand to hit the back of his neck, sending him breathless and pounded to the ground.

He cursed and choked, coughing the blood from his throat. I looked at him with a sudden guilt as he gazed up at me with blaring eyes. Yahiko struggled to lift himself off the dirty and damp ground. I looked at Kenshin, signaling him to pass, leaving my business with Yahiko to myself. Kenshin nodded and walked past Yahiko, noticing he was new to the gang and walked off into the dark of the night.

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

**Kenshin's POV**

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

I could hear my own footsteps echoing the dark halls, a trivial shadow following me as I walked through the dark and humid night. The air was cold but it didn't affect me.

It was odd, I thought to myself as I glanced around the hallway. I remembered the scent, the fluttering cold breeze and the graffiti walls. They all looked the same as far as I remembered. But for some reason, the only person standing guard at the front gate was a boy who appeared to have a connection with Sano. That would mean one thing, the devil knew I was coming, and he wanted me to come alone.

Suddenly I came to a halt when I heard a sound of a sorrowful yell at the end of the hall. I looked back and frowned. Sano surely must be alright. It was only a boy after all. I shook my head, releasing the tension spreading throughout my body and looked forward at the seemingly endless dark, and waited.

He should come soon.

Sure enough, I could feel a sudden rush of wind passing by me, waving my blood red locks. I didn't move. There were two, no, four people around me, running faster than the wind, breaking the air around them and making it their own. They were deadly silent, each pursuing their own silent paths as if walking on air. But that didn't stop me. I could still feel them, I could sense their aura.

I closed my eyes and listened to the soft calling of the zephyr. They were walking so fast around me, but then stopped to a sudden halt and then there was a deafening silence.

I slowly opened my eyes and said with a low and dangerous tone, 'you always liked surprises Aoshi.'

There was no reply. The figures in the vicinity of me didn't make a move. Unexpectedly, out of thin air, two sharp blades coming from behind and pointed at my jaw and I had to lift my head up to avoid the sharpness of the airstreams. I paused, smirking slightly at the sudden acquaintance of those twin blades.

Then, I could hear a slight masculine voice in my ear, 'your presence here is unwanted.' I paused and the chuckled, laughing at the same voice which I had come to be friends with. That voice did not change at all.

'Aoshi,' I said in a low voice so only he could here, 'you have always been good at speediness. But you are still open.'

In a matter of one second, I was already behind a dark man with black clothing and red collar, pointing at his cheek with one of his blades I had just encountered. He wasn't staggered, as expected, but he suddenly withdrew another blade and nearly slashed my right shoulder but I dodged it elegantly.

We both paused and looked at each other. I stared deep into his bold dark eyes and pondered how we became enemies. He looked expressionless as usual, with long dark hair, covering his eyes. The moon shone on his figure, a beautiful abstract of shadows juxtaposing the soft fabric of his black and red costume, emphasizing the well toned body.

I smiled at his tall and lean figure, a masculine pride spread his face and I suddenly had a sudden recalling back to the past memories. I threw his sword to him which he caught gracefully and I sighed. This was what I had thought things would be, but I have to convince him.

'Aoshi, I'm not here to ask for a fight,' I said and looked at his bold eyes. The four figures that I thought surrounded me was actually a simple illusion to Aoshi's combat style. He could make his enemy confused by allowing himself to look more than one person. I smiled… this was the Aoshi that I knew.

'You sure have the guts to come back here,' Aoshi said with a deep masculine voice. I knew he was grinning behind that expressionless face.

'I have to guts to come back here because I am asking for help,' I said again, and put my hands in my pocket. I wondered where the rest of the gang was. They must be hiding, I thought as I carefully sneak a glance around. I chuckled to myself, _so the devil wanted to see me personally. My, that is an honor._

'And what makes you think I will help you?' Aoshi simply asked, his face didn't alter a bit. I smiled genuinely, wondering how the great devil himself would accept an unexpected request.

I sighed and found my place in his eyes. He was now the devil. Aoshi, who used to be my sole apprentice, now replaced me. He had helped me when I was the devil. He even put his life in danger to protect me. Now, he looked at me with a distant eye.

'This might come off unexpected,' I continued, the soft breeze blew my red locks, 'but I want to protect someone.'

Aoshi didn't reply. He stood there with an arrogant stance.

'Quite some time ago I had seen someone that I love with another man. I know I wasn't acting mature. Now I realize my mistake,' I spoke with a determined voice, never taking my eyes off of Aoshi's even for a second, 'now, I don't want to make that same mistake again.'

I paused before continuing, 'I have someone that I want to protect, someone that I have learnt to love again. I have come to ask for a favor from a friend. If that friend can accept my apology, then I would be more than happy than to make it up to him. But if that friend does not want to help me, then I shall bow out gracefully.'

Aoshi bowed his head down and put his sword down. He was still using a sword even at this modern era, I smiled to myself. But I stared at him with a watchful gaze, wondering what his answer would be.

Then there came some footsteps behind us and I turned around to see Aoshi's subordinates running towards him. They halted in their tracks when they saw me, a surprised expression on their faces.

Aoshi held a hand, signaling for them not to enter and looked back at me. 'Himura Kenshin,' Aoshi said with a deep voice, 'if this person is important to you, then I shall help you.'

I made a small smile and bowed slowly, 'you have my thanks Aoshi.'

Aoshi's subordinates gasped and looked at me in terror. I sniffed, remembering I wasn't this soft before I left the town. My past had been ridiculously dark and dangerous. I was known to be the ultimate devil. I looked at them with intense eyes and looked back at Aoshi.

'Bring that person here. We shall talk,' Aoshi said simply. He was, of course, a man with not many words. I bowed again and slowly took a step back, gave a wave and walked out of the dark, a smile spread across my face.

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

**Kaoru's POV**

**IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**

When morning came, I woke up with a smile upon my face. I had the most romantic dream. I looked up and found Megumi's bed was empty and tidy. I looked at my watch. It was past 7 already. I got up and quickly went out from the bedroom and found the others chewing on their breakfast.

'Good morning Kaoru,' came Megumi's voice when she saw me.

'Good morning Kaoru, come here and have some breakfast,' Sano said as he crumpled his hair with his hand.

Kenshin walked out of the kitchen with a frying pan, 'who want's some more pancakes?' Then he noticed me and smiled passionately. I shivered, wondering how he could turn my stomach upside down in an instant. I smiled back and placed a big grin across my face, 'I'd like some pancakes,' and settled to sit next to Megumi and Sano.

'Kaoru, we have to go shopping today,' Megumi said after she gulped on her white milk. I looked at her in confusion, 'why?'

'Because we are going to a party tonight,' Megumi replied as Kenshin gave two pieces of pancakes on my plate. 'What party?' I asked and Megumi spoke with a casual tone, 'it's Kenshin's parent's anniversary today and they are making a special party.'

I looked at Kenshin and he smiled reassuringly. Has he settled his problems with his parents yet? I wondered to myself.

'Yes, I'd like you to meet my parents Kaoru,' Kenshin joyfully said as he sat down and helped himself a cup of coffee. I blushed at the sudden thought. Meeting Kenshin's parents? I asked myself. If there was anything more intimate, is the thought of meeting a boy's parents. Not just any boy, this was Kenshin for crying out loud.

I smiled nervously and felt a pat on my shoulder. 'Don't get so nervous Kaoru-san,' Sano said with a chuckle, 'I'm sure this foxy can get you a dress that'll turn heads.'

Megumi hit Sano's head and Sano yelped. I giggled when I saw their expression.

A party… meeting Kenshin's parents…

I looked back at Kenshin and he smiled again. I sighed and thought that as long as Kenshin was there with me, everything would be fine.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

**I guess I owe you all a very big apology. So sorry for not updating this sooner. I have sworn to myself that I will finish this story no matter what. So I have to thank the readers for being such a dear and reading this story until the end. BIG HUG TO ALL!**

**P.S. my end of semester is coming up and I have a big project due. Wish me luck!**

**Please review, it gets me get up and going. Please encourage me if I should continue with the story! **

**Cheers my friends. **


End file.
